Socialising with the locals

[nwpz]

there is some negativity about the locals, is SG even worth the move?

[x9200]

This is a standard question. Better get use to it.

u serious? I hope not... LOL....

I am serious. For majority of Singaporeans you are worth as much as you earn so this kind of question is natural esp. for lower educated ppl. This is a money culture.

[sundaymorningstaple]

there is some negativity about the locals, is SG even worth the move?

It's not negativity, it's just a healthy dose of realism. It's sounds negative to you, but once you get here, you will find that all is driven by money here. From births to weddings to funerals and all dealings in between. In fact, when I first came here and to a great extent today, a marriage proposal goes something like "Let's apply for an HDB flat together" Often a marriage is postponed until they have secured financing for the Flat. After a while, you learn to automatically inflate your earnings just enough to impress OR deflate you earnings in order to envoke pity and maybe a discount.

If you go into any Kopitiam (coffeeshop) you won't hear anything at all unless it concerns money. Rules are meant to be broken by the locals, and it's not called a FINE city for nothing. Social Mores aren't much more that a westerners pipe dream, even after 35 years of courtesy campaigns unless the government slaps a heavy fine if caught. But, it's all part and parcel to the enigma that is this little city-state just north of the equator. Love it or hate it, it's still an experience where things actually work and while we all love to diss it, much is to be said in it's favour as long as we can get past our own preconceived notions how things are supposed to be. People here said I must really hate this place, but it's not so much the place that I hate, it's the other place that I love that holds my heart. I'm here just like everybody else if they are truely honest, I came here for the money but I stayed on after the money slowed to a trickle because I created a family unit here. With the young ones almost all out of the nest, I'm now ready to go back to my roots.

Come. But be prepared to accept that all is not and will not be what you think it should be. Everybody and every place has to have equal parts of yin & yang. You'll get used to it, or you will go home. But to not give it a try is cutting your own throat. You may love it once you accept it.

[hey_smile]

This is a standard question. Better get use to it.

u serious? I hope not... LOL....

I find this very intriguing... nobody asked how much I earn.. so either I have the really poor face or the really rich face. Those that asked vaguely were my close friends only.

But I must agree people here are very status-conscious, as what sundaymorningstaple described. It's just a culture that was instilled in the young ones in their school days. Already at their age, they are segregated into "streams" (what you call? Express or something?), and graded for their performance in every aspect. But who to blame? It's the effects of a meritocratic society. Subtly, everything has a "class" here. You have the HDBs, condos and the landed. You have the JCs, polys and ITEs. You have the MNCs, GLCs and SMEs. Even primary schools are segregated based on their PSLE performance.... and parents take the extra miles to get their children into the top ones.... It's all imbued by the government. A country with no other resources, that is how they chose to motivate people to work hard by setting these ideals. So in the end, people seem less concerned if someone sacrificed his family, or a woman much of her youth, to achieve all these. But in recent years, the government has put some focus back on the family, and quality of life - not for long before the IR comes, and heck care about the family again. Oh btw, that's our new casino.

And in case you are lost by the acronyms I used :-

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Si ... reviations

[nwpz]

cheers sms. I figured that if I don't appreciate SG then I will try Malaysia instead. And if that doesn't work either I will go to Aussy land. Hopefully I will find my place in the sun.

I have heared good things about the malaysians, and only bad things about the singaporeans ...

[green_field]

I find this very intriguing... nobody asked how much I earn.. so either I have the really poor face or the really rich face. Those that asked vaguely were my close friends only.

But I must agree people here are very status-conscious, as what sundaymorningstaple described. It's just a culture that was instilled in the young ones in their school days. Already at their age, they are segregated into "streams" (what you call? Express or something?), and graded for their performance in every aspect. But who to blame? It's the effects of a meritocratic society. Subtly, everything has a "class" here. You have the HDBs, condos and the landed. You have the JCs, polys and ITEs. You have the MNCs, GLCs and SMEs. Even primary schools are segregated based on their PSLE performance.... and parents take the extra miles to get their children into the top ones.... It's all imbued by the government. A country with no other resources, that is how they chose to motivate people to work hard by setting these ideals. So in the end, people seem less concerned if someone sacrificed his family, or a woman much of her youth, to achieve all these. But in recent years, the government has put some focus back on the family, and quality of life - not for long before the IR comes, and heck care about the family again. Oh btw, that's our new casino

I guess the "class thing" is everywhere, not only in Singapore. But don't you find it is rude to ask people how much they are earning, esp after people already politely reject to answer. The worst is that it comes from the guys who tried to date me. LOL. They are not low-educated. I assume uni grad is not classified as low education. I think it is not the education issue here. Maybe cultural or EQ issue? haha. Or the male here not very sensitive.

I had an interesting encounter during the school time. Till now still cannot forget! . I call it cultural shock.
We were all freshmen attending the Orientation week at the school there. I followed a group of seniors that brought us to Sentosa for some games. The group had some local girls. They all kinda ignored a guy who was a bit chubby and not very cool . All busy talking to the tanned-tall-muscular guys just out of army . Of cos I talked to him and everyone else.
Then, when we needed to go to town for dinner, it turned out that the chubby guy was driving some fancy car. "Fancy car" because I guess so! cannot remember what was that, but must be because... all the girls suddenly ran to talk to him. haha! The car only had 4 seats, so they all like "fighting" to get into. At the dinner, even more hilarious, it was only him and all the girls at 1 table, while all the previously "cool" guys were completely ignored.
At the end of the dinner, again, the girls wanted to take his car back.

I was too shocked after seeing the whole thing. Their attitude just changed completely almost instantly after seeing the guy's car. LOL.

Money is important. I work my ass out everyday for it so I know it is important. But not to that extend right? Or I am just too naive. LOL.

[poodlek]

I had an interesting encounter during the school time. Till now still cannot forget! . I call it cultural shock.
We were all freshmen attending the Orientation week at the school there. I followed a group of seniors that brought us to Sentosa for some games. The group had some local girls. They all kinda ignored a guy who was a bit chubby and not very cool . All busy talking to the tanned-tall-muscular guys just out of army . Of cos I talked to him and everyone else.
Then, when we needed to go to town for dinner, it turned out that the chubby guy was driving some fancy car. "Fancy car" because I guess so! cannot remember what was that, but must be because... all the girls suddenly ran to talk to him. haha! The car only had 4 seats, so they all like "fighting" to get into. At the dinner, even more hilarious, it was only him and all the girls at 1 table, while all the previously "cool" guys were completely ignored.
At the end of the dinner, again, the girls wanted to take his car back.

This reminded me of a Colombian guy my sister encountered once.

Dude: "Girrr, you gotta BIG BUTT!!"
My sister: "Pardon me???"
Dude: "It's so BEAUTIFUL. I LOVE it."

Everyone has their priorities.

[nakatago]

I have heared good things about the malaysians, and only bad things about the singaporeans ...

You need to have a word with Vaucluse then.

[green_field]

This reminded me of a Colombian guy my sister encountered once.

Dude: "Girrr, you gotta BIG BUTT!!"
My sister: "Pardon me???"
Dude: "It's so BEAUTIFUL. I LOVE it."

Everyone has their priorities.

of cos along the way I meet lots of other kinds of locals. But then I still cannot forget this story. haha... becos I still hear ppl asking me how much I earn. Weird! lol.

[curiousgeorge]

I was lucky in that before I moved here I visited for 2wks/month and got to know people slowly on those visits. I would get invited for dinner & drinks will colleagues or sometimes invite people to join me if I felt I needed company.

Smokers always have it easy, meet many people in smoking corners! Also motorcyclists will always spend time to talk to other motorcyclists about their bikes and travels...surely you must have some interest that will get you interacting with people?

How would you make friends in your home country if you moved to a different city? Same here!

Otherwise, if you go down the back streets of Geyland you will find lots of ladies willing to get to know you.

[x9200]

of cos along the way I meet lots of other kinds of locals. But then I still cannot forget this story. haha... And I still hear ppl asking me how much I earn. Weird! lol.

So how much do you actually earn?

[green_field]

So how much do you actually earn?

[hey_smile]

Yes, the class thing is every where... but I just think it's more prominent here. Maybe it's such an close society, people tend to observe and compare with one another. But I'd think asking people's salary is rude. They must be really insecure...

Anyway, I thought a real fancy car would have 2-seats ??? I got schooled here as well but that scene you just shared...well you should've changed your friends...

They should have just borrowed the chubby guy's car and drove off with the muscular tanned guy

I guess the "class thing" is everywhere, not only in Singapore. But don't you find it is rude to ask people how much they are earning, esp after people already politely reject to answer. The worst is that it comes from the guys who tried to date me. LOL. They are not low-educated. I assume uni grad is not classified as low education. I think it is not the education issue here. Maybe cultural or EQ issue? haha. Or the male here not very sensitive.

I had an interesting encounter during the school time. Till now still cannot forget! . I call it cultural shock.
We were all freshmen attending the Orientation week at the school there. I followed a group of seniors that brought us to Sentosa for some games. The group had some local girls. They all kinda ignored a guy who was a bit chubby and not very cool . All busy talking to the tanned-tall-muscular guys just out of army . Of cos I talked to him and everyone else.
Then, when we needed to go to town for dinner, it turned out that the chubby guy was driving some fancy car. "Fancy car" because I guess so! cannot remember what was that, but must be because... all the girls suddenly ran to talk to him. haha! The car only had 4 seats, so they all like "fighting" to get into. At the dinner, even more hilarious, it was only him and all the girls at 1 table, while all the previously "cool" guys were completely ignored.
At the end of the dinner, again, the girls wanted to take his car back.

I was too shocked after seeing the whole thing. Their attitude just changed completely almost instantly after seeing the guy's car. LOL.

Money is important. I work my ass out everyday for it so I know it is important. But not to that extend right? Or I am just too naive. LOL.

[sundaymorningstaple]

Anyway, I thought a real fancy car would have 2-seats ???

[green_field]

Anyway, I thought a real fancy car would have 2-seats ???

discounted version of the society because we were only students back then. LOL. So no need 2 seats/2doors to attract girls hehe