arrontan74 wrote:After the dust settles, we emerge, different. May be good, may be bad. Depends. A shadow within remains, that's for sure.
Couldn't agree more. Its a very very tough journey. And so the cliche saying goes, whatever doesn't kill you WILL make you stronger. I had a short marriage and had my divorce officiated last year after a 3-year separation. I have no kids with my ex, no alimony or whatsoever. Seems like a very clear-cut case but oh...the pain, was like nothing I could have imagined even as one who grew up in a emotionally abusive background. I went through hell and went to hell, back and forth and back and forth...
Years down the years, all the pain you're experiencing now will only be a distant memory. It is for me. And the most important lesson I've learnt is, to forgive the other party, forgive myself and let go. It's a very tough decision to make but the healing that comes is powerful and liberating.
And I'm sorry to have to say this, but do be cautious about the kind of support groups you join. There is (at least) 1 that I know of, where men prey on the ladies who are hurting and vulnerable. Sad but true...
Take many deep breaths and live a day at a time...
who are trying to change me into a Chinese and a wife that is always complaining, nagging and money orientated... 
