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Need advise on helper

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JoanneChoo13
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Need advise on helper

Post by JoanneChoo13 » Sun, 19 May 2024 8:08 pm

Hi All,
i would like to employ maid to take care my new born baby. Will you ask the helper to sleep with the infant baby? Or will the baby sleeping with you all? i cant cope myself so i enage maid. But also i scare if i put her sleep with my baby in the room, some how i feel unsafe, and dunno the helper will do something ? Any advise on this?

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abbby
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by abbby » Mon, 20 May 2024 9:25 am

It is alright to have the baby sleep in the same room as the helper. Preferably baby on the cot and helper with her own bed and slightly away from each other. Usually it's good to have a cctv which can have a view of the baby. You can try out for a week or two and see how it goes. It has to be a helper you can trust..
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made. - Groucho Marx (1890-1977)

JoanneChoo13
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by JoanneChoo13 » Mon, 20 May 2024 12:49 pm

if i install CCTV to the whole room (maid+baby), issit not right if the maid is sleeping? will it offend her?

tiktok
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by tiktok » Mon, 20 May 2024 4:55 pm

No less offended than your child will be when it learns you let it sleep with a stranger shortly after birth.
I not troll/wacko/spammer.
Me no expat. Me foreigner.

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sundaymorningstaple
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by sundaymorningstaple » Tue, 21 May 2024 12:11 pm

I believe there would/could be repercussions if the whole room is covered by CCTV. However, a baby monitor camera with sound connected to the parents room is perfectly permissible. It should be placed in such a position as to only provide a view of the baby in the cot/crib and not on the whole room which would be invading the maid's privacy/modesty.

This just a quick search on Amazon. Can find much cheaper locally but not sure of quality and capabilities but gives you a place to start......

https://www.amazon.sg/CuboAi-Plus-Smart ... 238&sr=8-2
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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abbby
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by abbby » Tue, 21 May 2024 6:31 pm

CCTV only facing the baby or baby monitor
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made. - Groucho Marx (1890-1977)

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Strong Eagle
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by Strong Eagle » Wed, 22 May 2024 11:08 am

sundaymorningstaple wrote:
Tue, 21 May 2024 12:11 pm
I believe there would/could be repercussions if the whole room is covered by CCTV. However, a baby monitor camera with sound connected to the parents room is perfectly permissible. It should be placed in such a position as to only provide a view of the baby in the cot/crib and not on the whole room which would be invading the maid's privacy/modesty.

This just a quick search on Amazon. Can find much cheaper locally but not sure of quality and capabilities but gives you a place to start......

https://www.amazon.sg/CuboAi-Plus-Smart ... 238&sr=8-2
This is still an invasion of the maid's privacy, unless you're talking about no audio. Otherwise, she can't even have a conversation on her phone in the privacy of her room without being overheard.

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sundaymorningstaple
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by sundaymorningstaple » Wed, 22 May 2024 1:28 pm

True.
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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malcontent
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by malcontent » Wed, 22 May 2024 10:17 pm

We’ve had a helper for decades and my wife has had helpers almost her whole life (she is from Indonesia). In general, Indonesian maids tend to be submissive and will typically sleep wherever they are told to. However, they do have rights, and we believe as an employer we should always (at least) give them the option to sleep in their own private room/space. I believe this is also spelled out under the terms and condition you are supposed to abide by as an employer. So if you want to pursue this, at least give them the real option not to. Perhaps even more important — if you are concerned about your child and want someone to be close to attend to them, that someone is better to be you. You are missing out on a bonding opportunity that you might regret later. I have regrets about leaving our kids with the maid far too often. I often joke, when it came to raising our kids… when the going gets tough, the maid gets going. But now that our kids are teenagers, I should have treasured those moments.
Every great and deep difficulty bears in itself its own solution. It forces us to change our thinking in order to find it - Niels Bohr

Lisafuller
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by Lisafuller » Thu, 23 May 2024 3:45 pm

JoanneChoo13 wrote:
Sun, 19 May 2024 8:08 pm
Hi All,
i would like to employ maid to take care my new born baby. Will you ask the helper to sleep with the infant baby? Or will the baby sleeping with you all? i cant cope myself so i enage maid. But also i scare if i put her sleep with my baby in the room, some how i feel unsafe, and dunno the helper will do something ? Any advise on this?
We hired a helper to assist with childcare duties after my daughter was born because it was too much for me and at the time paternity leave was not what it is today. Had her sleep in the same room as my girl so she could be responsive in case of any emergencies. To the point about the helper possibly hurting the baby, this is where it's important to exercise discretion in picking someone you can trust.

Lisafuller
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by Lisafuller » Thu, 23 May 2024 3:46 pm

abbby wrote:
Mon, 20 May 2024 9:25 am
It is alright to have the baby sleep in the same room as the helper. Preferably baby on the cot and helper with her own bed and slightly away from each other. Usually it's good to have a cctv which can have a view of the baby. You can try out for a week or two and see how it goes. It has to be a helper you can trust..
Alternative is to have a baby monitor instead as a CCTV is pretty intrusive.

Lisafuller
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by Lisafuller » Thu, 23 May 2024 3:47 pm

JoanneChoo13 wrote:
Mon, 20 May 2024 12:49 pm
if i install CCTV to the whole room (maid+baby), issit not right if the maid is sleeping? will it offend her?
You have to do whatever you need to have peace of mind. If the helper is agreeable you may be able to install one. Otherwise a baby monitor that squarely faces the baby may be a better option.

Lisafuller
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by Lisafuller » Thu, 23 May 2024 3:48 pm

tiktok wrote:
Mon, 20 May 2024 4:55 pm
No less offended than your child will be when it learns you let it sleep with a stranger shortly after birth.
Pales in comparison to being referred to as "it", I'm sure. :P

Lisafuller
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by Lisafuller » Thu, 23 May 2024 3:50 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:
Tue, 21 May 2024 12:11 pm
I believe there would/could be repercussions if the whole room is covered by CCTV. However, a baby monitor camera with sound connected to the parents room is perfectly permissible. It should be placed in such a position as to only provide a view of the baby in the cot/crib and not on the whole room which would be invading the maid's privacy/modesty.

This just a quick search on Amazon. Can find much cheaper locally but not sure of quality and capabilities but gives you a place to start......

https://www.amazon.sg/CuboAi-Plus-Smart ... 238&sr=8-2
My thoughts exactly. Baby monitors are so advanced nowadays and a lot smaller so they can be installed within the crib as opposed to covering the whole room.

Lisafuller
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Re: Need advise on helper

Post by Lisafuller » Thu, 23 May 2024 3:50 pm

malcontent wrote:
Wed, 22 May 2024 10:17 pm
We’ve had a helper for decades and my wife has had helpers almost her whole life (she is from Indonesia). In general, Indonesian maids tend to be submissive and will typically sleep wherever they are told to. However, they do have rights, and we believe as an employer we should always (at least) give them the option to sleep in their own private room/space. I believe this is also spelled out under the terms and condition you are supposed to abide by as an employer. So if you want to pursue this, at least give them the real option not to. Perhaps even more important — if you are concerned about your child and want someone to be close to attend to them, that someone is better to be you. You are missing out on a bonding opportunity that you might regret later. I have regrets about leaving our kids with the maid far too often. I often joke, when it came to raising our kids… when the going gets tough, the maid gets going. But now that our kids are teenagers, I should have treasured those moments.
But what would the point be if not to keep a watchful eye over the baby when the parents are not able to?

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