pirate

[Carpe Diem]

A guy walks into a bar and sees in the corner another man with a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and an eye patch. He gets a drink from the bartender and takes it to the man and sits down. He says, "You're a pirate, aren't you." The man says, "Yar, I be a pirate." The man asks how he got the peg leg. Pirate says, "I fell over board and a shark bit it off." The man asks about his hand. The Pirate says, "I fell off the yardarm in a storm and lost his hand." The guy asks about his eye. The Pirate says, "I was walking along the beach when I looked up a seagull pooped in my eye." The man asks, "and that made you lose your eye?" The pirate says, "No, but it was the first day with me hook!"