Lisafuller wrote: ↑Wed, 27 Apr 2022 11:57 pm
smoulder wrote: ↑Tue, 26 Apr 2022 11:48 pm
Lisafuller wrote: ↑Tue, 26 Apr 2022 11:09 pm
At what point do you decide enough is enough? Frankly I’ve never understood how people could be so shameless just taking and taking over and over. I could understand if it was a time of genuine need, but if it was just to fund their latest frivolous purchases I’m not on board.
From what I can remember (some of this happened around 15 years ago), some of these people had done stupid things money wise and owed banks money. So what did they do - ask someone else (me) to "loan" them some more money to pay someone else. Of course, the request would come through my mother in law and wife (now ex). I guess this is a fairly common pattern of behavior.
Yup, I’d say it’s pretty common. Personally I don’t think I would ever oblige, but I’m sure it would be much harder to resist if I was actually put in such a situation.
If the request comes via the 'wife' (which in my case was the normal as she was the one who quit school to raise the younger six siblings after her father lost his job (with the British Army in Seletar Camp in 1963) she was in sec 3 when she quit) However, she always did without but as they were all grown adults they didn't mind (e.g., no pride) asking her to borrow from me as she always did without for them. When we married she was already 37. The problem is, and I'm sure smoulder will agree, blood is thicker than water, even if it's a husband, you come second. As a PR, who bought & paid for our resale HDB, I really couldn't afford to go through another divorce, etc. However, when Pa's Alzheimer's worsen and he had series of strokes which left him bedridden and required tube feeding at home for the last 18 months, we mounted up a lot of expenses of which we paid for and the siblings never lifted a finger to help either physically or fiscally. When he died, as the whole family were around, I told them straight to their faces that they would never see another cent from me or my family, I don't care what the issue is. You make your bed and you sleep in it. Some still don't speak to me, some have died, but frankly I don't give damn any more and the wife knows it.