Singapore Expats Forum

Just How Easy is it to Mingle in Singapore?

Events and gatherings for the 30's Club
User avatar
ecureilx
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 9812
Joined: Fri, 20 Aug 2010

Postby ecureilx » Tue, 22 Oct 2013 10:59 am

HA wrote:to the OP:

I suppose it also matters if you're a lady or a gent. eg, post a thread here to meet as a guy, and you would be lucky to get any/handful of responses. Post one as a girl, and the floodgates would open.

Simplest principle of supply / demand at work.


or a case of more desperate blokes vs not many desperate babes ?? :)

BedokAmerican
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 436
Joined: Tue, 15 Jan 2013

Postby BedokAmerican » Tue, 22 Oct 2013 3:11 pm

HA wrote:to the OP:

I suppose it also matters if you're a lady or a gent. eg, post a thread here to meet as a guy, and you would be lucky to get any/handful of responses. Post one as a girl, and the floodgates would open.

Simplest principle of supply / demand at work.


That might be what lots of people think, but it's not necessarily true in the online world. Go somewhere in person.....then, yes, probably much easier for women.

There's a HUGE difference between getting an online response from someone and actually meeting someone. This is typically how things work:

1. Woman* places ad, buddy request, or whatever seeking man
2. Man replies
3. Woman replies back if interested
4. Man replies back and maybe they converse with questions
5. They speak on the phone (or by computer)
6. They agree to meet somewhere
7. They meet
* Could be man placing ad seeking woman, man seeking man or woman seeking woman. Same routine.

Now, usually things fall apart during step 3 or 4. One person doesn't reply and you never hear from them again and you move on. Now, there's nothing wrong with that. It's just how stuff happens.

In other words, it's not as easy for women to meet people online as most people think. Just because 20 men reply to a woman doesn't mean she'll meet them all. She might meet 1, maybe 2, if she's lucky.

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Postby JR8 » Tue, 22 Oct 2013 6:24 pm

BedokAmerican wrote:
HA wrote:to the OP:

I suppose it also matters if you're a lady or a gent. eg, post a thread here to meet as a guy, and you would be lucky to get any/handful of responses. Post one as a girl, and the floodgates would open.

Simplest principle of supply / demand at work.


That might be what lots of people think, but it's not necessarily true in the online world. Go somewhere in person.....then, yes, probably much easier for women.

There's a HUGE difference between getting an online response from someone and actually meeting someone. This is typically how things work:

1. Woman* places ad, buddy request, or whatever seeking man
2. Man replies
3. Woman replies back if interested
4. Man replies back and maybe they converse with questions
5. They speak on the phone (or by computer)
6. They agree to meet somewhere
7. They meet
* Could be man placing ad seeking woman, man seeking man or woman seeking woman. Same routine.

Now, usually things fall apart during step 3 or 4. One person doesn't reply and you never hear from them again and you move on. Now, there's nothing wrong with that. It's just how stuff happens.

In other words, it's not as easy for women to meet people online as most people think. Just because 20 men reply to a woman doesn't mean she'll meet them all. She might meet 1, maybe 2, if she's lucky.


Online dating is very fickle. There is nothing *personally* invested or at stake if you're sitting behind a computer. You aren't workmates, or friends of friends. Strangers this morning, strangers again tomorrow morning.

Walk into a bar to meet for the first time, don't like the face? 'Oh excuse me I have to go to the bathroom' [i.e. a hasty exit home, via the backdoor]. You'd be amused or alarmed how many people over-sell themselves...

Meet, and get on, and there can be a rabid sexual relationship from barely before leaving the bar/restaurant. The animal unleashed (honestly! :)).

But there's also an ironic 'f**k and chuck' mentality. That is because - the underlying feeling remains - Anyone who is sad enough to date online, isn't a keeper.

I did it for about 2-3 months 15 years ago. During the ego-rebuild phase post a divorce. If you give it a go, I'd suggest having no expectations, bar going out, meeting some interesting/boring/weird, occasionally fun people. You are not gong to meet 'The One', but if you're cool, and good company, you will probably have some fun along the way...

contraband258
Newbie
Newbie
Posts: 5
Joined: Sat, 26 Oct 2013

Postby contraband258 » Sat, 26 Oct 2013 10:05 am

Its the mindset and realism. You almost always see guys approaching girls and not the other way around. So girls know that guys will approach them. Whereas if they are in groups, they can be enjoying their time and not looking for anything more.
So a lone guy approaches one of the girls or the group of girls. See how it would look weird or awkward.
So the guy tries to chat a girl, she would have peer pressure of whether to go for it or think about her own group. The guy appears to be on his own, lonely, maybe weird, where's his friends, something wrong with him so he doesnt have a friend with him. Not a good social standing.

But if he was in a group, the girls will see he's somewhat 'decent' enough to have some boys with him having a good time, think he's a fun guy and maybe chat back with him or one from his group, hence the term 'wingman'

User avatar
ecureilx
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 9812
Joined: Fri, 20 Aug 2010

Postby ecureilx » Sun, 27 Oct 2013 12:03 pm

contraband258 wrote:But if he was in a group, the girls will see he's somewhat 'decent' enough to have some boys with him having a good time, think he's a fun guy and maybe chat back with him or one from his group, hence the term 'wingman'


or few girls told me how they feel, guys in a group = Wolf Pack, and they all want to "SCORE.. "

Oh, what do I know ..

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Postby JR8 » Sun, 27 Oct 2013 12:16 pm

I always let the women come to me, until my bedpost fell-apart.

Ah, those were the days :cool: :wink:

jktokyo
Newbie
Newbie
Posts: 17
Joined: Fri, 26 Apr 2013

Postby jktokyo » Tue, 03 Dec 2013 9:34 pm

...........
Last edited by jktokyo on Wed, 04 Dec 2013 10:36 am, edited 2 times in total.

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Postby JR8 » Tue, 03 Dec 2013 9:43 pm

jktokyo wrote:haha... i have to say this is one of the most interesting posts in the forum, i did actually read all posts here.

Agree, its not easy to meet random people here in sg, its even better in Tokyo. Btw, the bar in Tokyo is called Geronimos, my favorite place, fun as hell, everybody gets whatever you want... casual talks, random drink buddies, or maybe more... lol

Mogambos here is a bit disappointing, i think. But well... maybe New Asia bar at raffles city?

Good luck!

JK.



Kin ell, they're still around?

I used to live in Roppongi (Ark Towers) and pull at Gas Panic, Magumbos and Julianas.

Used to call my ('other-clock') cohort on 7am duty in London and leave the line open while I pleasured the lady de ce night, just to p*** him off to the max, and because the birds made so much noise.

jktokyo
Newbie
Newbie
Posts: 17
Joined: Fri, 26 Apr 2013

Postby jktokyo » Tue, 03 Dec 2013 9:55 pm

............
Last edited by jktokyo on Wed, 04 Dec 2013 10:37 am, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Postby JR8 » Tue, 03 Dec 2013 10:02 pm

Start a place, with a bunch of Roppongi girls?


p.s. I'm glad Gas-Panic closed. That was a really sort of 'kin dirty place to pull chicks lol! Mind you Gas Panic was like 'industrial ****ing'.

I've stilll got a couple of their beer-coupons (plastic dinosaurs) upon my chest... heirlooms to an earlier time :)



- Are there any really slut-tastic joints in Singapore? Still?)
Last edited by JR8 on Tue, 03 Dec 2013 10:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.

jktokyo
Newbie
Newbie
Posts: 17
Joined: Fri, 26 Apr 2013

Postby jktokyo » Tue, 03 Dec 2013 10:08 pm

..............
Last edited by jktokyo on Wed, 04 Dec 2013 10:37 am, edited 1 time in total.

Aurelialo
Newbie
Newbie
Posts: 16
Joined: Fri, 29 Nov 2013

Postby Aurelialo » Tue, 03 Dec 2013 10:26 pm

well the best way to make friends is for us to plan a date and meet up all together and make friends! :)

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Postby JR8 » Tue, 03 Dec 2013 10:27 pm

You're not in a bar to meet a girl-friend, you're there for sex.

Her friends are irrelevant, apart from appearing nice to them, in case she nods over for a side reference/confirmation.

The dynamic here in Asia, is very different to the whole thing in the US.




p..s. I'll leave it to some youngsters to explain how it is and compares these days :)

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Postby JR8 » Tue, 03 Dec 2013 10:28 pm

Aurelialo wrote:well the best way to make friends is for us to plan a date and meet up all together and make friends! :)


Like a gang-bang right?

jktokyo
Newbie
Newbie
Posts: 17
Joined: Fri, 26 Apr 2013

Postby jktokyo » Tue, 03 Dec 2013 10:33 pm

..................
Last edited by jktokyo on Wed, 04 Dec 2013 10:38 am, edited 1 time in total.


  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Return to “30's Club”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests