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by Bubbles » Sat, 15 Oct 2005 5:59 pm
The reasons I said not to ring the number...here they are (and for the EADG here's an insight into a female's mind, this female mind, not every female mind, we all think differently)........
1. If they had been 'having an affair' as it's so sweetly put (as opposed to him creeping out to shag someone else)....then he's dishonouring his wife/partner at home, and why should the burden of the huge grief at having to actually speak to the slapper be on HER shoulders? (yes, yes, he's a slapper too)
2. The wife is the innocent one here and has the higher ground, if there IS any ground to make up it is up to him to see that she has all the answers and not for the poor girl to go grubbing around trying to chase up mucky facts.
3. She should ask HIM as HE is the one she has invested time, love, effort and trust in. It's HIM who's stuck the knife in. The lover has too, but at one remove....why should this innocent woman dirty her hands with rif raf like the 'other woman?'
4. When this all blew up in his face...i.e....when wife told him....don't you think the very first thing he'd have done was to warn the lover not to say anything.....yet another indication of lost closeness between man/wife...that he would run (on the phone) to another woman....who would want to be part of the charade then? Not the wife, surely? This should be way beneath her. Get HIM to talk, yes, but DO NOT give this other female any importance by bringing her into the discussion face to face. Who knows, the lover may have been waiting for this to happen, hoping her lover would fall into her arms when it was all out in the open....and if that is the case do you think this person would have thought how terribly hurtful the disclosures would be to the wife....YEAH, RIGHT!
The only problem with the 'flow' of this scenario is the fact that the hubby gave the phone to his wife...........don't you think that's very strange???
Please, please don't let this be some made up story just to get us writing. Sorry, sorry, I know it's almost certainly a real story, and a very sad one............but the fact that he GAVE a moby with potentially damning messages on, STILL INTACT to his wife in INCREDIBLE. This guy is either insane, extremely under stress, forgetful or wanting to be caught.......
Which gives the situation a whole new spin.......
Whatever the problem, this must be sorted out between the two main protagonists..........and not with some walk on character (the lover)......yes, she may very well turn out to be a main player later on in this drama, but as of NOW...the only two who need to act in this are man and wife.....
Yes, my gut reaction would be to hurt him as much as possible, by money, dishonour, even violence, but in my heart I'd know I'd come off worse in the eyes of the world for these things.....but they are hard to eradicate in a human being, feelings of rage and betrayal.....so with that in mind, maybe a bit of plastic bashing is the very least someone would get and think themselves lucky at it!!!!
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Dylan Thomas.
) 
