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Interracial Couples--How Common?

Discuss about the latest news & interesting topics, real life experience or other out of topic discussions with locals & expatriates in Singapore.

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Wd40
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Postby Wd40 » Wed, 13 Feb 2013 9:02 pm

Interesting! Several regulars on this board have a local/asian spouse! May be thats one big big factor thats kind of anchoring them to this place, through the good and bad times.

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Postby WanWanWan » Wed, 13 Feb 2013 9:58 pm

Hookay, so this thread went in some strange directions!

If you read my original posts, you'll see my issue: what other people think is not my business. It is a problem, however, when we are refused service, accosted by complete strangers, etc. several times a week. I was more interested if these things happen in Singapore. Staring is merely unpleasant and frankly not worth worrying much about.

One of the reasons we get so much trouble is that we are the opposite of what happens more frequently: Asian male, Caucasian female. Apparently we are thus the spawn of Satan. My own family actually disowned me for marrying, so neither of us are really going to let what some racist idiots think affect things. It's just when we aren't able to buy a car because "we don't sell to your type" that we take umbrage.

Anyway, it's good to know that so many people here are "mixed" couples and that they don't get much trouble. Thank you to everyone who was able to let me know this. The odd bit of bother here and there is expected. Even when I'm on my own, the occasional drunk guy will harass me, so no-one can really expect to be free of such things. As long as it isn't as bad or worse than how things are over here, we're happy.

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Postby Mi Amigo » Wed, 13 Feb 2013 10:09 pm

WanWanWan, given your circumstances, previous experiences, and i seems, a decent thick skin, I honestly don't think you'll have any problems here. Just pull a funny smile like I do if someone stares too long.
Be careful what you wish for

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Postby sundaymorningstaple » Wed, 13 Feb 2013 10:32 pm

Wd40 wrote:Interesting! Several regulars on this board have a local/asian spouse! May be thats one big big factor thats kind of anchoring them to this place, through the good and bad times.


Not necessarily. My wife was ready to go the the US when we got married. In fact. She had her green card as well for three years and then we gave it up to stay here as I decided it would be better to raise kids here than in the US and they'd probably get a better education as well. I still believe I did right.

Seriously, it's hard to take your comment at face as a local marrying a westerner was always seen as marrying a ticket out of this place. So, the kind of goes against the grain of what you are thinking a wee bit. Could be, but I doubt it.

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Postby Wd40 » Wed, 13 Feb 2013 11:04 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:
Wd40 wrote:Interesting! Several regulars on this board have a local/asian spouse! May be thats one big big factor thats kind of anchoring them to this place, through the good and bad times.


Not necessarily. My wife was ready to go the the US when we got married. In fact. She had her green card as well for three years and then we gave it up to stay here as I decided it would be better to raise kids here than in the US and they'd probably get a better education as well. I still believe I did right.

Seriously, it's hard to take your comment at face as a local marrying a westerner was always seen as marrying a ticket out of this place. So, the kind of goes against the grain of what you are thinking a wee bit. Could be, but I doubt it.


Actually my comment was just an observation that a high proportion of regulars on this forum, who are here for quite some time, have a local/Asian spouse.

So I was just trying to find a pattern here. Having a local or Asian spouse seems to make people have a stronger bond to this country and hence this forum, compared to pure expat-expat couple?

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Postby rajagainstthemachine » Wed, 13 Feb 2013 11:31 pm

you know given the the amount of western influence that Singapore has had, I would have thought the locals here would have been used to these kind of relationships. It's rather surprising to note the close mindedness that the OP has been exposed to.

I have a slightly different problem of my own, I am a bit fair and I'm from South India where a majority of the population are well dark.
Most south Indians in Singapore particularly around the Little India belt assume I am from the north and hurl their choicest abuses at me when I'm walking along thinking that I don't speak/understand Tamil when in fact I speak 4-5 different Indian languages and when they do that I turn around and ask them in polished polite tamil whats the time or directions to a particular place and their expressions are well shocking.
I think being overly judgmental is a habit forming trait in Singapore. I don't know if its the weather or just having to deal with too many people face to face everyday.

I probably attribute this hate to the fact that since most people don't have cars here and cannot demonstrate road rage the only other outlet for the seething inner rage is to pick on the "queers and the things that don't fit in "



[Pro-tip : South Indians and North Indians don't get along particularly well together and we know this because of friction back home and its no different here.]

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Postby Wd40 » Thu, 14 Feb 2013 12:16 am

It's because of the propaganda that has been ingrained into them from several generations. Speak to any Singaporean Indian and you will come to know very quickly what has been "taught" to them about India :-|

The version of Tamil that Singaporeans speak is actually very antique and many of India Indian Tamils also cannot understand. In the same manner some of the perceptions they have about India are also about a century old :)

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Postby Brah » Thu, 14 Feb 2013 12:46 am

[quote="Wd40"The version of Tamil that Singaporeans speak is actually very antique and .... some of the perceptions they have about India are also about a century old :)[/quote]
Kinda like some of the people's names I've heard since I've been here.

Some are so antiquated I had to bite my tongue. Can't think of any ATM.

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Postby sundaymorningstaple » Thu, 14 Feb 2013 6:58 am

Wd40 wrote:It's because of the propaganda that has been ingrained into them from several generations. Speak to any Singaporean Indian and you will come to know very quickly what has been "taught" to them about India :-|

The version of Tamil that Singaporeans speak is actually very antique and many of India Indian Tamils also cannot understand. In the same manner some of the perceptions they have about India are also about a century old :)


Similarly, it's normally very easy to pick up on an Indian from the subcontinent if they speak English as taught in India as it is also antiquated shakespearean english and the "floral" english sounds funny as the devil, (discounting the accents, as I'm really speaking from the written word. I don't even have to look where a CV is from or the name on the CV. The style of English gives them away every time. I am having very good experience there.

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Postby bluenose » Thu, 14 Feb 2013 7:16 am

When the staring is at my missus and I....she is local Singaporean Chinese..I usually take two stances.....one is reply 'excuse me what is it....am I wearing your jumper or something'.....or 'yes we are' is the other one.
The one with the step-daughter has happened often.....and the sick thoughts are obviously with the people staring.....and they think we are bad :wink:

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Postby morenangpinay » Thu, 14 Feb 2013 10:16 am

some old episode of tyra banks show before featured americans marrying foreign brides... the reaction of the american women were amusing and hilarious... such as why do you men have to go out to the world to find a bride when there are so many american women who are looking for husbands...something like that.. cant find the video.

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Postby rajagainstthemachine » Thu, 14 Feb 2013 12:31 pm

Wd40 wrote:It's because of the propaganda that has been ingrained into them from several generations. Speak to any Singaporean Indian and you will come to know very quickly what has been "taught" to them about India :-|


Pardon me, but what are most S-Tamils opinion about Indians from India?
I quite like the Singaporean Tamil actually, its very polite although old sounding.
Also, my experiences with abuse hurling Tamils were mostly from Tamils from India not Tamils from Singapore :-|

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Postby Wd40 » Thu, 14 Feb 2013 12:46 pm

rajagainstthemachine wrote:
Wd40 wrote:It's because of the propaganda that has been ingrained into them from several generations. Speak to any Singaporean Indian and you will come to know very quickly what has been "taught" to them about India :-|


Pardon me, but what are most S-Tamils opinion about Indians from India?
I quite like the Singaporean Tamil actually, its very polite although old sounding.
Also, my experiences with abuse hurling Tamils were mostly from Tamils from India not Tamils from Singapore :-|



If you were talking about Indian Tamilians and you know that in India north Indians and south Indians dont get along too well, why did you make the statement below, as if implying its something to do with Singapore???? Indian problem take it to India man, dont bring it here :mad: :x :roll:

rajagainstthemachine wrote:
I think being overly judgmental is a habit forming trait in Singapore. I don't know if its the weather or just having to deal with too many people face to face everyday.

I probably attribute this hate to the fact that since most people don't have cars here and cannot demonstrate road rage the only other outlet for the seething inner rage is to pick on the "queers and the things that don't fit in "

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Postby rajagainstthemachine » Thu, 14 Feb 2013 1:13 pm

Wd40 wrote:
rajagainstthemachine wrote:
Wd40 wrote:It's because of the propaganda that has been ingrained into them from several generations. Speak to any Singaporean Indian and you will come to know very quickly what has been "taught" to them about India :-|


Pardon me, but what are most S-Tamils opinion about Indians from India?
I quite like the Singaporean Tamil actually, its very polite although old sounding.
Also, my experiences with abuse hurling Tamils were mostly from Tamils from India not Tamils from Singapore :-|



If you were talking about Indian Tamilians and you know that in India north Indians and south Indians dont get along too well, why did you make the statement below, as if implying its something to do with Singapore???? Indian problem take it to India man, dont bring it here :mad: :x :roll:

rajagainstthemachine wrote:
I think being overly judgmental is a habit forming trait in Singapore. I don't know if its the weather or just having to deal with too many people face to face everyday.

I probably attribute this hate to the fact that since most people don't have cars here and cannot demonstrate road rage the only other outlet for the seething inner rage is to pick on the "queers and the things that don't fit in "



well the thing is , I'm experiencing the problem in Singapore not in India.
I rarely ever experience that problem in India actually :-|
Having been in Bangalore for most of my life I've had both north and south indian friends in equal proportion , but ever since I've moved here this issue seems to be localized to Indians living in and around the Little India belt. it's therefore a fine shade of grey. :?

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Postby rajagainstthemachine » Thu, 14 Feb 2013 1:18 pm

Anyway back on topic , my personal experience

hanging out with white girls in India:
crowd response : Lucky bastard

hanging out with white girls in Singapore
crowd response : ugly hostile stare

hanging out with white girls in Little India in Singapore on a Sunday
crowd response: indescribable
me: uh oh what have i just gotten myself into?

hanging out with white girls in western countries
crowd response: couldn't care less


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