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by ksl » Thu, 07 May 2009 12:17 pm
unfortunately Western Culture as we have all noticed, is given a free reign, to do what they want, otherwise all the human right organisations are screaming for rights.
My own personal opinion is that, the west has evolved into nations of contemptuous, adolescents, that are very disrespectful at times, when they should be listening of the wisdom of parents.
Nothing much is new, except for the cocktail of drugs, fashions, and self egoistic attitudes, that are totally disrespectful towards most old people, it's very easy to sit in a comfort zone and not see or notice what the majority have to put up with, and with all due respect, that there are still many that may listen to their parents, values have changed dramatically.
Back in my time in the 60's we could leave our back doors open, in the local housing estates of UK, today it is a no no.
Even my own mother was robbed 3 times while in her 80's, by kids knocking on the door, pushing her over and stealing her handbag, and she new them, still the police did absolutely nothing.
I think until that time comes, that you need help yourself, you will realise just how self centred the world has come.
My own family was a very close family, and my mother a very proud mother, that would never leave her own home to move in with the kids, so daily she would be visited by both my brother and sister, to cater for her needs.
Also good neighbours helped, after all a community which is built up over 50 years, still has old traditions, yet are terrorised by the new, rampant disregard for law and order by single mothers with bastard children, who make their living on screwing the welfare system for their kids, I'm talking of shag happy slappers, that don't give a damn about anyting but their next party.
Social neglect of governments, that once had stable and effective communities are now in tatters, with ghettos, just like the USA, it's obvious that their is a very close political agenda, which is closely linked to the USA in my opinion.
Asian life was very easy for me to adapt too, and when i proposed to my wife at the age of 50, I still respected that, I had to ask her father, even though she was a grown woman....
Parents in Asia, rely mostly on their children in old age, due to the fact Governments due not provide welfare or pensions.
Back in the time of my in laws, it was normal that one income could provide for a family, and the mother was a housewife to several children, these children are the life and blood of survival, so the parents invest all they work for into the education of their children, with the theory that traditions in the past will continue and the parents will be looked after and supported financially in old age.
Actually Asian life is a simple way of understanding that blood is thicker than water, you must help each other for the seeds of the family to be spread, so that the heritage survives and doesn't die out.
It is tradition that brothers and sisters help parents and each other, to grow together, the bonding of a strong family is the essence of security and survival.
Now compare this with blood line of races, all males, take the females away and the children are normally raised in the fathers culture or religion. We know that the mainland Chinese have a shortage of women, because all girls used to be killed off, in the belief that a male can only be the bread winner.
It's only in the last 20 years that development in these Countries show that women are more capable than males, and in fact the woman is equal in China since the Mao times, becuase they marched side by side in the troubled times.
Traditions die hard and farmers and peasants that still plough the fields, and women work as labourers on construction sites are still quite common, so the whole of Asia is still a very long way behind in development and social change.
Governments also learn from the west, that to give welfare is not always a good thing, it makes people lazy and reliant on the system, which i agree with.
I say this because i have a son that is also a lazy, worthless individual, that i never raised, and who he never listens too, his day is passed smoking a few joints the same as the rest of his peers, they draw 250 pounds a week and could never earn that, if employed, it makes me puke, to think what the west has done, by destroying the spirit of family by making so many stupid mistakes like banning physical discipline when required.
My son lived with me for a while when he married, again I protested against the bride, she wasn't worthy for any man, and i refused to go to the wedding, after a few months i told them to leave, I just couldn't ignore the fact, that they smoked joints in my house.
Of course i love my son, he's grown up 36 years old, but still I have no respect for his life, people choose, who they socialise with and I'm afraid that in my youth, lots of drugs were around, but I stayed well away from them, and the people that took them.
It's heart breaking to see, kids that have become addicts and i have seen some from wealthy family's too, so my opinions maybe old fashioned, but it's the only way to survive, this things can also happen in Asian circles too, although the tighter the bond between families, the highly unlikely that it will happen, the black sheep maybe a gambler, because this is also a weakness of Asians, too and I have one Chinese friend who has lost everything to gambling and feels he's been so bad, to his family, although he was probably a lucky one to escape the group of triads he was a member of.
So you see Asian culture is far more complexed and reliant on family support in old age, because of the heavy investment that parents put in.. In this day and age, it takes two incomes to live for western life styles, yet Asian's do not waste their hard earned cash in the same way.
Singapore on the other hand is more developed in a cosmoplitan way and standards of education and life styles have changed so much, that materialism and ego is first priority in City life, this we see in most major Cities.
It's been an easy task for Government to develop a Country on the exploitation of cheap labour the last 40 years, and it's inherent in Singaporeans to exploit, what they can to achieve wealth, with very few government restrictions, after all Singapore was a trading nation before a financial one and one can see that traditions here have changed in many ways, to the rest of Asia, because of ego and self centred attitudes, of some, that dump their parents, for the high life.
If one is not in tune, with traditions of race, then the success of marriage may well suffer, not always of course, because i do know westerners, that never stay at their in laws, when they visit, because they have difficulty with the culture.
My daughter of 8 years, will learn her roots, and I prefer she sticks to the Chinese way, although I can see that to be challenging, when she has a mind of her own, just like I had, at her age, difficult to discipline, and the traits of a scorpion, that stings itself, although I understand all the hokus pokus of astrolgy, it helps me understand her.
Fire & Water signs, are very likely to make steam and clash over who is boss around here, although man management skills do help too. The main thing is that I see she has respect but in anger can forget it, at times.
Like we all can and in family life it happens, there is the old saying that you made your bed go and lie on it, like with my own son, and some parents would just leave them to it, I know that i did spoil my two kids, in buying many things when I visited UK, but that does not replace the father image they needed. With the bonding not there, there isn't much hope, when i think back to my divorce, and my wife asking me to take my own son, after we had been divorced for 7 years, there must have been a reason and the main one was because he had been neglected for so long that he chose his own way.
I'm sad when i think back, that i have never ever had a birthday card from any of my kids, and yet I am still expected by them to support them when they ask for it, with no effort from themselves to help themselves, I just shake my head and think what has happend to these kids born in the 70's and 80's, with no respect but only wanting.
I made a concious descision not to marry a European, because i wanted to change history within my own family tree and i wanted my marriage to last on a commitment basis, some people do take marriage more serious than others.
I often wondered why no one ever excelled in education but only sports, I never had the opportunity for study, until i made my own money, but late in life, and 25 years of being single, made me realise that a western marriage is so full of risks and focussed on material things, and that wasn't for me. I can live out of a suitcase if i have to, and the appeal to have a famly was also a need I could share, because both my own parents had passed on.
Don't take me too seriously today, but its a thought!|Mixing it is rated very highly in the statistics, so I understand and without a doubt better looking children, that are much stronger and versatile. I have never regretted a mixed marriage, quite the opposite, having studied what weaknesses are reproduced in families.
