Your wife and two children are irrelevant to the question. Were I to be asked to set someone's salary on the basis on family size, I'd tell them to take a hike.
You've been there 9 years and don't have a sense of what they will be willing to pay you? You're a manager and don't know what your employees make?
Do you have P&L responsibility? Have you met or exceed revenue and/or profit targets? What is your staff retention track record like?
For a small company salaries can be much more variable depending upon the value you create for the firm.