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by Bubbles » Fri, 27 Jan 2006 10:31 pm
Hi Global and SMS
I know SMS is on our side, he knows how hard it is. Anything that will give me a prod in the right direction is welcome. I think I said, I've even been driven to putting in the words 'Smoking, cancer, throat, mouth' into Google and then asking for Images. I have been so tempted to go down the shop and buy some, and that's the only way to stop myself. There are some gruesome pics for sure. And I know, I know, it's like being a spectre at the feast.....someone always smokes.....but for ME, it's shock tactics that work.
I am going to try very, very hard not to be one of those evangelizing non smokers. I have sworn to try to NOT mention smoking when out in a gang, socially or at work. There's nothing worse. Mind you, if someone ASKED my opinion, then I'll try to help.
It's true Global, there has to be the urge to give up. Not sure why I decided two weeks ago that this was my time. I think it was after going out to the pub the weekend before and having lots of cigs, a drink etc. When I got up the next morning my clothes stank, and I looked at myself in the mirror and said, 'Enough.' And that was it.
Now, two weeks on, I can smell someone who smokes a mile off. If they're in front of me in the queue at the shop, if they've had a ciggie, I can smell it. Horrible. And there was me thinking, if I chew gum it'll not be noticeable. Crazy isn't it? But, that's for them and I am me. I will not preach. But I really hope to God that this time I keep with the programme. Yes, I'm eating more, but I'm being kind to myself and giving it a month of being easy, then hopefully I'll be far enough away from the desperation to put a diet into place. Pointless trying to juggle two heavy loads at once.
Right, enough about that, what're you all up to? It's Friday night for you, and boring, boring Friday (have you got those files I asked for) afternoon at the office. They must think I'm working like a little trouper here, ha, bloody ha. If only they knew.
Saw a butterfly today, amazing, as it's January. Is it only me who wishes she was that creature? Fluttering by, no ringing people, no files, just whooshing by looking cute.
Sigh.........never mind, just 2 and a half hours to go.......
Bubbs.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Dylan Thomas.