De-sensitized to violence?

ozchick · Post by **ozchick** » Sat, 09 Feb 2008 9:42 pm

Went to see what I would consider a good film with a friend last night- 'The Kite-Runner'. It was a bit harrowing in parts and was never gonna be a comedy as my friend had warned me beforehand. As the credits were rolling at the end I noticed that she was crying and I thought that I'd heard a bit of this from other patrons during the screening as well. But me ? Nuh, couldn't seem to get the tears going.. and I've noticed this as I've become older which is also coincidentally as the world has got more violent and much of it we see on the TV these days- in graphic footage on news broadcasts and in documentaries etc. Sad to think that I may have become desensitized to violence and injustice and I'm wondering if a lot of society has become like this. I s'pose I'd react differently if I witnessed such awful scenes in reality.....but still......

Post by **sundaymorningstaple** » Sat, 09 Feb 2008 10:32 pm

ozchick,

I don't think age has anything to do with it at all. I am, however, speaking from a purely personal P.O.V. I was pretty inured to violence by the time I was 20 and definitely by the age of 22. I guess war does that to a person. Within a year of my discharge in 1968 (3 months before I turned 21) after 18 months in VN I ended up shooting and killing a man (it was a holdup) at a Holiday Inn in my home town where I was the Ass't Manager. It was strange in hindsight, afterwards, with the state police there I was just sitting around talking while we were waiting for the body wagon to arrive. Him lying in a rapidly spreading pool of blood in the middle of the lobby floor. It just didn't bother me at all. To this day, it doesn't bother me. I've been on dozens of body snatching jobs on helicopter crashes, Car crashes and the recovery of the bodies of Air Florida Flt 90 in Washington DC 5 months before coming to Singapore in 1982. None bothered me. I'm not a hard person though. But! I hate admitting it but I have a hard time watching certain sentimental movies and staying dry-eyed. Strange.

edited for spelling

durain · Post by **durain** » Sat, 09 Feb 2008 11:50 pm

wait till you watch the latest rambo! it has the most killing/minute!!!

ksl · Post by **ksl** » Sun, 10 Feb 2008 12:59 am

Must agree with SMS on this one!

Emotional films can also bring tears to my eyes, I believe it to be the sign of a very well made movie, and worth watching, if it motivate the sub-consious feelings...not many movies can do it.

ozchick · Post by **ozchick** » Sun, 10 Feb 2008 9:24 am

sundaymorningstaple wrote:ozchick,

I don't think age has anything to do with it at all. I am, however, speaking from a purely personal P.O.V. I was pretty inured to violence by the time I was 20 and definitely by the age of 22. I guess was does that to a person. Within a year of my discharge in 1968 (3 months before I turned 21) after 18 months in VN I ended up shooting and killing a man (it was a holdup) at a Holiday Inn in my home town where I was the Ass't Manager. It was strange in hindsight, afterwards, with the state police there I was just sitting around talking while we were waiting for the body wagon to arrive. Him lying in a rapidly spreading pool of blood in the middle of the lobby floor. It just didn't bother me at all. To this day, it doesn't bother me. I've been on dozens of body snatching jobs on helicopter crashes, Car crashes and the recovery of the bodies of Air Florida Flt 90 in Washington DC 5 months before coming to Singapore in 1982. None bothers me. I'm not a hard person though. But! I hate admitting it but I have a hard time watching certain sentimental movies and staying dry-eyed. Strange.

Well sms, I just would just have to run in front of a bus with what you' ve described and I remember some of this coming up in discussion before...mm...reckon if there is such a thing as reincarnation, I'm coming back as a bloke ! But from what you and ksl say, I could be a tough guy and still find a well-made movie quite emotionally challenging. Thank God for that I s'pose. We girls like a bit of 'heart' in our guys ! Yep, there's an upside to everything !

familyof5 · Post by **familyof5** » Sun, 10 Feb 2008 1:31 pm

have you seen brokeback mountain yet??

Forks · Post by **Forks** » Sun, 10 Feb 2008 9:30 pm

before I became a parent sad movies with kids in them didnt phase me, afterwards those kind of movies have me blubbering in no time.

Wind In My Hair · Post by **Wind In My Hair** » Sun, 10 Feb 2008 9:35 pm

ozchick wrote:I may have become desensitized to violence and injustice and I'm wondering if a lot of society has become like this.

Not me. I'm a woose and will faint in a hospital just imagining the pain that other people are going through. So I'm VERY sensitive to violence and will not watch violent or scary movies. Hope that restores your faith in humankind.

ozchick · Post by **ozchick** » Sun, 10 Feb 2008 10:13 pm

Wind In My Hair wrote:
ozchick wrote:I may have become desensitized to violence and injustice and I'm wondering if a lot of society has become like this.
Not me. I'm a woose and will faint in a hospital just imagining the pain that other people are going through. So I'm VERY sensitive to violence and will not watch violent or scary movies. Hope that restores your faith in humankind.

Oh it does sweet girl ! I would hope WIMH that there aren't too many ladies like me around. The world has enough 'macho men' without us ladies trying to emulate them !

ozchick · Post by **ozchick** » Sun, 10 Feb 2008 10:20 pm

familyof5 wrote:have you seen brokeback mountain yet??

No f.o.f I haven't. The theme of that particular movie just doesn't grab me. I remember seeing Philadelphia (Tom Hanks) and found it a bit difficult to stomach. Having said that, my friend with whom I saw The Kite Runner was saying that I should see Brokeback Mountain...so yeah maybe I'll give it a shot and perhaps prove myself wrong.
The only times I remember crying at films were Love Story (ten million years ago) and Ghost (Demi Moore)so yeah maybe I'm a sook for the wrong reason......

Wind In My Hair · Post by **Wind In My Hair** » Sun, 10 Feb 2008 10:26 pm

ozchick wrote:The world has enough 'macho men' without us ladies trying to emulate them !

Emulate? Never! Already superior beings don't emulate lesser men.

Post by **sundaymorningstaple** » Sun, 10 Feb 2008 10:47 pm

Baiting?

Wind In My Hair · Post by **Wind In My Hair** » Sun, 10 Feb 2008 11:31 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:Baiting?

Superior beings would never mistake such heavenly morsels for bait.

familyof5 · Post by **familyof5** » Mon, 11 Feb 2008 7:55 am

ghost? spare me! not that bit with the clay making surely!!

phil30k · Post by **phil30k** » Mon, 11 Feb 2008 10:29 am

I've watched the movie and thought it was very truthful. Reasons to cry include:
1. Remember that the couple could not have children and the child was like getting an adopted son. A damaged child but you get to see the start of the healing process. If that was the case, the tears are of gratitude, not sadness. The person would probably feel good after they cry. People who had a hard life as a child may empathize and also cry.
2. The male protagonist was paying off an emotional debt, atoning for a mistake that he made out of fear and guilt and shame. That he had a chance to atone may make some cry if they empathize with his situation. Tears of sympathy.
3. The symbolism of the kites, the kites were the symbol of a happier time and the connection of the two friends. It was used at the end of the movie to symbolize the start of happy times, kind of like riding off into the sunset or "happy ever after". Tears of Joy.
I'd probably be able to think of a few more but I'm just saying the people who cried may have cried for different reasons.
I didn't cry though, I was too immersed other aspects of the movie. If the movie were a little more meaningless, I may have cried.
Altogether a great movie that I would heartily recommend.

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