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unacceptable remarks for different races
unacceptable remarks for different races
i'm a filipina. and i could say that in the Phil., anyone could just say anything even the "hey u've gotten fat" and it won't meant great offense. although i could never speak for all filipinos
..one could know the basic stats of a person in the same breath as the first "Hi!". when i got here i watch what i say and ask 'coz am not so familiar w/ all the different customs and cultures. i couldn't practice the "say to others what you want others would say to you", as i have lived in a place where one would know practically another's whole family history at first meeting and it's pretty normal. and it maybe too nosey for comfort for others..i'm sure there's more to "it's pretty hot today" line...so what is ok and what's not for you?

time to get out..
- sundaymorningstaple
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Here and There
I'm from a suburb of Boston.
In the US folks are just as curious about "the dirt" ( gossip, rumors and heresay ) on people but are probably a little less direct about it than Asians are. Office gossip is prevalent, but it's done on a pretty low-profile basis behind people's backs.
People are rarely confronted directly on their salaries, politics, medical conditions, appearance and hygene topics. Here, in Asia, those topics aren't necessarily taboo in everyday conversation. In some ways it's less disingenuous than back home, I guess, but it seems more confrontational and invasive.
Anyway, that's been my experience; others may disagree.
In the US folks are just as curious about "the dirt" ( gossip, rumors and heresay ) on people but are probably a little less direct about it than Asians are. Office gossip is prevalent, but it's done on a pretty low-profile basis behind people's backs.
People are rarely confronted directly on their salaries, politics, medical conditions, appearance and hygene topics. Here, in Asia, those topics aren't necessarily taboo in everyday conversation. In some ways it's less disingenuous than back home, I guess, but it seems more confrontational and invasive.
Anyway, that's been my experience; others may disagree.
- sundaymorningstaple
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I believe the OP is actually referring to when just meeting someone for the first time. At least that was how I responded to her. That phenomenon is widely practice even when you have been just introduced to someone.


SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers
All of the above, and there's one person I work with who to this day years later tries to work the age question in, despite my explaining it is rude and not done where I come from.
This also happens in Japan, where they are trying to see where you fit in with them, so they know to talk up or talk down (not the bad meaning of that but for the correct level of politeness and seniority) to you. There as well I have had to explain this too many times.
This strikes me as odd as many Westerners come to a place understanding some of the customs and try to observe them, but this is rarely a two-way street.
Then again, I still see European women going topless at beaches in Thailand, despite every travel book explaining that the Thais find it offensive.
This also happens in Japan, where they are trying to see where you fit in with them, so they know to talk up or talk down (not the bad meaning of that but for the correct level of politeness and seniority) to you. There as well I have had to explain this too many times.
This strikes me as odd as many Westerners come to a place understanding some of the customs and try to observe them, but this is rarely a two-way street.
Then again, I still see European women going topless at beaches in Thailand, despite every travel book explaining that the Thais find it offensive.
Ape Shall Not Kill Ape
A fair question and ghe answer is obvious . . . innit!positano wrote: whether i think caucasian men make better husbands (shocking question)

Having said that I find most Asians (except Japanese who I find to be very polite and not nosy at all, so my account differs from EADG's) not very backward in coming forward.
Different strokes for different folks.
Our maid/nanny is Filipina and listening to her conversations with other PH-ers is quite amusing when they're over at our house for tea and chats . . .
'Ah, you have such a big bum now'
"What happened to your face, you are so pangit (ugly, I believe)"
etc . . . Very open about that.
......................................................
'nuff said
'nuff said

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For me, none of that "How old are you?" "Are you married?", "What's your occupation?" and "How much do you earn?" crap. Also, no racial or cultural remarks, no "Oh you whatever are always this and that!", that's almost like a declaration of war right from the get go...Brings out the klingon in me right away! 

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