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Year of the Dog and so on...

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sapphire
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Year of the Dog and so on...

Postby sapphire » Thu, 26 Jan 2006 10:59 am

On the first day God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I'll give you back the other ten." So God agreed.

On the second day God created the monkey. God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty-year life span." The monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" And God agreed.

On the third day God created the cow. God said, "You must go to the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years." The cow said, "That's kind of a! tough life you want me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty and I'll give back the other forty." And God agreed again.

On the fourth day God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. I'll give you twenty years." Man said, "What? Only twenty years! Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty the cow gave back and the ten the monkey gave back and the ten the dog gave back, that makes eighty, okay?" "Okay," said God, "You've got a deal."

So the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy ourselves; for the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you, have a good year of the Dog.
It's not getting any smarter out there. You have to come to terms with stupidity, and make it work for you.

Em Eye
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Postby Em Eye » Thu, 26 Jan 2006 11:07 am

That's fantastic Sapphire.

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Cheekybeek
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Postby Cheekybeek » Thu, 26 Jan 2006 11:58 am

love it! :D

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cheatercock
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Postby cheatercock » Fri, 27 Jan 2006 1:03 pm

And the greedy Woman-folks additionaly snatched the days left by my chicken community. That is why they lay eggs for some years of their life.

Just a piece of information incase you were on wrong track last year.

"Many web sites say 2005 is a Chinese Rooster Year. Actually, 2005 is a Green Female Chicken (Hen) Year, because there is no male chicken year in the Chinese calendar.
Therefore, we would like to say 2005 is a Chinese Chicken Year."
Image

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Global Citizen
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Postby Global Citizen » Mon, 30 Jan 2006 10:48 pm

All this bird talk has left me wondering, why do the Chinese call hookers chickens?
One man's meat is another's poison.

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Quasimodo
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Postby Quasimodo » Tue, 31 Jan 2006 7:56 am

Global Citizen wrote:All this bird talk has left me wondering, why do the Chinese call hookers chickens?


Possibly there was a severe shortage of women at one time and - well - chickens my seem pretty to some people . . .
One in the hand is worth two of something

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Postby Plavt » Tue, 31 Jan 2006 8:14 am

Quasimodo wrote:
Possibly there was a severe shortage of women at one time and - well - chickens my seem pretty to some people . . .


Until somebody mentions bird flu.........


Plavt.

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Siong2
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Re: Year of the Dog and so on...

Postby Siong2 » Wed, 01 Feb 2006 7:15 pm

sapphire wrote:Life has now been explained to you, have a good year of the Dog.


Nice one. :D


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