childcare/helper question for working moms

[Mondia]

does the helper look after the children all day and also cook and clean or do you have someone else come in for cooking and cleaning? can't figure out how to handle this. have 1 child in pre-school and a 10 month-old who obviously needs full-time attention. can someone tell me what all the helper does and how you manage. thanks much.

[woozel]

Hi

I am a bit different to you in that I have one child one child in pre-school until 12:30 and one in school until 3:30, but we split our helper's day into two shifts. Mornings are for doing housework and getting chores done, and afternoons we have told her not to do any housework - it is just about the children (with a decent lunchbreak in between of course). She fetches the little one from school, puts her to nap, and then has her lunchbreak. She then collects the other child from school and plays with them in the afternoon - swims / paints / draws etc.

We found having a formal schedule helps as it is clear to her and to us what is supposed to be happening when, and it gave us peace of mind that we weren't overburdening her. If she is stressed about things then this will transfer on to the children, and the kids are the most important thing here.

You may want to consider getting someone in to do a thorough clean once a week, so the stress isn't too big on the maid, assuming you would want the focus to be on the children?

[Mondia]

Hi

We found having a formal schedule helps as it is clear to her and to us what is supposed to be happening when, and it gave us peace of mind that we weren't overburdening her. If she is stressed about things then this will transfer on to the children, and the kids are the most important thing here.

You may want to consider getting someone in to do a thorough clean once a week, so the stress isn't too big on the maid, assuming you would want the focus to be on the children?

Thanks so much and yes, the kids are definitely the focus. What I am worried about is that the maid will not give the kids the attention and interaction that we expect (we had a nanny in New York) and our 10 month-old will be with her all day. Would you mind telling me how old your kids are? And does it make sense to put the little one in day-care for a few hours just to get her the stimulation and social interaction that she needs? Also, are you comfortable with your kids in the water with her? Thanks again!

[Callalily]

Maids are not nannies and it would be a miracle to find one who is able to give the level of stimulation a nursery nurse or a nanny can give to a child. If I were you, I wouldn't hesitate to put my child in qualified childcare for part of the day at least. my children are older than yours (twins aged 3 and a 7 yr old) but during school hols, we take holidays or half-days off in turns to make sure we do exciting things with them. I have a FANTASTIC helper, but I don't think she can offer them the level of stimulation I want them to have.

Best of luck

[cbavasi]

i didn't realize that there are daycares for 10 month olds. would it be financially unrealistic to employ a maid and when your youngest is older then send her to a daycare for a couple of hours?
in regard to it being a miracle to find a helper to provide stimulation for a child - i disagree. we've employed 2 helpers over the past 5 years who have been nothing short of amazing in their interaction with the kids. that being said - they can't be expected to clean house, cook dinner, play with kids...etc. all with 100% enthusiasm. no one could! find a schedule that works in your house. your 10 month old is probably still napping - so have the maid do her housework during the nap - or employ a part-timer to come in and assist once a week.

[uk-kiwi]

I also disagree that a maid can't offer suitable stimulation. What do you think Filipino mothers do with their children all day?

My maid is amazing with my children - she's ok at housework, cooking etc but really excels when it comes to games, crafts etc. That said, I do not work at the moment but if i did have a child too young to go to playschool (older than 18mths) I would probably consider a baby nursery for a half day. More so that it isn't overwhelming for the maid and so that your 10mth old has a good 'social life'. If you google you will find a few care centres that cater for babies - can't vouch for them though.