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What do you feed your FDW?

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JR8
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Post by JR8 » Tue, 22 Oct 2013 11:13 am

Compare and Contrast with Downton Abbey. Do the servants sit down with the family for dinner? :)

I've never had a live in maid, nor wanted one. One of the reasons is precisely that I think managing the 'employer <> employee distance' must be very hard when they're living under your own roof.

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Post by Girl_Next_Door » Tue, 22 Oct 2013 11:22 am

JR8 wrote:Compare and Contrast with Downton Abbey. Do the servants sit down with the family for dinner? :)

I've never had a live in maid, nor wanted one. One of the reasons is precisely that I think managing the 'employer <> employee distance' must be very hard when they're living under your own roof.
Completely agree. My husband and I figured that we would prefer our current part-time help to come 3-4 times a week, when we have a kid. At work, you have to deal with brain-excused mouth-breathers at times, so the last thing I need is to go home and have to check if my FDW remembers to turn off the fire at the stove (another true story from my colleague!). Plus, my husband never knows how he is supposed to respond, when my part time help comes. He don't know if he should chat with her, hang around or stay in the room. Most of the time, he decides to just go out and walk for 4 hours. That would not be too practical if we have a FDW at home.

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Post by Chantikki » Tue, 22 Oct 2013 9:42 pm

bgd wrote:I'm having a chuckle at this because I've just finished reading

http://forum.singaporeexpats.com/ftopic ... highlight=

Your were OffshoreOilDude right? So things have changed in a year? :D

I think you should be feeding her the best quality steak. :wink:
Really That's you?? too funny :D

1. She probably doesn't even like steak
2. She probably doesn't like eating with you.
3. You didn't adopt a new family member, you hired some help. And she should leave you and your wife to eat in peace.
4. You are not your maids new best friends and she probably feels uncomfortable eating with you.

My maid does this, she buys stuff she likes each week and often make a big batch of some curry etc and freezes some. She likes rice and veg like bitter gourd, chicken, tofu etc, she also eats liver. Stuff we don't like -its usually reasonably priced. She likes to chill out and eat in peace out back. A couple of times a week the maids in the vicinity eat together and all bring a little something.

If your wife really wants to treat her with respect, understand her culture, and let her eat the food she likes and is used to. Let her eat with her own friends every now and again.

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Post by JR8 » Tue, 22 Oct 2013 10:55 pm

Chantikki wrote:If your wife really wants to treat her with respect, understand her culture... Let her eat with her own friends every now and again.
'Like weekend nights until 3am at Lucky Plaza, which I understand is a cultural tradition for some.'

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Post by Steve1960 » Wed, 23 Oct 2013 7:59 am

JR8 wrote:
Chantikki wrote:If your wife really wants to treat her with respect, understand her culture... Let her eat with her own friends every now and again.
'Like weekend nights until 3am at Lucky Plaza, which I understand is a cultural tradition for some.'
hahaha, and having a mobile phone surgically attached to their hand. My Filipina wife told me we were not going to have a Filipina maid under any circumstances, too much trouble :lol:

Our maid seems perfectly happy to choose what she wants to eat from Fair Price, cook for herself and eat separately. Mostly noodles, vegetables and a little pork or chicken.

She was getting a little agitated when we eat late, like on a Saturday night when we like to have a chili Con Carne in front of the football. I had to tell her it's OK for her to eat first, she does not have to wait until we have eaten!

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Post by Chantikki » Wed, 23 Oct 2013 8:15 am

JR8 wrote:
Chantikki wrote:If your wife really wants to treat her with respect, understand her culture... Let her eat with her own friends every now and again.
'Like weekend nights until 3am at Lucky Plaza, which I understand is a cultural tradition for some.'
The maids at my last condo ate every Friday night in the basement carpark (it was cluster houses) it's where they wanted to sit. And the ones in my street now go to the park next to my house, they are there for 1/2 an hour to an hour. Sometimes they cook some thing, sometimes they take left overs.

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Post by JR8 » Wed, 23 Oct 2013 10:12 am

Chantikki wrote:The maids at my last condo ate every Friday night in the basement carpark (it was cluster houses) it's where they wanted to sit. And the ones in my street now go to the park next to my house, they are there for 1/2 an hour to an hour. Sometimes they cook some thing, sometimes they take left overs.
I think it's a good thing, they can't be isolated for the entire week. Much better they're with friends and eating, than cruising Orchard Road joints after hours.

20 years ago the plot of land that is now Ion Orchard was an open green, as manicured as a putting green. It's hard to believe now*. On Sunday's you could hardly see a blade of grass as it was jam-packed with *thousands* of picnicking FDWs. I had a real WTH!!? moment when I passed by and saw that for the first time! I wonder if there is any similar venue these days?


* And that big new mall opposite Emerald Hill Road (is it '313' or similar?), on Orchard... that used to be the site of a some tacky camera etc shops and a hotel, and next to it an open air hawker centre (rather like the food places out on the East Coast - surrounding food stalls, around communal tables, out in the open air. That's where I took my parents for their first dose of chicken rice :) I recall my father thinking aloud after the meal "They haven't charged us, do you think we have to pay?" and me having visions of a cina chef coming after us waving a cleaver... hehe...

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Post by bgd » Wed, 23 Oct 2013 10:47 am

JR8 wrote: 20 years ago the plot of land that is now Ion Orchard was an open green, as manicured as a putting green. It's hard to believe now*. On Sunday's you could hardly see a blade of grass as it was jam-packed with *thousands* of picnicking FDWs. I had a real WTH!!? moment when I passed by and saw that for the first time! I wonder if there is any similar venue these days?
Yes Lucky Plaza and surrounds on a Sunday. Some of the buildings block off walkways and open areas to try and dissuade the masses congregating, without much success. Crowds are probably not on the scale that you mention though.

Out of curiosity I once ventured into Lucky Plaza to see what all the fuss is about. It’s full of maid agencies and firms providing money transfer back to the Phils. It’s very Philippine centric which explains the crowds. I wonder if that grew as a result of the Park or the Park was so crowded because of the proximity to Lucky Plaza.

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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Wed, 23 Oct 2013 11:08 am

Lucky Plaza became that way due to the park and the fact that it was centrally located and not a far distance from the Novena Church. Back when I first came here, there weren't that many Filipina maids and Lucky Plaza was probably the biggest tourist shopping centre in town and was still known for ripping off tourists even then. Especially Camera shops and Tailors. As more shopping centres grew up on OR they dispersed (a lot around the corner to Far East Plaza). But then the MRT lines opened and was convenient for the Filipino maid to go from the Novena Church (Novena MRT) down to OR and meet up. The "park" became a natural assembly area and they took over the area. Of course as Lucky Plaza's fortunes started to dim due to more and more competition, they took advantage of the preponderance of Filipinos to set up a one stop shop for them. Peninsula Plaza is the same for Burmese as is Golden Mile for the Thais. All of little India is for the Indians, Pakistanis & Bangladeshis. Seemed to work out okay.
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Wed, 23 Oct 2013 11:28 am

I hates the thread title! Sounds like you are talking about a pet goldfish or a plant or something. :lol:
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by Steve1960 » Wed, 23 Oct 2013 12:06 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:I hates the thread title! Sounds like you are talking about a pet goldfish or a plant or something. :lol:
Very funny. Maybe we should also have a thread on how to groom your maid?

I do mean grooming as in presentation and cleanliness rather than the Jimmy Saville kind of grooming :oops:

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Post by JR8 » Wed, 23 Oct 2013 12:37 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote: Peninsula Plaza is the same for Burmese as is Golden Mile for the Thais. All of little India is for the Indians, Pakistanis & Bangladeshis. Seemed to work out okay.
Interesting sub-meme. You live here, and you kind of know this ....vaguely. And yet to them it must represent a cultural hub. The idea of some cultural mini-world going on right next door, that you don't know about.


ps. The thread title jarred with me the same way. I was going to write a parody, especially as it came up in Active Topics right next to a topic/question about 'Adopting a dog'

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Post by PNGMK » Wed, 23 Oct 2013 3:05 pm

Steve1960 wrote:
sundaymorningstaple wrote:I hates the thread title! Sounds like you are talking about a pet goldfish or a plant or something. :lol:
Very funny. Maybe we should also have a thread on how to groom your maid?

I do mean grooming as in presentation and cleanliness rather than the Jimmy Saville kind of grooming :oops:
I stole the title of urbanbaby - it was "What do you feed your nanny" and the thread was full of upper class complaints about nannies eating snowflakes organic pears and drinking snowflakes coconut water.

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Post by JR8 » Wed, 23 Oct 2013 6:41 pm

Side-thought:

Is it only nationalities that are relatively 2nd/3rd world that get to have ghettos named after them, Little India, Little Thailand, Little Burma etc...

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Post by PNGMK » Wed, 23 Oct 2013 7:30 pm

JR8 wrote:Side-thought:

Is it only nationalities that are relatively 2nd/3rd world that get to have ghettos named after them, Little India, Little Thailand, Little Burma etc...
I grew up in "Little America" in PNG.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ukarumpa

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