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Common courtesy?

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Wham
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Post by Wham » Tue, 06 Dec 2005 10:08 pm

OK, BREAK IT UP - Before the color wars started the last thing that i read was that Happy Earth Girl girl was telling Saphire that she was wrong - and i was kind of enjoying it.
"He who makes a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man." Samuel Johnson

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Rose_YG
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Post by Rose_YG » Tue, 06 Dec 2005 10:15 pm

well it's going to be Christmas.. so the air is full of colours and love :D
"Every day is Christmas and every night is new year's eve... "

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sapphire
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Post by sapphire » Tue, 06 Dec 2005 11:45 pm

Wham wrote:OK, BREAK IT UP - Before the color wars started the last thing that i read was that Happy Earth Girl girl was telling Saphire that she was wrong - and i was kind of enjoying it.
Wham, cheap thrills now? :P

PS. Who is Happy Earth Girl?
It's not getting any smarter out there. You have to come to terms with stupidity, and make it work for you.

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Rose_YG
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Post by Rose_YG » Tue, 06 Dec 2005 11:48 pm

I think he is referring to the poster 'earthfriendly'.
"Every day is Christmas and every night is new year's eve... "

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sapphire
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Post by sapphire » Wed, 07 Dec 2005 7:58 am

Ah, thank you Ma'am, my brain wasn't functioning at that late hour.
It's not getting any smarter out there. You have to come to terms with stupidity, and make it work for you.

dot dot dot
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Post by dot dot dot » Wed, 07 Dec 2005 10:14 pm

Wind In My Hair wrote:
Rose_YG wrote:Try the other way around, open the door for them and see what happens... :wink:
i sometimes do. they usually refuse to walk through, and insist on taking the door and letting me go first. like i said, of course there are those who don't have good manners but in my experience these are the minority and what touches me is that young boys are doing the same, which suggests to me that they are learning this from watching how their dads behave. i am very encouraged.

ps: and if i did hold the door for a person or group of persons, whether male or female, it would be cos i wanted to, and not to get a thank you. who cares whether they do or not if you're really just trying to facilitate traffic flow? id rather not hold the door open than hold it open then get immediately ticked off that no one said thanks. life is too short to get frustrated at little things like that. :wink:
you gotta be joking here Wimh... :-|

Eric

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Post by Wham » Wed, 07 Dec 2005 11:01 pm

Eric,

You hit the nail on the head. I could go on and on but this topic is beginning to bore me. WHAM
"He who makes a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man." Samuel Johnson

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Wind In My Hair
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Post by Wind In My Hair » Thu, 08 Dec 2005 12:02 am

Eric from the Netherlands wrote:you gotta be joking here Wimh... :-|
why, can't take it that you're not the only prince charming in singapore? :P

seriously i was not joking. but let's drop it. i'm tired of all the local bashing that goes on here. common courtesy indeed. :roll:

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rakyomin
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Sorry to hear that..

Post by rakyomin » Fri, 09 Dec 2005 5:47 am

I am not sure why Singaporeans (not all Singaporeans, of course) care less to another people nowadays, well by common sense if someone fell over to me, I should unconditionally give a helping hand, instead of looking at the poor person indifferently. According to my parents, people in their generations were unlike modern Singaporeans... I wonder what has gone wrong.

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Post by Mary Hatch Bailey » Fri, 09 Dec 2005 6:03 am

Here's a little story that may lend some insight. I was at Mt. E this week with my son, waiting for the valet to bring up our car. An older woman, in her 60s I suppose, Singaporean, tripped on the speed bump in the car park and when down like the Titanic. I rushed to help her up, no one else was, and she was fine but her beaded necklace broke and scattered.

I started to pick up the beads, and she kept saying: don't want, don't want. But a few more people started to pick them up too and I let them have at it and eventually she had them all and went onher way.

Forgetting the door holding argument for a moment. I'm wondering if she found the fact that I helped her up even more embarrasing. Perhaps since everyone else pretty much turned their head, if culturally, this is the kind thing to do: pretend it didn't happen so the person who falls is not embarrassed or does not lose face.

Just a thought. I'm glad I helped her and she has her beads back. When you have children, everything you do is an object lesson.

:)

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Post by Cuchu » Fri, 09 Dec 2005 6:43 am

Eric from the Netherlands wrote:
Wind In My Hair wrote:
Rose_YG wrote:Try the other way around, open the door for them and see what happens... :wink:
i sometimes do. they usually refuse to walk through, and insist on taking the door and letting me go first. like i said, of course there are those who don't have good manners but in my experience these are the minority and what touches me is that young boys are doing the same, which suggests to me that they are learning this from watching how their dads behave. i am very encouraged.

ps: and if i did hold the door for a person or group of persons, whether male or female, it would be cos i wanted to, and not to get a thank you. who cares whether they do or not if you're really just trying to facilitate traffic flow? id rather not hold the door open than hold it open then get immediately ticked off that no one said thanks. life is too short to get frustrated at little things like that. :wink:
you gotta be joking here Wimh... :-|

Eric
I would just take it as a custom thing or maybe metropolitan syndrome as I found it in Tokyo, New York and other big cities.
But I find it highly ironic Eric that you made the above comment towards a local person's comment when in the mistreated maids' thread where it was discussed basically about basic human rights to receive what they deserve (regarding pay and days off) and to be treated with basic respect at least (that is to be treated as humans, not as stress punching bags for example) when you said that we non-locals shouldn't make comments that would imply as if we know better which I don't reckon is the point actually..., again I just find it highly ironic...

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Post by Vaucluse » Fri, 09 Dec 2005 10:41 am

It seems the wheels have come off this site in the past week and I am confronted with something akin to

Image

I know WIMH is going to on my back like a tonne of bricks, but face the fact that common courtesy is virtually non-existent here.

How many times do I open doors, keep lifts open and generally put into practise what I was taught to be respectful and show good manners towards everyone and anyone. Although 9 out of 10 times I get nothing in return (NOT that I am doing it for the thanks) I will continue and shame some of the worst morons that even turn up their noses at me... Like in trains when I tell kids to get up for the elderly - screw them if they feel offended.

Let's see . . . other examples - helped an uncle off the ground and Mrs 'Cluse got him some water when he tripped and fell over on the footpath (sidewalk to those of you from the US of A) - not another person stoped to help - just the usual rubbernecking prats.

I remember something about Japanese mentioned here, vis-a-vis manners and politeness . . . . hahahahhahaha - that's like comparing apples to sea cucumber. The service alone in Japan puts anyone and everyone in the rest of Asia (and the 'West') to shame and I don't think it's a matter of economic development - usually the 'lower' ones position, the mor pleasant they are towards others - 'higher' ups (see this in terms of salesperosn and customer)
I find the service I receive in India, Sapphy, brilliant.

Damn, forgot the rest of the contributions . . .
......................................................

'nuff said Image

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sapphire
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Post by sapphire » Fri, 09 Dec 2005 11:39 am

Welcome back Vaucluse. Service industry in India is pretty good I agree. It was about politeness like saying 'Thank You' etc. which Indians are not so good at. And comparing Bombay and Calcutta with Tokyo was just not fair.
It's not getting any smarter out there. You have to come to terms with stupidity, and make it work for you.

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Rose_YG
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Post by Rose_YG » Fri, 09 Dec 2005 1:31 pm

Cuchu wrote:
Eric from the Netherlands wrote:
Wind In My Hair wrote: i sometimes do. they usually refuse to walk through, and insist on taking the door and letting me go first. like i said, of course there are those who don't have good manners but in my experience these are the minority and what touches me is that young boys are doing the same, which suggests to me that they are learning this from watching how their dads behave. i am very encouraged.

ps: and if i did hold the door for a person or group of persons, whether male or female, it would be cos i wanted to, and not to get a thank you. who cares whether they do or not if you're really just trying to facilitate traffic flow? id rather not hold the door open than hold it open then get immediately ticked off that no one said thanks. life is too short to get frustrated at little things like that. :wink:
you gotta be joking here Wimh... :-|

Eric
I would just take it as a custom thing or maybe metropolitan syndrome as I found it in Tokyo, New York and other big cities.
But I find it highly ironic Eric that you made the above comment towards a local person's comment when in the mistreated maids' thread where it was discussed basically about basic human rights to receive what they deserve (regarding pay and days off) and to be treated with basic respect at least (that is to be treated as humans, not as stress punching bags for example) when you said that we non-locals shouldn't make comments that would imply as if we know better which I don't reckon is the point actually..., again I just find it highly ironic...
I don't see any form of disrespect shown here by Eric from his comment above.

I can't equate manners to being a thing of custom.It's a separate entity altogether.
I can go on and on about this..people not pressing the lift for others and the door just get slammed on their face,people in buses not giving up their seats/pretending to be sleeping etc.. but the fact remains the same.
I think that's the reason why we had signboards pasted everywhere telling us what to do and what not to do.Remember that singapore had run the 'Courtesy Campaign' before? That was a good move and effort as well as a reminder.

Cheers :wink:
YG
"Every day is Christmas and every night is new year's eve... "

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sapphire
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Post by sapphire » Fri, 09 Dec 2005 1:40 pm

Umm...I for one didn't even understand what Cuchu was trying to say. :???:
Its almost five lines of one sentence!!
It's not getting any smarter out there. You have to come to terms with stupidity, and make it work for you.

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