Singapore Expats Forum

Invited to a Locals House for Dinner

Discuss about the latest news & interesting topics, real life experience or other out of topic discussions with locals & expatriates in Singapore.

februus
Regular
Regular
Posts: 83
Joined: Fri, 09 Apr 2010
Location: Bukit Batok, Singapore

Invited to a Locals House for Dinner

Postby februus » Thu, 22 Jul 2010 11:50 am

Have been invited to a local's house for dinner next week.

I have found lots of ettiquette information on here, but specifically was interested to know what signs should I look for that I have outstayed my welcome or it's time for me to go?

sensible please - at least to start ;)

User avatar
x9200
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 9164
Joined: Mon, 07 Sep 2009
Location: Singapore

Re: Invited to a Locals House for Dinner

Postby x9200 » Thu, 22 Jul 2010 2:34 pm

februus wrote:Have been invited to a local's house for dinner next week.

I have found lots of ettiquette information on here, but specifically was interested to know what signs should I look for that I have outstayed my welcome or it's time for me to go?

sensible please - at least to start ;)

Honestly I don't think the locals are here that different. Just use common sense. If they change their outfits to pajamas then you probably overstayed quite a bit :)

User avatar
sundaymorningstaple
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 34263
Joined: Thu, 11 Nov 2004
Location: Still Fishing!
Contact:

Postby sundaymorningstaple » Thu, 22 Jul 2010 3:04 pm

With the exception of the live-in MiL who will probably be in PJ's the whole time anyway. :P

User avatar
Saint
Director
Director
Posts: 3535
Joined: Thu, 16 Jun 2005
Location: The Juban Stand, Boat Quay
Contact:

Postby Saint » Thu, 22 Jul 2010 3:48 pm

No different to anywhere else really, only thing to be aware of is what time to arrive. If they say 7pm and you arrive at 7pm the local host will be very shocked!

User avatar
Mad Scientist
Director
Director
Posts: 3447
Joined: Thu, 03 Dec 2009
Location: TIMBUKTU

Postby Mad Scientist » Thu, 22 Jul 2010 6:28 pm

Depends actually if your host is Chinese , they will eat and drink till late night. Indians maybe. Malay definitely there is a time limit.
Usually around 10 to 11 pm.
Remove your shoes when entering the house.
Most of them will be very obliging. BUT if you see A BIG YAWN IN YOUR FACE, then time to go :D
The positive thinker sees the invisible, feels the intangible, and achieves the impossible.Yahoo !!!

local lad
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 166
Joined: Tue, 13 Sep 2005

Postby local lad » Fri, 23 Jul 2010 10:40 am

No Ba-kua ( barbequed pork package ) to Malay family :P

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Re: Invited to a Locals House for Dinner

Postby JR8 » Fri, 23 Jul 2010 10:48 am

x9200 wrote:
februus wrote:Have been invited to a local's house for dinner next week.

I have found lots of ettiquette information on here, but specifically was interested to know what signs should I look for that I have outstayed my welcome or it's time for me to go?

sensible please - at least to start ;)

Honestly I don't think the locals are here that different. Just use common sense. If they change their outfits to pajamas then you probably overstayed quite a bit :)



Ha ha!

Maybe they start in pajamas lah, and when they 's, shower and shave' and change into business suits, then it is time to leave :)

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Postby JR8 » Fri, 23 Jul 2010 11:09 am

Other thing I'd say is stop this uber-deference (condescending) pussy footing around.

Go and have dinner FFS. If you don't know when to leave someones place, an internet forum is not really going to teach you social skills is it?

Get over yourself.

februus
Regular
Regular
Posts: 83
Joined: Fri, 09 Apr 2010
Location: Bukit Batok, Singapore

Postby februus » Fri, 23 Jul 2010 1:10 pm

JR8 wrote:Other thing I'd say is stop this uber-deference (condescending) pussy footing around.

Go and have dinner FFS. If you don't know when to leave someones place, an internet forum is not really going to teach you social skills is it?

Get over yourself.


It's OK, I don't need help from someone prepared to juxtapose deference and condescension and suggest that they mean the same thing.

That one is meant to be condescending.

Thanks for taking the time though....

Girl_Next_Door
Reporter
Reporter
Posts: 612
Joined: Thu, 28 Aug 2008

Postby Girl_Next_Door » Fri, 23 Jul 2010 2:03 pm

Something to note is, if it is a traditional chinese family, bringing a bottle of wine might not be what they are expecting.

A can of abalone might be more welcome. :lol:

User avatar
x9200
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 9164
Joined: Mon, 07 Sep 2009
Location: Singapore

Postby x9200 » Fri, 23 Jul 2010 2:21 pm

Girl_Next_Door wrote:Something to note is, if it is a traditional chinese family, bringing a bottle of wine might not be what they are expecting.

A can of abalone might be more welcome. :lol:

Typically no worry, the only difference as far as I can tell is that they do not drink with Angmohs for the possibility of getting wasted and face-losing reasons but they have no objections towards this kind of beverages in general.
Funny but understandable thing that we as the foreigners are often much more sensitive and aware of the local etiquette than locals themselves.

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Postby JR8 » Fri, 23 Jul 2010 5:22 pm

februus wrote:
JR8 wrote:Other thing I'd say is stop this uber-deference (condescending) pussy footing around.

Go and have dinner FFS. If you don't know when to leave someones place, an internet forum is not really going to teach you social skills is it?

Get over yourself.


It's OK, I don't need help from someone prepared to juxtapose deference and condescension and suggest that they mean the same thing.

That one is meant to be condescending.

Thanks for taking the time though....



When the lady of the house points and hysterically shouts 'You go home!!!' it is time to think of leaving.

Hope that helps.

(Let us know if you have any more of these fun questions.)

User avatar
ksl
Governor
Governor
Posts: 6005
Joined: Mon, 19 Jul 2004
Location: Singapore
Contact:

Postby ksl » Wed, 28 Jul 2010 1:20 am

x9200 wrote:
Girl_Next_Door wrote:Something to note is, if it is a traditional chinese family, bringing a bottle of wine might not be what they are expecting.

A can of abalone might be more welcome. :lol:

Typically no worry, the only difference as far as I can tell is that they do not drink with Angmohs for the possibility of getting wasted and face-losing reasons but they have no objections towards this kind of beverages in general.
Funny but understandable thing that we as the foreigners are often much more sensitive and aware of the local etiquette than locals themselves.


Typically no worry, the only difference as far as I can tell is that they do not drink with Angmohs for the possibility of getting wasted and face-losing reasons but they have no objections towards this kind of beverages in general
I find quite the opposite if the bottle comes out, it could be a long session, depends on the character involved, many Chinese can hold their own when it comes to a drinking session.

Funny but understandable thing that we as the foreigners are often much more sensitive and aware of the local etiquette than locals themselves
Agree with this 100%, though etiquette can be a problem for many that are not used to it, play safe and follow the leaders, though don't pick your nose, they may laugh at that one! :lol:

Something I don't like doing is taking my shoes off, unless there are brand new slippers, walking in barefoot may lead to all sorts of feet disease from athletes foot to veruca's my daughter picked up verucas spread pretty damned quick too, though i managed to burn them off.

Floors are far from clean, even though they look spotless, so be warned, most are just unaware of the consequences

User avatar
x9200
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 9164
Joined: Mon, 07 Sep 2009
Location: Singapore

Postby x9200 » Wed, 28 Jul 2010 1:47 pm

Perhaps this is not entirely the angmoh thing but seems to be a factor. On numerous occasions my local colleagues (from different work places) clearly refrained from drinking any alcohol with no obvious reasons while myself and other Agmohs were just enjoying a pint or two. The only local person I spent time with sipping some beer in a completely relaxed, natural way was my motorbike mechanic. Duno, could be something wrong with me.

User avatar
Saint
Director
Director
Posts: 3535
Joined: Thu, 16 Jun 2005
Location: The Juban Stand, Boat Quay
Contact:

Postby Saint » Wed, 28 Jul 2010 2:01 pm

x9200 wrote:Perhaps this is not entirely the angmoh thing but seems to be a factor. On numerous occasions my local colleagues (from different work places) clearly refrained from drinking any alcohol with no obvious reasons while myself and other Agmohs were just enjoying a pint or two. The only local person I spent time with sipping some beer in a completely relaxed, natural way was my motorbike mechanic. Duno, could be something wrong with me.


The main resaon is that they are scared stiff of trying to drink with ang mohs as they know they will end up a dribbling mess on the floor in the corner!


  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Return to “General Discussions”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests