Direct flight with 1 and 3 year old? Or go for a layover?

[ciaopescao]

Hi there,
we are arriving soon and planning flights. At least we are in Business Class, but my husband and I are in disagreement.

I want to fly a long leg (10 -12 hours) then stop for at least a night in Japan or UAE or some such. He thinks we should go straight to SG. The flight is from NY - SG (19 hours in the air alone).

My concern is the 1 year old. He won't sit still and wants to wobble around everywhere. The flight home from the UK at Xmas was rough - never slept and couldn't walk yet but hated being held, etc. I should add that I don't love to fly but that wouldn't sway my opinion - worried more for the kids.

WWYD? Or better yet - what have you already tested?

Another question - carseat on the plane for the one year old if we are in business? We usually do so he sleeps better but not sure as this is very posh for me
TIA!

[BigSis]

I think I'd do the whole thing in one go and get it over with. It is a long time but better to have 19 hours of stress than a couple of days of it (and he might be unsettled for longer if you stayed in a hotel half way). If he wants to walk around for 10 hours then you'll have to let him do that - most people will be asleep or with their headphones plugged in and they won't even know he's there if he's happier toddling around. Better to let him do that than get frustrated and cry.

Try not to get too stressed yourselves, they can sense it and I think it makes babies worse if their parents are on edge.

Good luck with it

[cbavasi]

Personally I liken traveling with children on long haul flights to childbirth... it's not pleasant, it can be horrific at stages - but it does come to an end (eventually). I've done my fair share of Sing - LAX and Sing - UK with kids both non-stop and having a short layover in Japan and though it's about 5 hours shy of the Sing - NY trip - if you are going that far just do the whole trip in one go - especially if you are lucky enough to be traveling business. If you try and break it up - you'll still have the same drama of checking in, waiting around, jet-lagged kids... etc. Also, business class has the comfort of sky beds so your 1 year old can stretch out. In my opinion - if you have purchased the extra seat I would bring the car seat for the 1 year old b/c once they are "locked in" it's hard for them to squirm around and work their way out... nothing worse than not having the car seat and then you are stuck with them on your lap for take off and landing if they are restless.
Provided the aircraft is not entirely full the crew should be able to store the car seat on an empty seat in the back when you are not using (but may want to check before with the ground staff).
You may be really surprised and have a seamless trip with the baby. I had a horrific flight with my then 10 month old (so much I thought about stabbing someone with my plastic utensil - yes, in coach - to ground the plane)... and had sweats about traveling again - only to have no problems on the return.
Good luck!!! Just try and remember it's only one day

[manneymo]

For your sanity and the childrens, I would defintley opt for the layover. We flew from Vancouver Canada to Hong Kong (13 hours) with my 1 year old and it wasnt as bad as I was expecting. We then flew the following evening to Sg (3.5 hrs).
I would also check your airline because I know that many airlines do not allow carseats in Business class.
We flew economy with carseat, and we just of course brought lots of activities, and also took a flight that was later in the day so he would be in the air for his night time. He did sleep, but not very comfortably of course. Also made a lil bed on the floor in front of our seats and he got to strech out and sleep. It was tight but it worked.
I knew of a couple that paid for one seat in first class, and 2 seats in economy. The hubby would get a few hour rest in first class, then would swap out with the wife in the back with the child to give her a quiet break. Maybe purchase 2 tix in business for the 3 yrold and a parent, then 2 tix in economy for the 1 yr old and the parent? Hope this helps.
Whatever u decided good luck!

[sundaymorningstaple]

I flew the trip from Singapore to Washington DC numerous time when my kids were young starting with my daughter (1st one) when she was only 3 months old. We did the flights about once a year up till my son (5 years younger) was around 3. We've always flown without layovers (other than the 1.5 hr type in HK or Taipei or Narita and SF or LAX or O'Hara. The kids, if you plan ahead were, for us, never a problem. Get it done in one fell swoop. That way, if they were troubled during the flight, you won't have to subject them to it a day later as they will remember and you'll have problems from the get-go. Better to have 'em grumpy for 26-28 hours than for 36-42 hours. You'll be better for it as well especially considering your biorhythms will already be out after the first leg and then having more problems on the second leg, well, lets say, you tempers may be a wee bit shorter as well.

[KindClare]

Unless you do a 2-day layover, I'd try to get all done at once. We do the "bed on the floor" thing for my 4 year old and she sleeps great. The 1 year old is a challenge - I would definitely say carseat as it is a bit of a comfort to them to be somewhere familiar. It is IMO completely unpredictable if they are going to be a screaming mess or no trouble. Not really much you can do either way (apart from Benadryl or something else that will make you feel like a bad mom) Whole Foods do sell natural sleep aids that are safe for kids. I've never tried them but I did buy them once - just in case. (Bad mom)

[daytripper65]

We used to take that direct flight all the time, until they cut out the economy class. My husband's company doesn't pay for our flights home so now we alternate between the layover in frankfurt and, last time, a different airline I miss the direct flights. For me the process of getting off the plane, waiting around,/chasing them around, checking in, re-boarding, the extra take-off and landing is so much more hassle, especially with kids, than just buzzing here in one go. I haven't had to resort to the benadryl, but I would not go unarmed, and I wouldn't feel guilty if I had to use it either. It's not like they take it frequently.

[road.not.taken]

I think I've done this trip 30+ times by now, with kids ranging in age from 1 to 19! We have tried it every which way: no layover, short layover, long layover. My advice for kids your age:

Get it done all at once, nothing compares to the dread of having to re-board when you are feeling half dead and you have to stumble around the Frankfurt airport for 2 hours. Chances are good the kids will be asleep then anyway. Make the overall trip as short as possible.

Acknowledge that having Mom & Dad strapped into a seat next to them for 19 hours is all most kids could hope for, its way more stressful for you then for them.

Take advantage of meal times and when light are on ~ walk them around as much as you can while passengers are awake.

Ask to sit with other families

Bring the car seat but check that there is a place to store it on board if you decide not to use it. This way you'll have it when you land if your luggage goes missing.

Bring a change of clothes for the kids, and clean shirts for you. Accidents happen...

Bring their favorite snack food and decide before boarding that they can pretty much eat whatever they want.

Test drive a sleepy drug for the kids and for God's sake use it.

Don't forget to bring along a 'fun bag' as carry-on. Fill it with as many fun (quiet!) activities as you can, all of them new. New books, play-doh, pipe cleaners, sticker books. Cram it full of fun things to do and pull them out at strategic times. Spend the money, it's worth it.

If the three year old isn't used to headphones, then I'd work on that before departure

Load up an ipod with kid music and videos

Get lots of help at the other end. Someone refreshed and rested who can meet you at the airport who knows the kids is the best option.

Good luck and don't forget to take a deep breath, it'll be fine.

[manutdfan]

Hi there,

My concern is the 1 year old. He won't sit still and wants to wobble around everywhere. The flight home from the UK at Xmas was rough - never slept and couldn't walk yet but hated being held, etc. I should add that I don't love to fly but that wouldn't sway my opinion - worried more for the kids.

WWYD? Or better yet - what have you already tested?

Another question - carseat on the plane for the one year old if we are in business? We usually do so he sleeps better but not sure as this is very posh for me
TIA!

I recently flew from the UK to Singapore with my not quite two year old daughter.

I did have a couple of advantages - she was well trained in going to sleep in the mid afternoon / evenings - it was a morning flight from London.

We were in economy and the staff on SIA were wonderful - always turning up with extra snacks and things for her. We walked around the cabin a bit - she loves to grab my legs from behind like she's the second row of the scrum - I made sure I had toys - in the mid afternoon (uk time) I settled her down with a DVD of her favourite TV show - and she fell asleep a couple of hours earlier than her usual time and stayed that way until about 40 minutes before we landed.

There was an element of luck in this - but there was also the element of maintaining her routine as much as I possibly could on the flight.

My wife flew back to the UK with the not quite four year old on a night time flight - which took off three hours past his bedtime - so he got on the plane, went to sleep and stayed there.

Personally, I'd do the 19 hour flight - there's a good chance the little chap will go to sleep for a good few hours and at least its over and done with.

[snowqueen]

I've been back to the UK twice now, firstly when my son was 10 months old and just recently when he was 13 months old.

The first trip was with Emirates via Dubai. The first leg was fab as it was a night flight and he slept a large chunk of it but I didn't so by the time we got to Dubai, I was exhausted. The stress of getting him settled on the plane again ready for take off then trying to get him to sleep so I could get some rest was a nightmare. He wouldn't eat, drink or sleep. In the end I was a snivelling wreck and the the air crew had to rescue me ha ha. They took care of my baby while I pulled myself together and had a cup of tea. The flight back was allot better but the transfer in Dubai was a nightmare as it was a 20 mile walk to my gate with a stroller and a heavy flight back full of baby supplies.

When I went back in February I did BA direct and it was AMAZING! They had little car seat like chairs rather than a flat bassinet and as they were both night flights he slept most of the way there and back only to wake for a little play and eat time. I will do direct every time now, now matter the cost, it's totally worth it.

By the way, both these trips were Economy.

[cbavasi]

Just a footnote for those who don't already know - but if you are a parent traveling alone with children Singapore Airlines they will help you every step of the way - getting you to your gate, meeting you at your transfers, helping you with your luggage at arrival and getting through customs...etc. If you request this ahead of time and make sure you again request it when you are checking in it can make life a lot easier.

[NJ]

do it all at once and get it over with. I did it with a VERY active 18 month old and a 3 year old and we managed. The hassle of getting luggage and strange places to sleep is not worth it...We had a 26 hour journey - two plane rides and boat to our final destination and the kids were fine. and it you get business class you'll have an easier time... plus they will sleep and will cope much better than you think and much better than you, probably!!

[Mad Scientist]

There are medicine syrup that you can over the counter from the pharmacist at the airport.
Just tell them that you have young kids and you need something to calm their nerves while in the air.
It is like cough syrup but I cannot recall what it is.
It would not get your kids overdose that I know but it really let them relax and sleep normally up in the air. Works like magic when you gave them an hour b4 flight

I have boys when they were young where we travel a great deal. Layovers or direct whatever makes you go crazy until someone recommend me this .

Talk to the pharmacist. In Changi airport you can get them . Not sure in other airports though

Hope this helps

[road.not.taken]

There are medicine syrup that you can over the counter from the pharmacist at the airport.
Just tell them that you have young kids and you need something to calm their nerves while in the air.
It is like cough syrup but I cannot recall what it is.
It would not get your kids overdose that I know but it really let them relax and sleep normally up in the air. Works like magic when you gave them an hour b4 flight

I have boys when they were young where we travel a great deal. Layovers or direct whatever makes you go crazy until someone recommend me this .

Talk to the pharmacist. In Changi airport you can get them . Not sure in other airports though

Hope this helps

I made a similar suggestion with one important difference: you have to try it out first. The same medication that makes some kids sleepy, makes other kids hyperactive.I would never try it our at the airport before getting on a 19 hour flight.

[Mad Scientist]

RNT

I absolutely agree with you. That is why do NOT buy from the counter as it can be the reverse of what you expect.
Like I said talk to the pharmacist or your own GP, they will know what to recommend.
30 yrs of travelling, half of it with kids , I never had this problem.
Guess I am lucky in this one