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Thinking Problem

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Strong Eagle
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Thinking Problem

Postby Strong Eagle » Thu, 16 Jun 2005 1:26 pm

Subject: A Thinking Man's Dilemma

It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then -- to loosen up. Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.

I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.

That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I had turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother's.

I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself. I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"

One day the boss called me in. He said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job." This gave me a lot to think about.

I came home early after my conversation with the boss. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking..." "I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!" "But Honey, surely it's not that serious." "It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver. "You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking, we won't have any money!"

"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently. She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama. "I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door. I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I roared into the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors... They didn't open. The library was closed.

To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night. Leaning on the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye.

"Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked. You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinker's Anonymous poster. Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker.

I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it as "Porky's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting.

I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed...easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking. I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me.

Today, I registered to vote as a Republican...

stefania
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Postby stefania » Thu, 16 Jun 2005 2:30 pm

Bwahahahaha!! I was just waiting for that last bit! :lol:

SE succeeds in his latest spade of US humour! :D

But of course, life is unfair. :P

Q4SE

Postby Q4SE » Thu, 16 Jun 2005 3:20 pm

My question to SE, the Thinker: Are you suggesting that we stop thinking now? If so , what are we going to do with that 'thing' that is resting above our painful shoulders after carrying the heavy burden/the cross of this life?

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Postby stefania » Thu, 16 Jun 2005 3:26 pm

Oh no, you've caught the thinking bug as well! :D


It was just a joke, don't take it too literally. Chill. 8)

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Postby Strong Eagle » Thu, 16 Jun 2005 4:06 pm

Q4SE wrote:My question to SE, the Thinker: Are you suggesting that we stop thinking now? If so , what are we going to do with that 'thing' that is resting above our painful shoulders after carrying the heavy burden/the cross of this life?


As my original post noted, you join the Republican party and then you can vote for George "Chimpus Moronus" Bush and his minions.

As for the head... I dunno... maybe you can use it as a place to put your hat.

Guest

Postby Guest » Thu, 16 Jun 2005 4:37 pm

Strong Eagle wrote:
Q4SE wrote:My question to SE, the Thinker: Are you suggesting that we stop thinking now? If so , what are we going to do with that 'thing' that is resting above our painful shoulders after carrying the heavy burden/the cross of this life?


As my original post noted, you join the Republican party and then you can vote for George "Chimpus Moronus" Bush and his minions.

As for the head... I don't know... maybe you can use it as a place to put your hat.


I can't stand the guy so that's never going to happen!!!

As for my head, it is just to big to fit into any hat. So this is never going to happen either, it seems!!! Besides, even with a hat on I have heard people say they can't stop thinking :wink:

2Rodin

Postby 2Rodin » Thu, 16 Jun 2005 4:43 pm

Anonymous wrote:
Strong Eagle wrote:
Q4SE wrote:My question to SE, the Thinker: Are you suggesting that we stop thinking now? If so , what are we going to do with that 'thing' that is resting above our painful shoulders after carrying the heavy burden/the cross of this life?


As my original post noted, you join the Republican party and then you can vote for George "Chimpus Moronus" Bush and his minions.

As for the head... I don't know... maybe you can use it as a place to put your hat.


I can't stand the guy so that's never going to happen!!!

As for my head, it is just to big to fit into any hat. So this is never going to happen either, it seems!!! Besides, even with a hat on I have heard people say they can't stop thinking :wink:


Hey, Rodin, I did not mean to be impertinent because I wasn't thinking!!!


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