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Blondes have more fun

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sundaymorningstaple
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Blondes have more fun

Postby sundaymorningstaple » Thu, 09 Dec 2010 8:58 am

An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee.

After sitting there for a while, he yells to the waiter, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke ?'

The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, 'Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:

1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.

2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.

3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.

4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight-lifter.

5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.

'Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke ?'

The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, 'No... not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.’

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sundaymorningstaple
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Postby sundaymorningstaple » Thu, 09 Dec 2010 8:59 am

I just had a call from a Charity asking me to donate some of my old clothes
To the starving people throughout the world.

I told them to Bugger off!! Anybody who fits into my old clothes isn't starving!!

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Wind In My Hair
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Postby Wind In My Hair » Thu, 09 Dec 2010 12:31 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:I just had a call from a Charity asking me to donate some of my old clothes
To the starving people throughout the world.

I told them to Bugger off!! Anybody who fits into my old clothes isn't starving!!

Boomz!

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Saint
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Postby Saint » Thu, 09 Dec 2010 12:40 pm

My girlfriend is always complaining that I push her around and talk behind her back.
I said "it ain't my fault you are in a wheelchair"

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aargon
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Postby aargon » Sun, 19 Dec 2010 12:25 am

blondes have more fun? just what are you trying to say SMS?
Everybody was KungFu Fighting.....

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Postby Plavt » Sun, 19 Dec 2010 12:51 am

aargon wrote:blondes have more fun? just what are you trying to say SMS?


Do your realize which section this is? :roll:

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Postby aargon » Sun, 19 Dec 2010 9:09 am

Plavt wrote:
aargon wrote:blondes have more fun? just what are you trying to say SMS?


Do your realize which section this is? :roll:


Yes :roll:
Everybody was KungFu Fighting.....

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sundaymorningstaple
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Postby sundaymorningstaple » Sun, 19 Dec 2010 10:50 am

aargon wrote:blondes have more fun?


There are only 4 words, which word is giving you problems? :lol:

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Postby ksl » Sun, 19 Dec 2010 3:40 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:
aargon wrote:blondes have more fun?


There are only 4 words, which word is giving you problems? :lol:
No offence but I think aargon has difficulty understanding certain types of humour. he's obviously not British or American, so he doesn't actually get the right message

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aargon
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Postby aargon » Sun, 19 Dec 2010 5:26 pm

ksl wrote:
sundaymorningstaple wrote:
aargon wrote:blondes have more fun?


There are only 4 words, which word is giving you problems? :lol:
No offence but I think aargon has difficulty understanding certain types of humour. he's obviously not British or American, so he doesn't actually get the right message



ITS A JOKE - hence in the joke, rubbish section

Its like SMS saying " its hot today" and me saying " what exactly are you trying to say SMS"....... excuse my dry antipodean humour :mrgreen:
Everybody was KungFu Fighting.....

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wasssaaabiii
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Over at the gay bar...

Postby wasssaaabiii » Mon, 20 Dec 2010 3:15 am

This guy walks into a bar and two steps in, he realizes it's a gay bar. "But what the heck", he says, "I really want a drink."

When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the customer, "What's the name of your penis?" The customer says, "Look, I'm not into any of that. All I want is a drink".

The gay waiter says, "I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell me the name of your penis. Mine for instance is called Nike, for the slogan Just Do It.

That guy down at the end of the bar calls his Snickers, because 'It really Satisfies."

The customer looks dumbfounded so the bartender tells him he will give
him a second to think it over. So the customer asks the man sitting to his left, who is sipping on a beer, "Hey bud, what's the name of your penis?" The man looks back and says with a smile, "TIMEX." The thirsty customer asks, "Why Timex?" The fella proudly replies, "Cause it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin!"

A little shaken, the customer turns to the fella on his right, who is sipping a fruity Margarita and says, "So, what do you call your penis?" The man turns to him and proudly exclaims, "FORD, because Quality is Job 1."

Then he adds, "Have you driven a Ford, lately?" Even more shaken, the
customer has to think for a moment before he comes up with a name for his penis. Finally, he turns to the bartender and exclaims, "The name of my penis is Secret. Now give me my beer."

The bartender begins to pour the customer a beer, but with a puzzled look asks, "Why Secret?" The customer says, "Because it's STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!"

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JR8
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Postby JR8 » Mon, 20 Dec 2010 3:57 am



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