Singapore Expats Forum

Dating a Muslim girlfriend

Discuss about the latest news & interesting topics, real life experience or other out of topic discussions with locals & expatriates in Singapore.

raden888
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 258
Joined: Mon, 08 Feb 2010

Postby raden888 » Tue, 04 May 2010 6:59 pm

yeah, I know a lot of Muslims who think this way.It seems drinking and gambling are the lesser evils.

Not eating pork seems central to the Muslim identity.

In my books two wrongs does not make a right. Haram is Haram!

User avatar
Superglide
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 449
Joined: Fri, 17 Aug 2007
Location: In a spacious appartment

Postby Superglide » Wed, 05 May 2010 12:48 am

raden888 wrote:In my books two wrongs does not make a right. Haram is Haram!


As long as it is not the Quran you wrote, your books don't matter to muslims, and rightfully so.
If only we could pull out our brain and use only our eyes.
Pablo Picasso

Girl_Next_Door
Reporter
Reporter
Posts: 612
Joined: Thu, 28 Aug 2008

Postby Girl_Next_Door » Wed, 05 May 2010 8:29 am

raden888 wrote:yeah, I know a lot of Muslims who think this way.It seems drinking and gambling are the lesser evils.

Not eating pork seems central to the Muslim identity.

In my books two wrongs does not make a right. Haram is Haram!


I agree. Not eating pork seems central to the Muslim identity where drinking and gambling are the lesser evils.

Although I would think gambling would be a greater evil since most religions forbid gambling?

Oh, I am asking this because I am trying to "shut" my bf up. Each time he meet a Muslim friend/colleague of mine, he asked the same question (each time every time). It gets embarrassing because my friend/colleague just smile, each time with no answer on their actions as well...

Professor_Balthazar
Newbie
Newbie
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed, 05 May 2010

Postby Professor_Balthazar » Wed, 05 May 2010 8:14 pm

Girl_Next_Door wrote:
I agree. Not eating pork seems central to the Muslim identity where drinking and gambling are the lesser evils.

Although I would think gambling would be a greater evil since most religions forbid gambling?

Oh, I am asking this because I am trying to "shut" my bf up. Each time he meet a Muslim friend/colleague of mine, he asked the same question (each time every time). It gets embarrassing because my friend/colleague just smile, each time with no answer on their actions as well...


I think the main reason is that in Quran it has clearly stated "you're not allowed to eat pork", while for alcohol or gambling there is no verse. (Just it has said don't say your prayers while you're drunk.)

Drinking alcohol and gambling have been banned by prophet and gradually. Some of muslims believe because of the changes in life patterns during the time, some of prophet's commands can be changed.

As for levels of "evility" of sins, in Islam there is such thing like big sin and small sin, but I don't know which of these are small sin and which big.

One more thing, this is my idea and I'm not so sure how much it is correct, but I think this can convince your bf, since he won't read the whole Quran to find out the truth (hopefully).

User avatar
moloch71
Regular
Regular
Posts: 58
Joined: Fri, 04 Mar 2005
Location: Melbourne
Contact:

Postby moloch71 » Wed, 05 May 2010 8:23 pm

Professor_Balthazar wrote:in Quran it has clearly stated "you're not allowed to eat pork"


'pork' and not 'pig' ?

woohoo, bacon and ham are back in ! :twisted:
Moloch horridus - Australian horny devil lizard, exceptional specimens have been found measuring 8 inches.

User avatar
durain
Director
Director
Posts: 3666
Joined: Thu, 23 Aug 2007
Location: Location: Location: Location:

Postby durain » Wed, 05 May 2010 8:34 pm

yummy pork. :D

Girl_Next_Door
Reporter
Reporter
Posts: 612
Joined: Thu, 28 Aug 2008

Postby Girl_Next_Door » Thu, 06 May 2010 8:35 am

Professor_Balthazar wrote:I think the main reason is that in Quran it has clearly stated "you're not allowed to eat pork", while for alcohol or gambling there is no verse. (Just it has said don't say your prayers while you're drunk.)

Drinking alcohol and gambling have been banned by prophet and gradually. Some of muslims believe because of the changes in life patterns during the time, some of prophet's commands can be changed.

As for levels of "evility" of sins, in Islam there is such thing like big sin and small sin, but I don't know which of these are small sin and which big.

One more thing, this is my idea and I'm not so sure how much it is correct, but I think this can convince your bf, since he won't read the whole Quran to find out the truth (hopefully).


It seems to work! He looks convinced by your theory! He just said its the same as what is in the Bible and what the Pope said, not in the Bible but its a rule of conduct.

But thanks!

User avatar
nakatago
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 8333
Joined: Tue, 01 Sep 2009
Location: Sister Margaret’s School for Wayward Children
Contact:

Postby nakatago » Thu, 06 May 2010 8:45 am

Wow, it's like when Jesus turned water into wine. What kind of endorsement will you still be looking for?

User avatar
Vaucluse
Director
Director
Posts: 3443
Joined: Sun, 10 Jul 2005

Postby Vaucluse » Thu, 06 May 2010 11:53 am

nakatago wrote:Wow, it's like when Jesus turned water into wine. What kind of endorsement will you still be looking for?


That's my kind of prophet! :D
......................................................

'nuff said Image

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Postby JR8 » Thu, 06 May 2010 9:20 pm

This is a long thread, so I regret that I do not have time to read it through.

I am Christian and married a muslim (last year). I did NOT convert, despite two cousins in law (mat salls) doing just that.


The thing for me was the immovable, implacable, unarguable challenge put down before marriage 'Convert or else, give up your culture'. Sorry I'm willing to discuss things, but no ultimatums like that on marriage day thanks.

Luckily the wife has a name that would not be recognised as bhumi. So they don't know.

raden888
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 258
Joined: Mon, 08 Feb 2010

Postby raden888 » Thu, 06 May 2010 10:51 pm

Girl_Next_Door wrote:
It seems to work! He looks convinced by your theory! He just said its the same as what is in the Bible and what the Pope said, not in the Bible but its a rule of conduct.

But thanks!


Or you could also let him know that world is full of hypocrites. Probably 90 % of us are hypocrites and they exist in every belief system. Most of us though , would not readily admit to being one. :P

User avatar
Mad Scientist
Director
Director
Posts: 3447
Joined: Thu, 03 Dec 2009
Location: TIMBUKTU

Postby Mad Scientist » Fri, 07 May 2010 4:29 am

deleted
Last edited by Mad Scientist on Wed, 20 Oct 2010 7:41 am, edited 1 time in total.
The positive thinker sees the invisible, feels the intangible, and achieves the impossible.Yahoo !!!

User avatar
nakatago
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 8333
Joined: Tue, 01 Sep 2009
Location: Sister Margaret’s School for Wayward Children
Contact:

Postby nakatago » Fri, 07 May 2010 8:49 am

Well, I don't know about you guys and I'm no theologian but I think these prohibitions on animals in the holy books because these were the best they could do with hygiene, given their scientific knowledge more than two thousand years ago. And about alcohol, they were basically saying "don't get drunk lest you do something you'll end up regretting once you sober up."

User avatar
Vaucluse
Director
Director
Posts: 3443
Joined: Sun, 10 Jul 2005

Postby Vaucluse » Fri, 07 May 2010 10:18 am

JR8 wrote:The thing for me was the immovable, implacable, unarguable challenge put down before marriage 'Convert or else, give up your culture'. Sorry I'm willing to discuss things, but no ultimatums like that on marriage day thanks.

Luckily the wife has a name that would not be recognised as bhumi. So they don't know.



Many moons ago I also had an ultimatum like that from a Malay lady I had been living with.
I told her that my religion did not allow for me to convert, so she would have to be the one.
Thus was discussed over a bottle of wine, eating non-halal Italian . . . she was aghast at such a suggestion.

I broke it off . . . hypocrisy is a bitch.


Your wife's maiden name may not sound bhumi, but doesn't her IC state ethnicity and even religion?
......................................................



'nuff said Image

User avatar
JR8
Immortal
Immortal
Posts: 16514
Joined: Wed, 24 Mar 2010
Location: K. Puki Manis

Postby JR8 » Fri, 07 May 2010 1:46 pm

Vaucluse,

That's the thing. If even before your wedding day you are presented with a zero-discussion ultimatum, convert or else it's not happening, what kind of precedent does it set for the future? It's even beyond that, it is not the individual's request/'fault', it is just what HAS to be done.

No, no id on my wife identifies her religion, neither does her name. Good job as I understand the police were making arrests for 'close proximity' (kalwat?) on Tioman just last year!

Frankly the wife is just disinterested in the whole matter. I go a bit further and regard religion as an archaic and absurdly blunt way of trying to control people...


  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Return to “General Discussions”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests