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**** Happens!

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sundaymorningstaple
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**** Happens!

Postby sundaymorningstaple » Mon, 11 May 2009 11:44 pm

**** = S H I T

**** Happens in various world religions

  • TAOISM: **** happens.
  • CONFUCIANISM: Confucius say, "**** happens".
  • ZEN: (What is the sound of **** happening?)
  • JESUITISM: If **** happens and when nobody is watching, is it really ****?
  • ISLAM: **** happens if it is the will of Allah.
  • COMMUNISM: Equal **** happens to all people.
  • CATHOLICISM: **** happens because you are bad.
  • PSYCHOANALYSIS: **** happens because of your toilet training.
  • SCIENTOLOGY: **** happens if you're on our **** list.
  • ZOROASTRIANISM: Bad **** happens, and good **** happens.
  • UNITARIANISM: Maybe **** happens. Let's have coffee and donuts.
  • RIGHT-WING PROTESTANTISM: Let this **** happen to someone else.
  • JUDAISM: Why does **** always happen to US?
  • REFORM JUDAISM: Got any Kaopectate?
  • MYSTICISM: What weird ****!
  • AGNOSTICISM: What is this ****?
  • ATHEISM: I don't believe this ****!
  • NIHILISM: Who needs this ****?
  • AZTEC: Cut out this ****!
  • QUAKER: Let's not fight over this ****.
  • FORTEANISM: No ****??
  • 12-STEP: I am powerless to cut the ****.
  • VOODOO: Hey, that **** looks just like you!
  • NEWAGE: Visualize **** not happening.
  • DEISM: **** just happens.
  • EXISTENTIALISM: **** doesn't happen; **** is.
  • SECULAR HUMANISM: **** evolves.
  • CHRISTIAN SCIENCE: **** is in your mind.
  • BUDDHISM: **** happens, but pay no mind.
  • SHINTOISM: **** is everywhere.
  • HINDUISM: This **** has happened before.
  • WICCA: Mix this **** together and make it happen!
  • HASIDISM: **** never happens the same way twice.
  • THEOSOPHY: You don't know half of the **** that happens.
  • DIANETICS: Your mother gave you **** before your were born.
  • SEVENTH DAY ADVENTIST: No **** on Saturdays.
  • JEHOVAH's WITNESSES: No **** happens until Armageddon.
  • MOONIES: Only happy **** really happens.
  • HOPI: Corn fertilizer happens.
  • BAHA'I: It's all the same ****.
  • STOICISM: This **** is good for me.
  • OBJECTIVISM: Our **** is good for you.
  • EST: If my **** bothers you, that's your fault.
  • REAGANISM: Don't move; the **** will trickle down.
  • FASCISM: **** makes the trains run on time.
  • CARGO CULT: A barge will come and take all the **** away.
  • EMACS: Hold down Control-Meta-****.
  • DISCORDIANISM: Some funny **** happened to me today.
  • RASTAFARIANISM: Let's smoke this ****.
  • CHARISMATIC: This is not **** and it doesn't smell bad.
  • MASONIC: **** happens, but we can't discuss it during Lodge.
  • RED CROSS: **** happens - send money.

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