City Square Residences? US Expat family

[x9200]

Damn, this is really bad.

[the lynx]

One point to ponder.

What if it is a group of Caucasian men staring instead? Would a female here still give a hoot about it?

[ecureilx]

Damn, this is really bad.

Then again, these are not new ..

And a month ago, workers were staring at 'modestly dressed 'bikini clad' women in the "POOL" at Sengkang CC .. (I could not figure that out though .. )

And it's not unique to Singapore

Last month, while in KL, there was some hoo-ha that some Arab man slapped a local girl for dressing improperly or something ..

And when I was in the Komuter, there was a Malay couple hugging and practically the whole men-folk were throwing daggers at the girl (yes, the girl, not the guy .. ) and also same time there was some noise about Myanmar workers gawking at people along the Malacca beach ..

So. back to the topic .. again, City Square, comparatively, is free of such drama .. says me ..

the lynx: sometime ago a local blogger wrote that when it is caucasian men, it is considered to be ok and he is 'admiring' the asian girls .. and likewise, when a caucasian asks a girl out, it is considered sweet (unlike when an asian asks a girl - he is branded as sleazy and pervert .. ) you get the drift ??

[x9200]

One point to ponder.

What if it is a group of Caucasian men staring instead? Would a female here still give a hoot about it?

Such a big group using HP cams etc? I bet yes. Staring at somebody in much more neutral setting is simply consider impolite.

[nakatago]

the lynx: sometime ago a local blogger wrote that when it is caucasian men, it is considered to be ok and he is 'admiring' the asian girls .. and likewise, when a caucasian asks a girl out, it is considered sweet (unlike when an asian asks a girl - he is branded as sleazy and pervert .. ) you get the drift ??

That is just being racist.

But it still holds--staring to the point of making women uncomfortable is still sleazy.

[sundaymorningstaple]

Frankly, I've never seen hoards or Caucasians clustered around 2 or 3 girls for hours staring at them, skimpily dressed or not. (Except in a girlie bar, that is - Makati comes to mind). Oogling/wolf whistles as they pass by a construction site, yeah. But crap like in the photo? Can't ever remember seeing something like that. Not saying it isn't done, but I've never seen it, unless it was being deliberately staged by the ladies, e.g., a victoria secrets fashion show in the middle of times square or something.

[JR8]

Some double-blind stereotype evidence

We spent Easter in Lebanon. One day we were at a major tourist attraction north of Beirut where we encountered a group of Indian men. They were probably workers in the country, very neatly dressed and turned out (I had to do a double-take on one chap's coiffed moustache!) and taking photographs of each other. These were the usual full-length stiff upright, staring straight to camera kind of shots, as my wife pointed out the only stereotype box not being ticked was that they were not holding hands.

Shortly afterwards this group of maybe 6-8 men walked past us in single file, my wife was in front of me. Every one, at the last moment before passing my wife, did a momentary visual lock-on of her chest. How I laughed! The irony is that Arabs have a bit of a rep for being sleazy, but she did not attract this kind of leering from the Lebanese at all.


Next up.
We were walking down an access tunnel into some underground caves. Probably room for five people abreast at any point. Oncoming were a family of Chinese origin seemingly oblivious to us going in the other direction. I could see the father was going to walk right into me, and having nowhere to go I let him hehehe. Bam, I expect that hurt a bit.

Shortly afterwards my wife remarked that she thought she might know the guy who walked into me. Later that day we were pottering around a castle and bumped into the same family again (although not literally this time). Lo and behold, she did know them, and they are Singaporean. So they're as blind/oblivious as well when abroad it seems...

Alas no Malays I noticed to round up this cultural box-ticking anecdote. But I can report that Beirut has a Pinay quarter. Fair heaving on Easter Sunday. 'Hey it's like Lucky Plaza' I quipped as we passed one crowded small mall.

Cultural side-note.
Interesting for both me and my wife (from different sides of the coin) to see Christianity practiced in Arabic. (The bible in Arabic; on TV a nun doing a reading in Arabic with almost Koranic intonations). Was further surprised to go to a catholic shrine and see scarfies (aka tudung-aunties, i.e. women in 'muslim' head-scarves) lighting votive candles.... still can't figure that one out...

[zzm9980]

did they try to talk to her ? well, are you serious ?

Yes, they occasionally talk. Last time while pushing a stroller and our daughter, she said 6-10 Indians (probably Banglas, she won't know) all walked around very close and started asking her name, if she was a maid (she looks young and our baby looks a lot more caucasian than asian), and where she lived. Similar things happened at least two times before. She generally just walks away and they leave her alone. Always at ECP. I honestly didn't realize this was "report" worthy, but now she just doesn't go there alone.

Ah now I understand. Those workers are usually on prowl on maids. I wouldn't be surprised if they pull that to maids actually. Maybe (no offence) they think that your wife is a maid pushing a stroller with employer's baby inside, hence the come-on.

Yeah, thats exactly what we assumed too. I'm caucasian, wife is Vietnamese. Our daughter looks 99.9% caucasian, so more than a few times (not just with foreign workers) people have thought she was a maid watching the baby. Happens in the HDB playground too, but the Chinese aunties she's talking to at least aren't hitting on her

[carteki]

Cultural side-note.
Interesting for both me and my wife (from different sides of the coin) to see Christianity practiced in Arabic. (The bible in Arabic; on TV a nun doing a reading in Arabic with almost Koranic intonations). Was further surprised to go to a catholic shrine and see scarfies (aka tudung-aunties, i.e. women in 'muslim' head-scarves) lighting votive candles.... still can't figure that one out...

Makes perfect sense to me. Clothing and religion are 2 different things (despite what people will have you believe) and there is nothing stopping christian women from dressing according to their culture - ie head scarf. It is also a way of not standing out as different. On a similar note missionaries in China found that it was better if their bibles had a red cover (aka Chairman Mao's book) as it stood out less.

[JR8]

But most women in Lebanon do not wear head-scarves. So wearing one for a Christian is not just a case of 'fitting in', it is a case of opting to look like part of another minority, hence the puzzlement.

Here was the scene. Crap pic I know (one for the bin), but I was walking along and trying to be discreet. Still, it illustrates the point.

[carteki]

Actually my bad - its as prescribed in the bible ...

but every woman praying or prophesying with her head uncovered dishonors her head

I Corinthians 11:5

It a custom that is generally ignored in the modern day, but in the Amish and other very traditional christian cultures women still keep themselves covered.

[nutnut]

Avoid the area with City Square and Mustafa with kids if you are not into being squashed and pushed about the place. Whether it's nice and safety isn't an issue, they are an incredible amount of people!

Indians/Foreign workers staring at women, creepy... My wife gets men staring (Generally Indian men to be honest, no other men stare at her except me!) and tends to just ignore them, but the photo on the beach, that is just extreme, I'd simply tell them all to f*** off, it's totally disrespectful hanging in gaggles staring at women, attractive or not!

[JR8]

Actually my bad - its as prescribed in the bible ...

but every woman praying or prophesying with her head uncovered dishonors her head

I Corinthians 11:5

It a custom that is generally ignored in the modern day, but in the Amish and other very traditional christian cultures women still keep themselves covered.

Hmmm interesting Carteki. Maybe there is a connection with Catholics women wearing mantillas or what ever they call them.

I went to an Amish wedding in Ohio... woo hoo... what a memorable and jolly day that was (not! ).

[ganeshiyerv]

did they try to talk to her ? well, are you serious ?

Yes, they occasionally talk. Last time while pushing a stroller and our daughter, she said 6-10 Indians (probably Banglas, she won't know) all walked around very close and started asking her name, if she was a maid (she looks young and our baby looks a lot more caucasian than asian), and where she lived. Similar things happened at least two times before. She generally just walks away and they leave her alone. Always at ECP. I honestly didn't realize this was "report" worthy, but now she just doesn't go there alone.

Its very disturbing and totally disgusting. I agree most of the Indians are a sexually frustrated lot but this is the tops. Little India is especially crowded with 'gawkers' during the weekends. Very sad.

[ecureilx]

did they try to talk to her ? well, are you serious ?

Yes, they occasionally talk. Last time while pushing a stroller and our daughter, she said 6-10 Indians (probably Banglas, she won't know) all walked around very close and started asking her name, if she was a maid (she looks young and our baby looks a lot more caucasian than asian), and where she lived. Similar things happened at least two times before. She generally just walks away and they leave her alone. Always at ECP. I honestly didn't realize this was "report" worthy, but now she just doesn't go there alone.

Its very disturbing and totally disgusting. I agree most of the Indians are a sexually frustrated lot but this is the tops. Little India is especially crowded with 'gawkers' during the weekends. Very sad.

Interesting, that you jumped from 'probably Banglas' to "all Indians" ...etc. etc..

Not to offend you, but, pray, may I ask, Where exactly does your Royal Highness hail from, by the way ?