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The courage to leave

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bramblesteen
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The courage to leave

Postby bramblesteen » Sun, 04 Mar 2012 12:53 pm

How do you do it? How do you look at your familiar surroundings, your friends and family, then pack up and leave to an alien place where you know absolutely no one and start completely afresh for the next few years of your life? Were you terrified at first, or determined to leave from the start? Were you having second thoughts when you boarded the plane with all your belongings?

I'm asking because I'm starting university in another country and the thought of it fills me up with complete terror. However, given the alternative of staying (which fills me up with a completely different kind of terror) I think going away would be the better choice har har.

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Postby sundaymorningstaple » Sun, 04 Mar 2012 1:00 pm

For me it was easy. I left everything. Just walked away. Walked through Changi airport with one bag, one briefcase and one diving helmet. I left the USof A for an adventure. I found one. In June I will have been in Asian for 29 years. Was it hard? Depends what you are walking away from. For some, if comfortable, it will be hard. For others who have had a rough couple of years or so, it may well be a lot easier.

Regrets? I've had some, but none that I'd change things if I could do them over though. Every man (figuratively) has to march to the beat of his own drum. Not his family's, not his friend's. Only his.

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zzm9980
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Postby zzm9980 » Sun, 04 Mar 2012 1:18 pm


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sundaymorningstaple
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Postby sundaymorningstaple » Sun, 04 Mar 2012 1:52 pm

Neither, cause I did it MY way! :wink:

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wannamove
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Re: The courage to leave

Postby wannamove » Sun, 04 Mar 2012 2:08 pm

bramblesteen wrote:How do you do it? How do you look at your familiar surroundings, your friends and family, then pack up and leave to an alien place where you know absolutely no one and start completely afresh for the next few years of your life? Were you terrified at first, or determined to leave from the start? Were you having second thoughts when you boarded the plane with all your belongings?

I'm asking because I'm starting university in another country and the thought of it fills me up with complete terror. However, given the alternative of staying (which fills me up with a completely different kind of terror) I think going away would be the better choice har har.


I moved 4 months ago and I had never been to Singapore before I moved. My magic mantra is to consider this as an adventure. As long as I think it as an adventure it is fun. But when I think it as my new life I freak out. Mind games - but hey they work for me. Everytime I have a second/third thought I remind myself it is an adventure and to be open to the experience. At the worst times of homesickness and missing the routines of my life in Houston, I tell myself it is just for 2 years.

I have given myself 2 years to make a decision so that I just do not rush out of a new country without given the new place, people and myself the time we need to settle in.

As I mentioned - thinking of the move as an adventure settles me down easily. That is my little secret.

Good luck

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carteki
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Postby carteki » Sun, 04 Mar 2012 2:13 pm

It really depends on how you see the place you're going to. Leaving home (if you're happy) is never easy, but sometimes life gives you an opportunity that you can't say "no" to.

You don't say where're you're from / going to, but look at it like an adventure. Look at it as an education. Singapore is a small place. You will be opening your mind and broadening your horizons in a way that is not possible if you just stay here.

There is nothing stopping you from coming home at the end of your experience - although be warned that some people have found going home difficult because they can no longer relate to the people they left behind.

You can keep in touch with friends and family back home on a regular basis with Skype and programs like FB allow easy sharing of your experiences in a "real time" basis.

No, its not easy - but lots of people have done it and even if all you learn is that you never want to leave home again then that is great. At least you did it.

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x9200
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Re: The courage to leave

Postby x9200 » Sun, 04 Mar 2012 8:22 pm

This probably depends mostly on your personality. At the time I came here less for the job and benefits and more as it was something very different. A bit like organizing everything by your own versus reallying on the packages from the tour organizer.

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Postby nutnut » Sun, 04 Mar 2012 8:26 pm

Dude, it's exciting, nuff said!

If you don't grab life by the balls and do what you want to do sometimes then you will forever be cursing yourself!
nutnut

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JR8
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Postby JR8 » Sun, 04 Mar 2012 9:56 pm

It's hard to comment without a context of where the OP is from, and where they are going to. Since they signed up here four years ago are they SGn? If so stepping out of Disneyland into the real world beyond is likely to be something of a shock...

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sundaymorningstaple
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Postby sundaymorningstaple » Sun, 04 Mar 2012 10:38 pm

I think the OP is local, truth be known. Having to leave their protected cocoon would be enough to scare most any of them, having to do without the support of mommy or the maid.

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Postby JR8 » Sun, 04 Mar 2012 11:01 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:I think the OP is local, truth be known. Having to leave their protected cocoon would be enough to scare most any of them, having to do without the support of mommy or the maid.


Ironic then that there is a dedicated government department (Contact Singapore) tasked with persuading those who have left to return.

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aster
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Re: The courage to leave

Postby aster » Mon, 05 Mar 2012 12:00 pm

bramblesteen wrote:I'm asking because I'm starting university in another country and the thought of it fills me up with complete terror.


And what country would that be, Afghanistan?

I know it's hard to leave the comfortable shell of Singapore behind, but to be terrified of going somewhere to study seems a bit excessive...

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Re: The courage to leave

Postby nakatago » Mon, 05 Mar 2012 12:10 pm

aster wrote:
bramblesteen wrote:I'm asking because I'm starting university in another country and the thought of it fills me up with complete terror.


And what country would that be, Afghanistan?

I know it's hard to leave the comfortable shell of Singapore behind, but to be terrified of going somewhere to study seems a bit excessive...


Trust me; some people have the smallest comfort zones. Some are petrified of even just going to a different city to study, what more in another country.

NB: not necessarily Singaporeans.

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x9200
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Postby x9200 » Mon, 05 Mar 2012 12:17 pm

I am petrified if I have to go to the IMM's Giant for shopping on a Sunday.

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Postby nakatago » Mon, 05 Mar 2012 12:18 pm

I am petrified to be in Lucky Plaza on a Sunday, especially in the afternoon.


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