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Language of European Union

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Posts: 8
Joined: Sun, 06 Feb 2005
Location: Istanbul, Turkey

Language of European Union

Postby tolgattt » Sun, 28 Aug 2005 2:21 am

European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English
will be the official language of the European Union rather than
German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that
English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-
year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this
will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be
expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have
always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the
languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th"
with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords
kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl
riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in
ze forst plas.

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl

Tolga Tarik Tiryaki

Posts: 285
Joined: Mon, 09 May 2005
Location: Perth, WA

Postby stefania » Sun, 28 Aug 2005 12:34 pm

Muahahaha!! I can read and understand German! :P

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Joined: Sun, 10 Jul 2005

Postby Vaucluse » Mon, 29 Aug 2005 9:24 am

Finally a language for all - Esperanto eat your heart out.

(an oldie but a goodie, Tollgat)

'nuff said Image

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Strong Eagle
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Joined: Sat, 10 Jul 2004
Location: Off The Red Dot

Re: Language of European Union

Postby Strong Eagle » Mon, 29 Aug 2005 9:41 am

tolgattt wrote:If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl


Looks like Singlish to me.


Postby Brazilian » Mon, 29 Aug 2005 10:24 am

Hmm...why not French?

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