Singapore Expats Forum

Why aren't children taught to pick up after themselves?

Discuss about the latest news & interesting topics, real life experience or other out of topic discussions with locals & expatriates in Singapore.

MnM

Why aren't children taught to pick up after themselves?

Postby MnM » Mon, 22 Aug 2005 2:54 pm

Im visiting a relative here and am appalled to find that she is treated like a maid and slave by her children one of whom is a teenager. Of course she has herself to blame because she has not taught them to pick up after themselves.

I notice this is common all over the world, but apparently more in Asia. I have noticed this in three different households, and one was an expat western house. Last night I was in a cab and the guy said he his washing machine had broken down and he had no money to buy one, so i asked how old were the 4 children, he said between the ages of 8-15 and i asked why he did not tell them all to learn to wash their own clothes by hand for now instead of him having to hunt for extra money to buy a machine or putting the burden on his wife; he said "used to it already".

Are there parents out there reading this who treat their children with kid gloves? I would love to know WHY children are overprotected this way and not taught discipline.

Yes, i am told its because hired help is cheap, they have maids etc but even when i had a housekeeper, i was still told to take my place to the sink after dinner or make my bed or put my toys away, etc. Whats so abusive about teaching children to do normal household chores?

MnM

error in typing

Postby MnM » Mon, 22 Aug 2005 2:56 pm

sorry was trying to say "take my PLATES" to the sink, not place

User avatar
beenhere10years
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 399
Joined: Mon, 23 May 2005
Location: Up here surrounded by big, green trees

Postby beenhere10years » Mon, 22 Aug 2005 3:44 pm

We struggle with this all the time. We insist our kids do somethings for themselves, but it's hard: their academics are more demanding, their school day is longer, they have many more after school activities than we ever did. And then of course there is the maid --- who must be reminded constantly not to pick up their rooms or clean up after them. Its a chore for me to get them to do chores, but I do it so they will be responsible, contributing adults. I hate the idea of rasing nothing but 'consumers.'

In this relatively nouveau riche society, I see a lot of spoiling going on as well. Maids chasing 7 year olds around trying to spoon feed them is an example I find particularly loathesome. People driving the biggest, newest Mercedes without the slightest idea of road etiquette, because as first generation drivers they were never taught.

I think at the end of the day you have to raise your children as best you can, and if it means seeing examples of what NOT to do, well then, there is a lesson in that as well.
When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.

-- jack handy

MnM

Postby MnM » Mon, 22 Aug 2005 6:33 pm

I grew up in USA but have lived in a few countries. My parents made me do the usual chores and now as a mother I teach my kids the same, start them young, say please pick your clothes and put it in the laundry basket, if it doesnt it gets left there to rot!! And there've been times theyve come to me screaming no clean underwear, i shrug and say- it was yr responsibility to put PICK up yr dirty clothes and PUT them in the basket, how hard is that to do? They scream, shout, cry, swear, sulk, and they learn, one way or another.

How many minutes does it take to throw underwear on the ground? how many mins does it take to pick up from the floor and put in the basket?
How many mins to pick up plate they ate from at dining table and take and leave in the kitchen sink?
How many minutes to pick up thrash and throw in bin on the way to ball game?

No time?

User avatar
beenhere10years
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 399
Joined: Mon, 23 May 2005
Location: Up here surrounded by big, green trees

Postby beenhere10years » Mon, 22 Aug 2005 6:37 pm

I agree with you. Parents today suck at:

making boundries
sticking to rules
taking away priviledges when rules are broken
saying 'no'

They try too hard to be a friend, when what kids really need is a parent.
When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.



-- jack handy

User avatar
sundaymorningstaple
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 34273
Joined: Thu, 11 Nov 2004
Location: Still Fishing!
Contact:

Postby sundaymorningstaple » Mon, 22 Aug 2005 8:47 pm

beenhere10years wrote:I agree with you. Parents today suck at:

making boundries
sticking to rules
taking away priviledges when rules are broken
saying 'no'

They try too hard to be a friend, when what kids really need is a parent.


My kids say I'm damned good at it! :mrgreen:

Unfortunately, that's why they go to their mother behind my back! :cry:

User avatar
beenhere10years
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 399
Joined: Mon, 23 May 2005
Location: Up here surrounded by big, green trees

Postby beenhere10years » Mon, 22 Aug 2005 9:21 pm

the old switcherooo
When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.



-- jack handy

User avatar
banana
Reporter
Reporter
Posts: 961
Joined: Tue, 24 May 2005

Postby banana » Tue, 23 Aug 2005 12:35 am

SMS that is awesome. Noted for future reference.
some signatures are more equal than others

Galaxies

Postby Galaxies » Tue, 23 Aug 2005 2:30 am

Which planet are you all from? Don't you know kids of the 21st century 'rule' and in the coming centuries it is going to get even better than today. How, you may ask or wonder!!! Well, to start with, there are going to be robots doing all the work for us. They will be programmed in such a way that no one will have to lift a finger to do anything and robots will be there to take care of all our whims and fancies!!! You may ask what will the kids do when this happens on a massive scale? The answer is very simple. The kids will be busy doing the programming , maintenance and inventing new robots and there will be no 'cleaning up after' the kids because they will not have toys that will be have to be put into little toy containers after they have finished utilizing them. No, in fact , their toys will be too big to fit into any real or imagineable containers and parents will have to just content themselves with what they find when they enter their kids' rooms.

In fact, children in the 21st century will look nothing like the children of the past centuries because they will have disposable clothes, so no washing needed. They will not consume the same kinds of foods as the children of the past centuries because they are not doing that now! The food they will consume will be even faster than what we have these days and there will be no problems with their weight gain either because they are getting heavier as I type. No need to worry about some of the health issues because medicine would have advanced so well ahead than what it has been in the past centuries, complicated procedures will be performed very easily by Alien Medicine which will be taught to us by the beings from other and outer galaxies. There will be no shortage of doctors, hospitals or even medican equipment because by then we would already have become the new inhabitants of the new galaxies and planets!!

So let's stop bickering about mundane issues and let's all join hands together in an anticipation of a wonderful, exciting, joyous and fruitful FUTURE :lol: :D

User avatar
beenhere10years
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 399
Joined: Mon, 23 May 2005
Location: Up here surrounded by big, green trees

Postby beenhere10years » Tue, 23 Aug 2005 6:36 am

Galaxies: Call Cartain Kirk, I think the Enterprise forgot to beam you up when it went into warp speed without you.
Last edited by beenhere10years on Tue, 23 Aug 2005 10:18 am, edited 1 time in total.
When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.



-- jack handy

User avatar
sundaymorningstaple
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 34273
Joined: Thu, 11 Nov 2004
Location: Still Fishing!
Contact:

Postby sundaymorningstaple » Tue, 23 Aug 2005 9:33 am

Reminds me of an old song......"In the year 2525...."

sms

User avatar
sapphire
Manager
Manager
Posts: 2365
Joined: Sun, 17 Apr 2005

Postby sapphire » Tue, 23 Aug 2005 9:35 am

Lol, I like galaxies' vision of the future, hope I'm reborn as one of those space age kids!! Sounds too cool!
It's not getting any smarter out there. You have to come to terms with stupidity, and make it work for you.

User avatar
samantha
Chatter
Chatter
Posts: 226
Joined: Sat, 23 Jul 2005
Location: Singapore

Postby samantha » Tue, 23 Aug 2005 10:48 am

Haha.. If they go through a lot of leadership camps, they learn discipline and to pick up after themselves... At least that was what was instilled into me... And i still keep to it till today... :lol: 8) :lol:

My solution, send all children for basic military training... when they learn to cook their own food with twigs as fuel, wash their own clothes... Alll manually... Haha.. :wink: :wink:
I'm so stupid that I surprise myself sometimes...


  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Return to “General Discussions”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests