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Being Driven - in born or can it be learnt?

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Taos
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Being Driven - in born or can it be learnt?

Postby Taos » Fri, 13 Oct 2006 12:07 pm

I keep hearing lots of being "driven" in one's job/career. Sometime ago, if im not mistaken, one poster had mentioned something about her boss being very driven.. and today the subject again came up.

I am not 'driven'. Sometimes i can get things done very quickly and at other times i procrastinate and dont get too excited. I like my job but at the same time getting started on a project and wanting to complete it very quickly simply is not in my blood! I do it only because i need to .. not because i WANT to? Why ever not!!??

How do i go about getting into a mode of WANTING to be driven? Ok I WANT to be driven... so what next? What do i need to do to my brain and body to get it into that groove!!! Why cant i be super focused and finish each task quickly instead of being distracted by all sorts of stuff around me? :???: :?

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Postby rb74 » Fri, 13 Oct 2006 1:17 pm

Being focussed is the basic ingredient for being driven. We all have different drivers.

For example, if someone loves lots of money, not only as a means to an end, but also as an end in itself, he would be very driven in a job where he sees he can make that sort of money, say as a banker or a successful business etc. He would be highly miserable in a teaching job, so to speak. Contrast this to someone whose passion is appreciating the higher things in life, say the arts. This person would be driven in a job as a curator in the museum, but would be miserable in a banking job.

So I guess, to be driven, you have to figure out what you want out of life. All of us are different and have different wants in life. The key is to look into yourself and find out what makes YOU happy. We often make a mistake and let others decide what will make us happy.

Sit down, take some time off, clear your mind and think what you really want. Work backwards and you can eventually start doing something which you really like, and trust me, you will be driven !!!!

Hope this works

Cheers

rb

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Postby sundaymorningstaple » Fri, 13 Oct 2006 1:51 pm

rb74.

Good post! I think you hit the nail squarely on the head. I did just that back in '76. I was district director for a large tax accounting firm in Washington DC. I resigned (on my 29th birthday no less!). Sat down and figured out when I was the happiest and found a senario that would pay me to do that. I did and it took me all over the world and got paid to do what I used to pay to do. (Retired from there now and have come full circle but my avatar says it all!) :cool:

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Postby rb74 » Fri, 13 Oct 2006 1:57 pm

SMS, you are right. The problem is that its so difficult to figure out what makes you happy. Where to draw the line between needs and wants. Coupled with that, in today's materialistic world, its so easy to sit back and draw comfort from the material things in life.

For example, someone in Singapore, say drawing a reaonable salary, able to have a good life, will find it very difficult to question whether he is indeed doing something that makes him happy. Achievement of material objects and lifestyle is so often construed to be a proxy for happiness and thats where all problems start.

I'm not saying we should sit down and try to achieve nirvana, but getting detached from what one has is a very important first step in identifying what will make you happy.

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Postby ksl » Sat, 14 Oct 2006 2:54 am

rb74 wrote:SMS, you are right. The problem is that its so difficult to figure out what makes you happy. Where to draw the line between needs and wants. Coupled with that, in today's materialistic world, its so easy to sit back and draw comfort from the material things in life.

For example, someone in Singapore, say drawing a reaonable salary, able to have a good life, will find it very difficult to question whether he is indeed doing something that makes him happy. Achievement of material objects and lifestyle is so often construed to be a proxy for happiness and thats where all problems start.

I'm not saying we should sit down and try to achieve nirvana, but getting detached from what one has is a very important first step in identifying what will make you happy.


Very good post!

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Re: Being Driven - in born or can it be learnt?

Postby Strong Eagle » Sat, 14 Oct 2006 9:09 am

Taos wrote:I keep hearing lots of being "driven" in one's job/career. Sometime ago, if im not mistaken, one poster had mentioned something about her boss being very driven.. and today the subject again came up.

I am not 'driven'. Sometimes i can get things done very quickly and at other times i procrastinate and dont get too excited. I like my job but at the same time getting started on a project and wanting to complete it very quickly simply is not in my blood! I do it only because i need to .. not because i WANT to? Why ever not!!??

How do i go about getting into a mode of WANTING to be driven? Ok I WANT to be driven... so what next? What do i need to do to my brain and body to get it into that groove!!! Why cant i be super focused and finish each task quickly instead of being distracted by all sorts of stuff around me? :???: :?


You sound rather normal to me. I don't think being being 'driven' is healthy at all. Life happens only once and to give it balance in all things is what makes for a life of joy. I feel sorry for the truly driven for they are focused on a single element of life to the exclusion of all others.

You don't get 'super-focused and finish each task quickly' because you are bored with what you do and there is no connect with what you do and what matters to you in life.

I would hope that what you are seeking in life is "passion" for what you do. Passion comes from the heart and can never be generated in the head. It happens when what you do gives you a sense of fulfilment so you want to do more.

I will give you a personal example. I started a business in Singapore two years ago. I could actually care less about the business being succesful, although I hope it is. The business is just a vehicle to satisfy my passions, and those are: I love so solve complex problems, I want to live in a foreign country, and I want to do it my way. I take joy in being really good at what I do. That pushes me through all the drudgery that is entailed in running a business. I'm not driven at all... in fact, I'd just as soon take a nap or go play some golf as actually work... but all are weighed against my passion to do it my way.

There is something else you might wish to consider. How much risk are you willing to take in your life? There is an old saying that goes something like "men leading lives of quiet desparation" and it means that so many people hate the circumstances that they are in but are unwilling to take the risk to make something different for themselves.

It isn't easy to answer but a key question to ask yourself is: What is your mission in life? For example, and this is just a guess, SMS has been a recruiter for many years. Is that his mission? His passion? I doubt it. But maybe his mission, that thing that gives him satisfaction is the service he provides to others... he helps others in their careers, he helps businesses find the people that let them grow... he has made a difference... and at the end of the day making a difference makes it possible to put up with all the crap it takes to be a headhunter.

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Re: Being Driven - in born or can it be learnt?

Postby earthfriendly » Mon, 16 Oct 2006 3:03 am

Strong Eagle wrote:
You sound rather normal to me. I don't think being being 'driven' is healthy at all. Life happens only once and to give it balance in all things is what makes for a life of joy. I feel sorry for the truly driven for they are focused on a single element of life to the exclusion of all others.



It is all about balance. What's the point of being super-driven, super-competitive, super-hardworking and you reach the pinnacle of your career, only to discover you have miss out on the truly important things in your life, family, friends, servicing community etc...

rb74 wrote:Sit down, take some time off, clear your mind and think what you really want. Work backwards and you can eventually start doing something which you really like, and trust me, you will be driven !!!!



Quiet time is so important in helping us find our bearing in this world. More so in the hustle bustle "noisy" environment like singapore. The urban jungle has a numbing effect on one's senses and makes it hard to "feel" things. I advice my sisiter (who lead super busy life) to take a short respite from the daily humdrums, e.g. short stay in monatery, temple, farm or countryside. People reach their full potential when they work on something they are truly passionate about. But it can be tough trying to figure out where lies one's passion. Be open-minded, try different things and see what pricks your interest.

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Postby Wind In My Hair » Mon, 16 Oct 2006 3:02 pm

I am driven, usually by taxi drivers! :D

This is a very nice thread with some very good posts by rb, SMS, SE etc. I agree with everything they say. I'm happiest when I have a reason to get up in the morning, and when I forget my reason, I find it very hard to get out of bed!

For me the reasons, what drives me, usually have to do with people. Sure, we have to DO something, but it's the people we do it for that drives me and I think many others. When I believe that what I'm doing makes the people I love happier or improves their lives somehow, I am driven to do it. Otherwise, like SE says, I'd rather be on the golf course or having high tea.

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Postby EADG » Mon, 16 Oct 2006 11:05 pm

simple answer, OP - you're either driven or not, if you have to be told how to be driven you're aiming for something you're not slated for

it actually struck me as a pretty stupid question (just my opinion), though I would hazard a guess you had sincere intentions

find your dharma, that will drive you

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Dungeons and Dragons

Postby Taos » Tue, 31 Oct 2006 1:26 pm

Thanks to all who didnt think the question was stupid and were kind enough to offer your thoughts.

I will read yr posts again and ponder. I may be 'slow' but there are some things which are very important in the way i work. Integrity, honesty, fairness, etc. My boss is driven by money.. always.. nothing else excites her more than how much she will get from each project and how fast we can complete it. I get excited by the type of people I will come into contact with and the relationships i will form and the things i will learn from each project.

Having said that, our clients DO want speed and quality.. so i need to work on my speed. I dont need constant praise but the odd one will be good. She has never ever praised me for anything nor has she ever admitted to being wrong even when it was obvious she was.

I've come to realise that she only likes the people who can make money quickly for her and i need to overcome that block, of wanting her approval or recognition. I just need to find ways of keeping myself motivated and sane.

Its not a bad job, its not a bad place.. money of course will be better if i prove to be a "fast worker".... Ive been told countless times that i have an inner saboteur... and i agree. Anyone out there succeeded in slaying that dragon?

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Re: Dungeons and Dragons

Postby ksl » Wed, 01 Nov 2006 3:00 am

Taos wrote:Thanks to all who didnt think the question was stupid and were kind enough to offer your thoughts.

I will read yr posts again and ponder. I may be 'slow' but there are some things which are very important in the way i work. Integrity, honesty, fairness, etc. My boss is driven by money.. always.. nothing else excites her more than how much she will get from each project and how fast we can complete it. I get excited by the type of people I will come into contact with and the relationships i will form and the things i will learn from each project.

Having said that, our clients DO want speed and quality.. so i need to work on my speed. I dont need constant praise but the odd one will be good. She has never ever praised me for anything nor has she ever admitted to being wrong even when it was obvious she was.

I've come to realise that she only likes the people who can make money quickly for her and i need to overcome that block, of wanting her approval or recognition. I just need to find ways of keeping myself motivated and sane.

Its not a bad job, its not a bad place.. money of course will be better if i prove to be a "fast worker".... Ive been told countless times that i have an inner saboteur... and i agree. Anyone out there succeeded in slaying that dragon?


Its not a bad job, its not a bad place.. money of course will be better if i prove to be a "fast worker".... Ive been told countless times that i have an inner saboteur... and i agree. Anyone out there succeeded in slaying that dragon?


It's really quite easy to slay the dragon, you just hand in your notice, and work for yourself, maybe sub consciously you don't want to earn more money for her.

I know myself i went through that period, i got sick and tired of making money for others, that expected it, becuase they knew, they could get more out of me, if they pushed me to work harder and longer, but at my own expense. You need to value, your own abilities and put a price on yourself. Whenever my old bosses ask me now, I just say i'm too expensive for you! :D they get the message, we all have our strength & weaknesses, and my weakness was, I would always oblige at my own expense, because the motivational factors (money) are not the same. So they would always take advantage of that.

Today I see all my free time as very valuable, I enjoy it, I don't have to work for money, I get by, and would rather have my time to do things i want to do, although I do help my wife now and then to make money, because i can do it faster, and easier, by that I mean using my brain in a more efficient manner, this was something i learnt, by trial and error btw.

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Postby renter » Thu, 09 Nov 2006 4:04 pm

This is why some people drive, and others are driven.


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