Filial Piety Revisited

[sundaymorningstaple]

Frankly, I haven't seen anything that resembled an attack at all, I have seen responses that resembled counter-attacks though. Each of us should look into a mirror and be honest with ourselves to find out the problems here. I warrant, if one gives an honest appraisal to what they have seen and said, then the entire thread might just have taken a different tone. I personally find all here are a bit antagonistic and enjoy trying to "outdo" the other in their counter-attacks, especially when none are really warranted at all. Is it so difficult for adults to have adult discussions without resorting to childish taunts when we do not have a readily available response?

[x9200]

me mom's 84 & Dad's 85 and both are computer illiterate as well (I've wanted to try to teach mom, but she's afraid she would get into trouble with the gahmen as she hate's dem damnocrats in the Whitehouse.

Hmmm. My parents are roughly the same age (both above 80) and guess what, they refused to activate the Internet connection at their home. They've got all the infrastructure ready so just enough to call the operator and plug the RJ45 cable in. What I read between the lines is that they were afraid to be invigilated by the gahmen It ended up with installing a mobile broadband modem in the laptop with a prepaid card so I can top it up remotely once every six month or so.

[sundaymorningstaple]

Which is exactly what I do when I go back. I have a Virgin Mobile wireless dongle that I buy data cards for. While slower than full broadband, it's faster than dail-up.

[Eau2011]

me mom's 84 & Dad's 85 and both are computer illiterate as well (I've wanted to try to teach mom, but she's afraid she would get into trouble with the gahmen as she hate's dem damnocrats in the Whitehouse.

Hmmm. My parents are roughly the same age (both above 80) and guess what, they refused to activate the Internet connection at their home. They've got all the infrastructure ready so just enough to call the operator and plug the RJ45 cable in. What I read between the lines is that they were afraid to be invigilated by the gahmen It ended up with installing a mobile broadband modem in the laptop with a prepaid card so I can top it up remotely once every six month or so.

I'm using Skype to make phone calls to my parents. I topped up before always in EUR.

Now, I'm in SG, I checked it, there is no SGD as usable currency at Skype. Because I'd like to delete my EUR credit card in my account and add a local CC for payment.

Do you know how to do it Thanks! Or it does not make much sense to add a local CC because no SGD is used anyany?

[Wind In My Hair]

Why I had to point it out because I have read her opinions about children as a mother in other posts. Especially in the post about Tiananmen, because she's pro CCP's action, I have questioned her how she will feel if her children were shot or crushed to death (after I told the story of Tiananmen mothers, they had to keep silence every June 4th.). Her answer: "I might be for or against but I would'nt blame anyone for the death of my children who took up the challenge to fight for change".

有因才有果。

I understand how that comment could come across as heartless. Another possible interpretation is "if my child chose to protest knowing the risks and died in the process, I as a mother would grieve but not blame anyone". A Buddhist would more easily understand this attitude of acceptance and non-blame.

I'm not here to defend Anne, just pointing out that sometimes when a person's guard is already up, words and actions can be misinterpreted.

草木皆兵。

BTW, I was the last one who's been attacked by her in that "China" thread, before that, she attacked many others.

Well, if one has no respect for others, then he/she cannot expect respect from others. That's my motto. Fair enough?

I'm also not here to judge anyone. Everyone's words and actions are perfectly justified and fair from their own perspective. Nobody needs to explain their words and actions to me. Guess I'm just sticking my nose where it doesn't belong in the interest of world peace

四海之内，皆兄弟也。

[sundaymorningstaple]

me mom's 84 & Dad's 85 and both are computer illiterate as well (I've wanted to try to teach mom, but she's afraid she would get into trouble with the gahmen as she hate's dem damnocrats in the Whitehouse.

Hmmm. My parents are roughly the same age (both above 80) and guess what, they refused to activate the Internet connection at their home. They've got all the infrastructure ready so just enough to call the operator and plug the RJ45 cable in. What I read between the lines is that they were afraid to be invigilated by the gahmen It ended up with installing a mobile broadband modem in the laptop with a prepaid card so I can top it up remotely once every six month or so.

I'm using Skype to make phone calls to my parents. I topped up before always in EUR.

Now, I'm in SG, I checked it, there is no SGD as usable currency at Skype. Because I'd like to delete my EUR credit card in my account and add a local CC for payment.

Do you know how to do it Thanks! Or it does not make much sense to add a local CC because no SGD is used anyany?

I use my Singapore Credit Card to pay for it, but I do so behind PayPal. I use PayPal a lot as I am a collector and spend a fair amount on eBay. PayPal makes it easy as you can list several credit cards and then use one or the other as you see fit.

[Eau2011]

Why I had to point it out because I have read her opinions about children as a mother in other posts. Especially in the post about Tiananmen, because she's pro CCP's action, I have questioned her how she will feel if her children were shot or crushed to death (after I told the story of Tiananmen mothers, they had to keep silence every June 4th.). Her answer: "I might be for or against but I would'nt blame anyone for the death of my children who took up the challenge to fight for change".

有因才有果。

I understand how that comment could come across as heartless. Another possible interpretation is "if my child chose to protest knowing the risks and died in the process, I as a mother would grieve but not blame anyone". A Buddhist would more easily understand this attitude of acceptance and non-blame.

I'm not here to defend Anne, just pointing out that sometimes when a person's guard is already up, words and actions can be misinterpreted.

草木皆兵。

"person's guard is already up" or 草木皆兵，it's not the case this time. It was first time I read her post (without any bias) and I was just shocked.

And her opinion, accepting CCP's action with tanks crushing and killing innocent people (see her posts in "China" thread), is very well self-explained or supplemented for her attitude of human lives.

Yes a buddist maybe unstand it easily because they accept "destiny"命 no matter what happens, but in the modern society with morality and judiciary, the attitude of acceptance and non-blame is not encouraged, I guess neither is encouraged in SG.

Of cause, an exception, it's always encouraged and preferred under any dictatorship.

[Eau2011]

Hmmm. My parents are roughly the same age (both above 80) and guess what, they refused to activate the Internet connection at their home. They've got all the infrastructure ready so just enough to call the operator and plug the RJ45 cable in. What I read between the lines is that they were afraid to be invigilated by the gahmen It ended up with installing a mobile broadband modem in the laptop with a prepaid card so I can top it up remotely once every six month or so.

I'm using Skype to make phone calls to my parents. I topped up before always in EUR.

Now, I'm in SG, I checked it, there is no SGD as usable currency at Skype. Because I'd like to delete my EUR credit card in my account and add a local CC for payment.

Do you know how to do it Thanks! Or it does not make much sense to add a local CC because no SGD is used anyany?

I use my Singapore Credit Card to pay for it, but I do so behind PayPal. I use PayPal a lot as I am a collector and spend a fair amount on eBay. PayPal makes it easy as you can list several credit cards and then use one or the other as you see fit.

I have PayPal account in D, but I guess I have to open a new one because the connected bank should be a local one?

[x9200]

Filial piety could mean unconditional submission, but not necessarily. For example, I could quarrel with my parents about what I want but in the end grudgingly do what they want instead. Or they could ask nothing of me and not demand submission at all, and yet I feel an unspoken obligation to do what's good for them rather than what's good for me.

Clear. I actually meant something like this. It is never black and white. Perhaps Western people are more rebellious in everyday social interactions so we more easily say no. I used to know one Chinese couple and heard many stories from her what she had to do to satisfy her MinL. No Western woman I know would accept this kind of treatment.

[Eau2011]

BTW, I was the last one who's been attacked by her in that "China" thread, before that, she attacked many others.

Well, if one has no respect for others, then he/she cannot expect respect from others. That's my motto. Fair enough?

I'm also not here to judge anyone. Everyone's words and actions are perfectly justified and fair from their own perspective. Nobody needs to explain their words and actions to me. Guess I'm just sticking my nose where it doesn't belong in the interest of world peace

四海之内，皆兄弟也。

四海之内，皆兄弟也。It's really good intention and I do at the very beginning when I meet a stranger, and I know人之初, 性本善。I believe there is natural kindness in one. But if I don't share the same view of value with another, we maybe only strangers, not bro's and sis'.

But we also say 白话: 一个巴掌拍不响。 If one party of two isn't interested in peace, I guess peace will not function here.

[x9200]

I'm using Skype to make phone calls to my parents. I topped up before always in EUR.

Now, I'm in SG, I checked it, there is no SGD as usable currency at Skype. Because I'd like to delete my EUR credit card in my account and add a local CC for payment.

Do you know how to do it Thanks! Or it does not make much sense to add a local CC because no SGD is used anyany?

I pay right now in US$ and earlier in EUR using all the time SG cards. I think it does not matter. What you lose on the currency exchange is rather negligible.
You just go to the payment settings and later chose payment mode where you can add/modify a CC/paypal with change payment mode. I use the autocharge option.

[x9200]

I have PayPal account in D, but I guess I have to open a new one because the connected bank should be a local one?

I do not think so. I use my SG paypal account to pay in Europe, US and locally and actually I have more often some strange situations locally: I have 2 cards defined (amex and master) and I can use them as I want and interchangeably worldwide but some Singapore payments disable the amex option. Weird enough this is amex SG card.

[tyianchang]

I mean, imagine getting such returns from your children - all of which goes without saying. A good culture to continue?

Lastly, I've been trying to stay out of this but I'm getting sick of so many posters making Anneteoh / Tyianchang a punching bag. .

It's because of the personal nature of fights on other threads that her original post was taken in a more negative light than need have been. Just my view.

While Anne / Tyianchang has done her share of lashing out, I'm sure I would have been equally combative if I felt attacked by so many posters all at once. At the same time, if the lady feels inclined to accept some unsolicited advice, I suggest retreating a little and ceasing the personal attacks. You make many good points and once the swords and shields are laid down and the clanging quietens, perhaps everyone will hear better what you are saying.

Let's just blame Confucius for filial piety in the first place, and let him try to make amends with some of his other writings:

"The heart of a wise man should resemble a mirror, which reflects every object without being sullied by any."

"Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves."

Sigh, another long post. I must be getting old.

Ah... this feels like being in Confucius' prosecution court!
WIMH and SMS, you make my participation in this forum worthwhile. I'm truly sorry the need to defend me rests in your just hands and erudite words; which, after a few attempts, I personally found to be a pointless chore as those posters are hell bent on distortions and rudeness. I can just imagine the audacity of someone who doesn't fully understand the subtleties of a language to start blackening another poster with her inane excuses to strut her own ego trips.
It doesn't interest me to read or bother with them It was getting tedious to deal with intentional misconceptions and extreme rudeness. But I take such bizzare posts pragmatically as that involves me in character study as well. I thought people in this distinctive forum know that greatness does not come from scheming diatribes, that are personalised attacks; that rather throw a reflection back on their own inadequacies of character. Much said.

Yes, I do enjoy some bantering drollery and witticisms which is what makes this forum sparkle; still one has to watch the arrogance and the poor efforts of those who just resort to plain insults e.g. for Plavt who issued me a warning before I'd like to pose this batch for his platitude -
drole, drolled, drollery in discussions
or jokes, jests and rubbish.

WIMH, thank you for quoting the sentences with " getting such returns ..." I had previously pointed out that the word 'returns' is meant in the context of parents being taken out on holidays, weekend dinners and even given monthly allowances as a statement of love from their grown up children which is unanimously recognised in our family as FP. I would treat 'honour and respect' as less than love. I used 'returns' as a befitting word for children rewarding their parents with the earlier sacrifices and love given to them when they were children. Some misread that as a purely financial term to do with banks. But one would expect a free and open forum like this SG one to have posters ranging from a wide range of abilities and skills.

My personal attacks ? That was indeed retaliations to unprovoked rudeness and insults. That's the British side of me that do not equivocate and turn a deaf ear to the assault of bullies. They were, at most, meant to be funny, a little lampooning and nothing serious, except for developing a thicker skin and a greater sense of humour.

I hope I'm not making you feel old! How about dressing up as a bionic woman to hand over a statment from me to Confucius ,
" Dear Sir,
I have a protest about your teaching that virtuous women obey their husbands and parents -in- law unconditionally, implying that women should repress their creativity and capability to please the ordained superiors in your family structure.
And I have a suggestion that you make amendments in ..."?
I'd love a series of photoshots on this!

BTW, when I 'm in SG in April, dare I take you out for iced tehtarik in the kopitiam? Have a great day.

[Eau2011]

I have PayPal account in D, but I guess I have to open a new one because the connected bank should be a local one?

I do not think so. I use my SG paypal account to pay in Europe, US and locally and actually I have more often some strange situations locally: I have 2 cards defined (amex and master) and I can use them as I want and interchangeably worldwide but some Singapore payments disable the amex option. Weird enough this is amex SG card.

That's great to know that I don't have to open a new Paypal account.

I guess it's like iTune store that you just can buy things with an account with a local address and a local credit card.

That's why I went to ebay to buy some coupons so that I can buy films from US iTune store, using my local German account and CC it does not work.

[Eau2011]

Ah... this feels like being in Confucius' prosecution court!
WIMH and SMS, you make my participation in this forum worthwhile. I'm truly sorry the need to defend me rests in your just hands and erudite words; which, after a few attempts, I personally found to be a pointless chore as those posters are hell bent on distortions and rudeness. I can just imagine the audacity of someone who doesn't fully understand the subtleties of a language to start blackening another poster with her inane excuses to strut her own ego trips.

It doesn't interest me to read or bother with them It was getting tedious to deal with intentional misconceptions and extreme rudeness. But I take such bizzare posts pragmatically as that involves me in character study as well. I thought people in this distinctive forum know that greatness does not come from scheming diatribes, that are personalised attacks; that rather throw a reflection back on their own inadequacies of character. Much said.
.

Your own ego-trip? See below.
As well for me it is one of those bizzare posts pragmatically as that involves me in character study.
I do see here one's own inadequacies of character.

What's this - always telling me what my beliefs should be???

Hmmm... considering that I have made exactly two posts here, I find your term 'always' somewhat wanting.

The larger issue, however, is your assertion that I am telling you what your beliefs should be?

Wherever did you get this cockamamie idea? I have stated what I think to be the situation. How in the world did you interpret that I am telling you what your beliefs should be? Unless of course, your psyche is not very integrated, in which case I can understand how you might perceive my opinion as something being forced upon you.

Having done a lot of work in the area of psychological integration, I'd be more than happy to discuss with you steps you might take to become more whole; otherwise, you will spend your life, with various parts of your conscious and subconscious stuck, way back when, with predictable results... such as your interpretation that I am telling you what your beliefs should be.

Sorry, you don't impress me as one with scholarly detachment, rather an occasional need for a primal scream. I find your aggression disturbing for a psychologist and thank you, I dig Jung but you're probably Freudian. Schmuck, whatever that means. I am as predictable as your stereotyping can stretch; but really I have sensed your emotional intelligence, so just be happy with yourself and let the others find their own paths. Have you lived and searched in India? But all things considered, you're doing quite well; just don't try to sell by telling people they'rve got something missing like a front tooth when it's there. Hehehe. Have a nice day.

This one is to JR8

You really must learn to talk and not go nitpicking all the time. It does make you look so silly when you're really not that ridiculous you know. Goodbye.