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sundaymorningstaple
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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Sat, 05 May 2012 12:08 am

My son was thrown out of school today for letting a girl in his class give him a hand-job. I said "Son, that's three schools this year! You'd better stop before you're banned from teaching altogether." :-/


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The wife suggested I get myself one of those penis enlargers, so I did. She's 25, and her name's Kathy. :)
Last edited by sundaymorningstaple on Sat, 05 May 2012 12:16 am, edited 1 time in total.
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by JR8 » Sat, 05 May 2012 12:15 am

Good one! :)

(And very un-PC!)

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sundaymorningstaple
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Corruption in India?

Post by sundaymorningstaple » Tue, 08 May 2012 9:55 am

In one of the State in India recently, a MP during his speech told a story.....

"There was a father who gave र1000/- each to his 3 sons and asked them to buy things and fill up a room completely.
First son bought hay for र1000/- but couldn't fill the room entirely. Second son bought cotton for र1000/- but couldn't fill the room entirely. Third son bought a candle for र10/- and lit it up and the room was filled with light completely."

The proud MP declared: "Our Chief Minister is like the third son. From the day he has taken charge of his office, our state is filled with the bright light of prosperity."

A voice from the backbench asked, "Where is the remaining र990/-???"
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Wed, 09 May 2012 9:08 am

The Penis Study

The American Government funded a study to see why the head of a man's penis was larger than the shaft. After 1 year and $180,000, they concluded that the reason that the head was larger than the shaft was to give the man more pleasure during sex. After the US published the study, the French decided to do they're own study. After $250,000 and 3 years of research, they concluded that the reason the head was larger than the shaft was to give the woman more pleasure during sex. Three Polocks, unsatisfied with these findings, conducted their own study. After 2 weeks, a cost of around $75.46, and 2 cases of beer they concluded that it was to keep a man's hand from flying off and hitting himself in the forehead.

With apologies to some of our readers. :oops: - I just cut and pasted it from FB!
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by Saint » Wed, 09 May 2012 10:09 am

My missus was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.
She was not happy with what she saw and said to me,
"I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
I replied, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."

And then the fight started........

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Post by Saint » Wed, 09 May 2012 12:06 pm

My girlfriend just caught me blow drying my penis and she asked what was i doing, apparently "heating up your dinner" was not the right answer !

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Do you want Coke?

Post by sundaymorningstaple » Fri, 18 May 2012 10:40 am

Just a little Friday gutter humour.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yTM68VbDrMQ
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Wed, 23 May 2012 2:10 pm

I feel much the same way about apple.

Image
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Male Fairy Tale

Post by sundaymorningstaple » Fri, 25 May 2012 8:28 am

Male Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess, “Will you marry me?”
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Thu, 07 Jun 2012 2:25 pm

SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by Mi Amigo » Thu, 07 Jun 2012 8:57 pm

Marvellous :cool:
Be careful what you wish for

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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Thu, 07 Jun 2012 9:02 pm

Mi Amigo wrote:Marvellous :cool:
The clip or me gettin' 'em too! [-X :lol:
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by Mi Amigo » Fri, 08 Jun 2012 1:54 am

Er... Getting what? Who are you again? :twisted:
Be careful what you wish for

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Post by Mi Amigo » Fri, 08 Jun 2012 2:02 am

Oh, I remember now - senior moments. Like this maybe?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bIN_Fyf5VGY
Be careful what you wish for

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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Fri, 08 Jun 2012 3:43 pm

:o
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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