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International Dating :lol:

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sapphire
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International Dating :lol:

Postby sapphire » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 1:00 pm

AMERICAN WOMEN
First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date: You get to grope all over and make out.
Third date: You get to have sex in the missionary position.Then you promise to marry her but will probab ly abandon the idea.


JAPANESE WOMEN
First date: She's shy, so you don't get to kiss her at all.
Second date: She'll take a bath in front of you and let you smell her panties.
Third date: You get to have kinky sex with her. Then she'll bid you sayonara, as that was her last fling as she's getting married to a Japanese man tomorrow.


MALAY WOMEN
First date: You get to touch that big breast of hers.
Second date: You get t o home base with her.
Third date: You have to promise her that you are going to get circumcised. Then you will marry her and find out that you have to support her whole family.
The only consolation is that you get to repeat the procedure three more times as allowed under Islamic law!

CHINESE WOMEN
First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
Second date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner but nothing happens too.
Third date: You have already realized that nothing's going to happen.


INDIAN WOMEN
First date: You meet her parents.
Second date: The date is set for the wedding.
Third date: It's your wedding night!


HONG KONG WOMEN
First date: you lose all your cash in your wallet
Second date: you max out all your credit cards
Third date: you clean out your bank account and you still can't get to first base .. 3 weeks after your third date, you die from SARS.
It's not getting any smarter out there. You have to come to terms with stupidity, and make it work for you.

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Re: International Dating :lol:

Postby earthfriendly » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 1:14 pm

sapphire wrote:

[b]JAPANESE WOMEN

First date: She's shy, so you don't get to kiss her at all.
Second date: She'll take a bath in front of you and let you smell her panties.
Third date: You get to have kinky sex with her. Then she'll bid you sayonara, as that was her last fling as she's getting married to a Japanese man tomorrow.

.


Nice one sapphire. Many people mistakenly assume that Japanese women must be sexually prohibitive because they act so shy. By nature, they are shy and reserve. However, their attitude towards sex is actually very liberal and they are very comfortable with nudity and sexuality, much more so than many cultures out there. Family members take baths together and at the onsen (hot springs), people walk around naked and take shower in public area. This is another aspect of their culture that I love. This pureness of mind to not associate our human body with being dirty and ability to celebrate our sexuality which is really a part of nature. For those who are religious, isn't that what god has intended us to do or else why does he give us this bodily form?

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Re: International Dating :lol:

Postby Plavt » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 3:41 pm

earthfriendly wrote: Family members take baths together and at the onsen (hot springs), people walk around naked and take shower in public area.


About the only one's doing that nowadays will be farmer Yamamoto and his 112 year old wife.

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Postby Ship Shape » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 4:48 pm

Why isnt one on Singapore Women here? Anyone care / dare to do a summary?!

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Postby sapphire » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 4:56 pm

Ship Shape wrote:Why isnt one on Singapore Women here?

The forwarded email didn't cover them, sowwy.

Plavt, how do you know that? :o
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Postby Vaucluse » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 5:01 pm

Plavt had a threesome with Yamaoto and his wife last year . . .


But, he is right - in my pre-marital years I spent one week a month in Japan for about 8 years - - - some are quite shy about their sexuality (especially with a geijin), but on the whoe they are quite the fun partner.

Having said that, there is a prudish influence and even outdoor onsen (with clothes mandatory) are not unisex anymore)

Reminds me of 'Pierre, the French Fighter Pilot' joke, going down in flames . . . .
......................................................

'nuff said Image

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Postby sapphire » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 5:52 pm

Ok, so are we supposed to know this French Pierre person joke? :evil:
It's not getting any smarter out there. You have to come to terms with stupidity, and make it work for you.

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Re: International Dating :lol:

Postby Mary Hatch Bailey » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 5:55 pm

sapphire wrote:AMERICAN WOMEN
First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date: You get to grope all over and make out.
Third date: You get to have sex in the missionary position.Then you promise to marry her but will probab ly abandon the idea.


I'm confused, are Americans known for being boring in bed? Who is the commitment-phobe here? The guy or the girl?

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Postby Saint » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 5:58 pm

sapphire wrote:Ok, so are we supposed to know this French Pierre person joke? :evil:


Come on, the one with Cognac and lighting matches :roll: :lol:

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Postby Carpe Diem » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 6:03 pm

Saint wrote:
sapphire wrote:Ok, so are we supposed to know this French Pierre person joke? :evil:


Come on, the one with Cognac and lighting matches :roll: :lol:


:o
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Postby Saint » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 6:10 pm

Carpe Diem wrote:
Saint wrote:
sapphire wrote:Ok, so are we supposed to know this French Pierre person joke? :evil:


Come on, the one with Cognac and lighting matches :roll: :lol:


:o


That does surprise me CD, you being the fountain of knowledge of all jokes :o

I'll try and find it unless Mr V has it to hand

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Postby Vaucluse » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 8:29 pm

Mr Saint, I believe we should let the great unwashed masses dangle for a while . . . .
......................................................



'nuff said Image

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Postby sapphire » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 8:50 pm

...presuming we're hanging onto every word you say or post in this case. :roll:
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Postby Plavt » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 9:38 pm

Vaucluse wrote:
Reminds me of 'Pierre, the French Fighter Pilot' joke, going down in flames . . . .


Believe I posted that one some time ago

Plavt.

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Is this the one Mr V?

Postby Plavt » Thu, 09 Mar 2006 9:40 pm

Pierre, a French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It's a beautiful day, and love is in the air. Marie leans over to Pierre and says, "Pierre kiss me!" Pierre grabs a bottle of Merlot wine and splashes it on Marie's Lips. "What are you doing, Pierre?" says the startled Marie.

"I am Pierre the fighter pilot! When I have red meat, I have red wine!" She smiles and they start kissing.

When things began to heat up a little, Marie says, "Pierre, kiss me lower." Pierre tears her blouse open, grabs a bottle of Chardonnay and starts pouring it all over her breasts. "Pierre! What are you doing?" asks the bewildered Marie.

"I am Pierre the fighter pilot! When I have white meat, I have white wine!"

They resume their passionate interlude and things really steam up. Marie leans close to his ear and whispers, "Pierre, kiss me lower!" Pierre rips off her underwear, grabs a bottle of Cognac, and pours it in her lap. He then strikes a match and lights it on fire. Marie shrieks and dives into the river. Standing waist deep in the water, Marie throws her arms upwards and screams furiously, "Pierre, what in the hell do you think you're doing?"

Pierre stands up, defiantly, and says, "I am Pierre the fighter pilot! When I go down, I go down in flames!"


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