This one's silly but funny.

Chats, Flames, Jokes, Junks. Don't know where to post ? You've just found the right place.
Post Reply
User avatar
Plavt
Director
Director
Posts: 4278
Joined: Wed, 18 May 2005 2:13 pm
Location: United Kingdom

This one's silly but funny.

Post by Plavt » Sun, 26 Feb 2006 10:59 pm

On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him. He asks the stewardess for a coffee where upon the parrot squawks, "And get me a whisky you cow!" The stewardess, flustered, brings back a whisky for the parrot and forgets the coffee.
When this omission is pointed out to her the parrot drains its glass and bawls, "And get me another whisky you bitch". Quite upset, the girl comes back shaking with another whisky but still no coffee.

Unaccustomed to such slackness the man tries the parrot's approach, "I've asked you twice for a coffee, go and get it now or I'll kick your ass".

Next moment both he and the parrot have been wrenched up and thrown out of the emergency exit by two burly stewards. Plunging downwards the parrot turns to him and says, "For someone who can't fly you're a lippy bastard!"

User avatar
Baron Greenback
Reporter
Reporter
Posts: 847
Joined: Mon, 20 Jun 2005 12:30 pm
Location: Singapore

Post by Baron Greenback » Mon, 27 Feb 2006 1:07 pm

very good Plavt - made me chuckle :D
"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools."
Hemingway

User avatar
donno
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 215
Joined: Wed, 25 Jan 2006 2:37 pm
Location: somewhere on Earth..

Post by donno » Mon, 27 Feb 2006 1:15 pm

hahahah... so funny... hahah

User avatar
Vaucluse
Director
Director
Posts: 3292
Joined: Sun, 10 Jul 2005 2:47 pm

Post by Vaucluse » Mon, 27 Feb 2006 7:21 pm

donno wrote:hahahah... so funny... hahah


You actually undrstood that, donno? Doubt it . . .


Funny, Plavt
......................................................

'nuff said Image

User avatar
Carpe Diem
Manager
Manager
Posts: 1587
Joined: Tue, 12 Jul 2005 11:29 pm
Location: Singapore

Post by Carpe Diem » Mon, 27 Feb 2006 7:24 pm

I don't get it. Was the parrot gay?
La vie est trop courte, profitons de chaque instant

User avatar
donno
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 215
Joined: Wed, 25 Jan 2006 2:37 pm
Location: somewhere on Earth..

Post by donno » Mon, 27 Feb 2006 8:32 pm

Carpe Diem, is that a real name???

Miss Carpe Diem sounds pretty

User avatar
Wild Rover
Regular
Regular
Posts: 134
Joined: Thu, 08 Sep 2005 11:52 pm
Location: Singapore

Post by Wild Rover » Mon, 27 Feb 2006 9:13 pm

Carpe Diem wrote:I don't get it. Was the parrot gay?
Actually CD you might be on to something. Perhaps the 'princess' from the other joke was actually the parrot in drag??

These jokes reminded me of an allegedly true story (as reported by one of those 'Airline' documentaries back in the UK) where some female cabin crew was offering drinks from the bar to the passengers. One snooty woman said "I'll have a G&T please, that's a gin and tonic to you dear". Quick as a flash the stewardess said "And would you like ice and lemon with that madam? That's frozen water and a piece of fruit to you"!!

Would have loved to have seen the woman's face :lol:
What's worse, ignorance or apathy? I don't know and I don't care

User avatar
Carpe Diem
Manager
Manager
Posts: 1587
Joined: Tue, 12 Jul 2005 11:29 pm
Location: Singapore

Post by Carpe Diem » Mon, 27 Feb 2006 9:53 pm

Although I have to acknowledge that on a specific Saturday night I could have been mistaken for a (huge) parrot, I can confirm (sorry to disappoint donno) that I am not gay...

Quite the opposite in fact :devil:
La vie est trop courte, profitons de chaque instant

User avatar
Wild Rover
Regular
Regular
Posts: 134
Joined: Thu, 08 Sep 2005 11:52 pm
Location: Singapore

Post by Wild Rover » Tue, 28 Feb 2006 12:33 am

Carpe Diem wrote:Although I have to acknowledge that on a specific Saturday night I could have been mistaken for a (huge) parrot, I can confirm (sorry to disappoint donno) that I am not gay...

Quite the opposite in fact :devil:
Awww come on CD let's see the pic? I know your display was allegedly good enough for you to win 1st prize, so you should be proud enough to share.

Otherwise I think Jolmar at least may have some 'evidence' but being a fellow countryman may prefer to spare your 'plumage' from public display!
What's worse, ignorance or apathy? I don't know and I don't care

User avatar
Vaucluse
Director
Director
Posts: 3292
Joined: Sun, 10 Jul 2005 2:47 pm

Post by Vaucluse » Tue, 28 Feb 2006 7:39 am

Carpe Diem wrote:Although I have to acknowledge that on a specific Saturday night I could have been mistaken for a (huge) parrot, I can confirm (sorry to disappoint donno) that I am not gay...

Quite the opposite in fact :devil:



Umm, what's the opposite of being a parrot, CD? :-|
......................................................

'nuff said Image

User avatar
Cheekybeek
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 395
Joined: Mon, 31 Oct 2005 8:41 pm

Post by Cheekybeek » Tue, 28 Feb 2006 8:48 am

There's NOTHING wrong with being a parrot!

Post Reply
  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Return to “Leisure Chat, Jokes, Rubbish”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 0 guests