To move or not to move. THAT is the question.

[leamaw]

Hey,

I have been offered an opportunity to relocate from the UK to Singapore with my current organisation. If I don't relocate, I will be made redundant.

If I had been in this position a year ago, there is no doubt I would have taken the opportunity... but a couple of months ago I lost my other half to cancer and this year has been horrificly tough and sad. I'm not sure I can cope with being 13 hours away without the people I love...

So I'm leaving it to you guys, the people who are already there, to tell me why I would be MAD not to go.

Thanks

Leanne

[x9200]

Leanne, Singapore is worth of living here - no doubts about this, esp. if your salary can cover a bit more than basic daily expenses, but for your question and pretty complex situation I would say you'd better ask your friends not some anonymous characters from a random forum. They should know you better. Perhaps such huge change will suit you, perhaps not. Hard to tell if you do not know the person.

[SJM]

Leanne,
sounds like you've had an incredibly tough time! I am moving out to Singapore in March (been told i'm crazy if i don't!!) I think its a great opportunity but I suffer badly from homesickness & you may not know me but my advice would be give it a go and just remember (like i've been telling myself everyday ) you are only a plane ride home & you only live once!
If you do go then i'd happily meet for a cup of tea or a glass of wine!

[carolynW]

A friend in a similar situation as you 10 years ago also lost his spouse and had an offer out here and he was concerned about not being close to his friends etc., in the end he came and really enjoyed his time, in fact will not want to leave. His main point to me (as we were having a hard time deciding whether or not to move) was that even if you didn't like it here in 6 months and found it tough, you could always move back, the decision is reversible, its not the "end".

[Pepijn]

For me the situation was different at first (not suffering your loss). I went to Singapore for a 2 week business trip and during that time my, then, long-term girlfriend ran off with someone else.

After I returned to the Netherlands, my client asked if I wanted to return to singapore for 6 months. I decided to do that and never regretted it. Skype, Voice over IP and what have we not, have been very benificial staying in touh with friends and family. If you are an outgoing person you will soon encircle yourself with people etc.

As mentioned, this was definately a different situation, but I liked that period so much, I am happy to finaly relocate indefinitaly.

[irvine]

It seems hard to move or not to move, isn't it?

How about changing a perspective and see it as a short term change of place? This will also help air out some sadness even though I understand your current place and friends mean a lot to you. They will still be there, bring photographs of familiar things and friends, make a point to keep in touch via technology. Also, book a return ticket to your current place for say the next 3 months, then you'll have somethign to look forward to as well.

It is certainly a new adventure to try out on, and to find yourself again.

[Strong Eagle]

I've not answered until now because I have been thinking about it. On the whole, you should move.

a) Job - Move. Have versus have not, and maybe it will be easy to find another job if you have been made redundant, but maybe not. And your employer must like you to make the offer.

b) New Start - Move. Painful loss... and coming here will be new and exciting.

c) Friends - not quite the same as sitting in the same room but with skype video, sms, and many other options, communications is relatively easy.

d) It isn't permanent... you could always go back if it doesn't work.

e) It's an adventure... and you will kick yourself if you don't take this opportunity when you look back on it a few years from now.

[macaroonie]

Life is not the party we expected is it? You've been through a really rough time, you are not the first and won't be the last, i hope that is of some comfort.

Now to move or not, in the end no matter what anyone says, it's up to whether you think this opportunity will be a positive step in moving forward with your life and finding happiness again. In the end as most people have said, it's not a permanent decision and you can always go back. But definitely come here and reach out and meet lots of new people. In the end we all go through similar things in one way or another, you're not alone

Wish you all the very best in whatever decision you make!