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by rajagainstthemachine » Sat, 04 Oct 2014 8:42 pm
WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS
These glorious insults are from an era when 4-letter words weren't necessary..
A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease."
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow.
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas. (Moses Hadas was an American teacher, one of the leading classical scholars of the twentieth century, and a translator of numerous works)
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain.
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde.
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill.
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second ... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." -Stephen Bishop.
"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright.
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb.
"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." - Samuel Johnson.
"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating.
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker.
"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain.
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.."
- Mae West.
"Some cause. happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." - Oscar Wilde.
To get there early is on time and showing up on time is late