Singapore Expats Forum

Considering Singapore - How is the Social life and dating?

Discuss about the latest news & interesting topics, real life experience or other out of topic discussions with locals & expatriates in Singapore.

Tony3d
Member
Member
Posts: 21
Joined: Tue, 24 Jul 2012
Location: Arizona
Contact:

Postby Tony3d » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 10:26 am

the lynx wrote:Umm I may be wrong but doesn't it sound like you're putting girls in higher priority than your career prospects in your decision-making?

I'd say that you should be proud of what you're doing, rather than thinking that your current path is the reason that no girl would ever want you - that's pathetic!

Go out there and brave the world with what you once wanted to do - the women will come eventually; I mean the right ones.

And you're just 22, for heaven's sake! Not 32!


You are 100% correct.

Yes, it is most definatly a very stupid and ignorant thing for me to do. I am not in denial about that. But in the end I just want to be someplace where I don't feel so alone, and that absolutly means more to me than career prospects at the moment.

No matter how much logic you throw at it, my priorities remain the same, and I would in the end throw everything out the window to find a place where I could fit in and meet girls.

User avatar
zzm9980
Governor
Governor
Posts: 6837
Joined: Wed, 06 Jul 2011
Location: Once more unto the breach

Postby zzm9980 » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 11:04 am

Tony3d wrote:and for the record, Phoenix is a real city...


No it's not, not compared to say Chicago or NYC. I hesitate to even give the title to anything on the West Coast, but you can probably get the requisite amount of diversity and culture by including the entire Bay Area for SF, or SoCal for LA.

Tony3d wrote:I guess that depends on what you mean by "sheltered". If the fact that I have been spending way too much of my time working instead of going out and socializing and meeting girls, so I have very little expereince, then I couldn't agree more.


That's exactly what I mean. And that lack of socialization limits your life experiences, because socialization is an important part of life.

User avatar
sundaymorningstaple
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 34270
Joined: Thu, 11 Nov 2004
Location: Still Fishing!
Contact:

Postby sundaymorningstaple » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 11:21 am

Tony, I hate to say it, but you are going to be "alone" no matter where you go, anywhere in the world. But you are alone because you want to be. :-|

Tony3d
Member
Member
Posts: 21
Joined: Tue, 24 Jul 2012
Location: Arizona
Contact:

Postby Tony3d » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 11:34 am

sundaymorningstaple wrote:Tony, I hate to say it, but you are going to be "alone" no matter where you go, anywhere in the world. But you are alone because you want to be. :-|


hmmm... I understand that it is probably my own fault, but I am confused by the whole I want to be part...

I apoligize for getting things off topic here, but when people who have more expereince than me offer me advice, I always listen and ask questions, even though it might not be the proper place to have such a discussion.

User avatar
the lynx
Governor
Governor
Posts: 5239
Joined: Thu, 09 Dec 2010
Location: Midgar

Postby the lynx » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 12:09 pm

Just wanna share a message I think may suit you.

Image

Road Not Taken by Robert Frost, a very good poem.

User avatar
sundaymorningstaple
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 34270
Joined: Thu, 11 Nov 2004
Location: Still Fishing!
Contact:

Postby sundaymorningstaple » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 12:20 pm

I am such a person. But it's by choice. I can be in a crowded bar and still be alone. And it shows. Nothing that can be defined, but maybe a certain aloofness that we, ourselves don't seen/sense but the observer can feel it. When I'm in this state, interestingly enough, I am left alone. But if I am ambivalent about "company" that also shows somehow (vibes? cosmic aural halo? I don't know) and it will happen without my conscious bidding.

It did take me many years to "come out of my shell" but I can still be that way today on occasion (especially when rellies show up). ;-)

User avatar
Strong Eagle
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 10414
Joined: Sat, 10 Jul 2004
Location: Off The Red Dot
Contact:

Postby Strong Eagle » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 12:28 pm

the lynx wrote:Just wanna share a message I think may suit you.


Road Not Taken by Robert Frost, a very good poem.


That's nice.

User avatar
nakatago
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 8333
Joined: Tue, 01 Sep 2009
Location: Sister Margaret’s School for Wayward Children
Contact:

Postby nakatago » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 12:31 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:It did take me many years to "come out of my shell" but I can still be that way today on occasion (especially when rellies show up). ;-)


My relatives insist that whenever some distant other relatives come, we should always socialize as if we've been BFF's for life. They don't get that blood isn't sufficient for such a bond or social interaction or that some people are just not that enthusiastic about social interactions.

User avatar
v4jr4
Reporter
Reporter
Posts: 887
Joined: Mon, 09 Jul 2012
Location: Chocolate Factory

Postby v4jr4 » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 12:44 pm

nakatago wrote:
sundaymorningstaple wrote:It did take me many years to "come out of my shell" but I can still be that way today on occasion (especially when rellies show up). ;-)


My relatives insist that whenever some distant other relatives come, we should always socialize as if we've been BFF's for life. They don't get that blood isn't sufficient for such a bond or social interaction or that some people are just not that enthusiastic about social interactions.


We don't have such obligation to do that. Sadly speaking, some people refer the BFF-because-blood-is-thicker with morality, ethics, etc. Heck, I don't even know what's their hobbies or favorite food :???:

I do remember a quote from Dilbert: "Morality is based on accepted norms. And accepted norms are based on morality." BFF is BFF, unless it's a "forced BFF". People change, sooner or later.

User avatar
x9200
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 9166
Joined: Mon, 07 Sep 2009
Location: Singapore

Postby x9200 » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 4:00 pm

Tony3d wrote:Yes, it is most definatly a very stupid and ignorant thing for me to do. I am not in denial about that. But in the end I just want to be someplace where I don't feel so alone, and that absolutly means more to me than career prospects at the moment.

No matter how much logic you throw at it, my priorities remain the same, and I would in the end throw everything out the window to find a place where I could fit in and meet girls.

Don't call it illogical because there is nothing illogical to follow your emotions. It would be just doing the opposite. All is needed is a right balance.

Tony3d
Member
Member
Posts: 21
Joined: Tue, 24 Jul 2012
Location: Arizona
Contact:

Postby Tony3d » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 4:44 pm

x9200 wrote:
Tony3d wrote:Yes, it is most definatly a very stupid and ignorant thing for me to do. I am not in denial about that. But in the end I just want to be someplace where I don't feel so alone, and that absolutly means more to me than career prospects at the moment.

No matter how much logic you throw at it, my priorities remain the same, and I would in the end throw everything out the window to find a place where I could fit in and meet girls.

Don't call it illogical because there is nothing illogical to follow your emotions. It would be just doing the opposite. All is needed is a right balance.


Well, in the end I probably would have a problem regardless of what I chose as a career path, so I should just get over it.

User avatar
x9200
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 9166
Joined: Mon, 07 Sep 2009
Location: Singapore

Postby x9200 » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 5:34 pm

Tony3d wrote:
x9200 wrote:
Tony3d wrote:Yes, it is most definatly a very stupid and ignorant thing for me to do. I am not in denial about that. But in the end I just want to be someplace where I don't feel so alone, and that absolutly means more to me than career prospects at the moment.

No matter how much logic you throw at it, my priorities remain the same, and I would in the end throw everything out the window to find a place where I could fit in and meet girls.

Don't call it illogical because there is nothing illogical to follow your emotions. It would be just doing the opposite. All is needed is a right balance.


Well, in the end I probably would have a problem regardless of what I chose as a career path, so I should just get over it.

What I am trying to say is that what is in your private life is a part of the same equation so maximizing your career in expense of the former will unlikely make you a happy guy at the end of your life. The other way it does not work as well so a balance is needed but it does not mean there is one right way and this is by giving your career unrivaled priority.

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Postby JR8 » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 5:45 pm

the lynx wrote:Just wanna share a message I think may suit you.
...
Road Not Taken by Robert Frost, a very good poem.




Agreed. It's also nice to read it in the original lay-out (stanzas) where you feel the internal rhythm much more clearly.

Image

User avatar
the lynx
Governor
Governor
Posts: 5239
Joined: Thu, 09 Dec 2010
Location: Midgar

Postby the lynx » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 6:11 pm

JR8 wrote:
the lynx wrote:Just wanna share a message I think may suit you.
...
Road Not Taken by Robert Frost, a very good poem.




Agreed. It's also nice to read it in the original lay-out (stanzas) where you feel the internal rhythm much more clearly.

Image


Ah I still love the good old style of poems. Zen Pencils' way of illustrating poems and quotes gives a refreshing outlook, which I believe more suited to people his age.

morenangpinay
Reporter
Reporter
Posts: 890
Joined: Mon, 02 Mar 2009

Postby morenangpinay » Thu, 26 Jul 2012 6:30 pm

wow. this stuff is long :lol:

You are very serious about this. anyway my advice is you need to work on your confidence in being alone, because you will always be alone where ever you are because you can't place your happiness on other people.

about the girls you mentioned, maybe you are looking at the wrong type of girls? in any country i believe girls will be the same, and if you keep being anti-social even though you aren't comfortable with being alone, you will always have the same result no matter which country you move to.


  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Return to “General Discussions”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

cron