Impulse purchase

[midlet2013]

Napoleon Hill said that the reason why most people dont reach their full potential is because they listen to their teachers, parents, relatives, friends , etc.

My dad is frugal and always preaches to live within means. However, if you read Rich Dad Poor Dad, you will realise that most of our parents are typical representation of Poor Dad syndrome, who never got over their fears and worse, passed it on to their kids, i.e. to play safe, live within means, dont dream big, take as safe a job as possible.

A rich guy will never teach his kid to save or live within means. They would rather teach their kids to earn more or at least try. And its not even about money alone. Its about life hacks, positive attitude, getting along with people, playing politics, etc etc. Most people live in a bubble and keep reinforcing their viewpoints to an extent that they never question they may be completely wrong. Unless you admit that you have shortcomings, how are you gonna change, improve and make ur kids a better version of u.

If I asked my dad what his shortcomings are , he will go blank for sure

If person is frugal as a principle, I would respect him. But if frugality is at the discretion of the person who has money n power, I wont respect such a person. If a person talks about frugality over a Nike and then spend 100 times the money on a 24 hr wedding, I think its not frugality, its stupid.

And if see the distribution of Indian and my dad's expenses, its more stupidity than frugality as a principle.

[midlet2013]

This is an interesting discussion. I consider myself frugal but not at the level of WD40. We live in a HDB, have no car, have no maid, and most of our appliances are more than 10 years old. I am averse to any type of loan except for the HDB mortgage. We basically accumulated a respectable net worth not due to savvy investing but just due to low spending compared to our income. Prior to the pandemic, we still had our overseas trips, dining out, movies and other entertainment. I do not consider myself ready for retirement and plan to work until retirement age unless the work environment deteriorates severely or unless we get kicked out of here for any reason.
I think WD40 did very well for himself. I have many countrymen in overseas employment that returned home with no savings after their contract ended. Some had savings but placed them in failed investments forcing them to go abroad again.
I understand the story of the very frugal Asian parent or grand parent as this happened to us. For Asians, many of our parents and grandparents experienced hard times and developed a frugal mentality that affected us in different ways. I believe I became more frugal compared to my generation due to my parent's and my own experiences. My siblings are more into the FOMO mentality as they value experiences more than savings but at least they do not borrow for these experiences.

I am an Indian too and my wife n I never spend more than 30-40% of our income. But luckily , we are able to earn well now. But we have seen it all. From low lifestyle to high lifestyle. And we do enjoy the transition.

Ofcoz I dont think people should overspend in a way that it is hurtful to savings and retirements, etc. But, my biggest fear is that Comfort Zone leads to Complacency.

Thus, Financial Freedom should not result in zero passion. Instead it should inspire one to do things that one could not otherwise do.

One of the reasons I like to do tech work is bcuz it gives me purpose and once I have zero financial worry, I can focus on learning.

I wanna live like a rich guy, but I wanna die like a knowledgable guy.

[Lisafuller]

Interesting perspective! Personally, I would never go so far just to save a couple of dollars, but if you and your family are happy, then what you’re doing is great! Hell, you even got some good exercise out of it!

Thanks. Yeah, most people wouldnt do it. People who are frugal are outliers. But the thing is whether you are doing this naturally or out of compulsion. Anything you do naturally and stuff that you like you will love doing it, while things that you forcing upon yourself will make you miserable.

But people think, anyone who is different from them are forcing things upon themselves and so are miserable. Hence my long post, sorry about that

Good point that you brought up. Having to be frugal out of necessity would be torture, but doing it out of choice could be a joy.

[Lisafuller]

WD40, in all of his guises, if nothing else, has been single-minded as long as we've known him here. I have to give him props as he has an end goal in mind and is doing what is necessary for him and his family to achieve that in the shortest possible time with the assets at his disposal. I wish I'd have had his determination to not wait for what may never appear and work with what one has, to get to where they want, in the shortest time & safest way possible.

I am curious, though. WD40 do you have a bucket list? I don't. My signature says it all.

If there is anything to show for myself over the years I spent here, it is my networth, I guess, when I grow older and look back, maybe I will regret, living in a place for so long, yet not really having "lived", gotten to interact with real Singaporeans, making relationships etc. It is like the time just flew away and I didnt really make much other than money.

It's great that you at least introspect about it. I know a few of our fellow countrymen who live overseas (in Singapore and elsewhere) for years and years, live in a bubble with other fellow Indians and never look back. As far as they are concerned, all they are there for is the money.

I'd rather be like you (introspective) than the guys who never do.

Interesting conversation by the way. I would like to share my own perspective and experience. I'm Indian and my wife is Malaysian Chinese. Neither of us are particularly big spenders but I wouldn't say that we are frugal. Now both of us were working till a couple of years ago when my wife decided to take a break from work. It has continued for a bit longer than anticipated - now that we have a daughter. Once she starts preschool in September, my wife will start searching for a new job.

Anyway, the point is that prior to her break with both of us earning more than a decent amount, we might have sometimes thought twice about certain expenses. Looking back and seeing how different life is with just one salary helped us put into perspective just how much we were earning earlier and how we could have been a little bit more carefree within some limits. We swore that once she starts working again, we will make sure to spend enough to enjoy our time now when we are still relatively young.

Good mentality to have. It’s important not to overspend and go crazy, but also to spend enough to make sure that we are enjoying our lives. It’s always good to have enough saved for a rainy day, but the stuff you don’t spend you can’t take with you when you die.

[smoulder]

Good mentality to have. It’s important not to overspend and go crazy, but also to spend enough to make sure that we are enjoying our lives. It’s always good to have enough saved for a rainy day, but the stuff you don’t spend you can’t take with you when you die.

Yea the thing is that it's good to go into retirement age with enough and not have to worry about money at a time when you might find it harder to work or get a well paid job. It's also nice to have enough so that you can do things like traveling when you are older.

However, on the other hand, if in the process of saving up, if you deprive yourself when you are younger and at an age when can actually enjoy yourself, you may well end up putting off enjoying the fruits of your labor till it's too late.

[smoulder]

Good mentality to have. It’s important not to overspend and go crazy, but also to spend enough to make sure that we are enjoying our lives. It’s always good to have enough saved for a rainy day, but the stuff you don’t spend you can’t take with you when you die.

Yea the thing is that it's good to go into retirement age with enough and not have to worry about money at a time when you might find it harder to work or get a well paid job. It's also nice to have enough so that you can do things like traveling when you are older.

However, on the other hand, if in the process of saving up, if you deprive yourself when you are younger and at an age when can actually enjoy yourself, you may well end up putting off enjoying the fruits of your labor till it's too late.

[Wd40]

But, my biggest fear is that Comfort Zone leads to Complacency.

Thus, Financial Freedom should not result in zero passion. Instead it should inspire one to do things that one could not otherwise do.

I wanna live like a rich guy, but I wanna die like a knowledgable guy.

I absolutely love being in comfort zone and being complacent. I guess we both are exactly opposite, like chalk and cheese, I think if we knew each other in real life, we wont even be able to stand each. You are well read high achiever. Good for you, but I dont like to lead a life like that. I am absolutely enjoying my life doing nothing. The last books I read were Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn.

One of the reasons, I set out to achieve financial independence over everything else is because the society thinks people like you are winners and rest are losers. So I wanted to make sure, I make enough money so that I can show middle finger to society and live a life exactly like how I want.

[Wd40]

This is an interesting discussion. I consider myself frugal but not at the level of WD40. We live in a HDB, have no car, have no maid, and most of our appliances are more than 10 years old. I am averse to any type of loan except for the HDB mortgage. We basically accumulated a respectable net worth not due to savvy investing but just due to low spending compared to our income. Prior to the pandemic, we still had our overseas trips, dining out, movies and other entertainment. I do not consider myself ready for retirement and plan to work until retirement age unless the work environment deteriorates severely or unless we get kicked out of here for any reason.
I think WD40 did very well for himself. I have many countrymen in overseas employment that returned home with no savings after their contract ended. Some had savings but placed them in failed investments forcing them to go abroad again.
I understand the story of the very frugal Asian parent or grand parent as this happened to us. For Asians, many of our parents and grandparents experienced hard times and developed a frugal mentality that affected us in different ways. I believe I became more frugal compared to my generation due to my parent's and my own experiences. My siblings are more into the FOMO mentality as they value experiences more than savings but at least they do not borrow for these experiences.

Thanks. I agree, there is no one way of living and your siblings are doing the right thing. It is just that, there is usually a trade off and the equation is very simple. The more you want to spend, the more you have to earn. The more you have to earn the longer you have to work. If you enjoy your work, that is great. Few people in this world are lucky to be skilled enough to find the work they enjoy and these people dont really have to do any trade off.

Others are so unlucky, they slog their whole lives yet earn meagre wages and never will be able to enjoy anything.

Then there are people like me, who dont like to work or put in any effort to learn anything. But we have been lucky somehow got into the IT boom, although we hate our job, we are kind of trying to bear with it by choosing roles where you can slack a lot and basically get to do what we like, which is doing "nothing" and in the meanwhile accumulate wealth, so that eventually when our luck runs out, we can call it quits. There is no way I would like to work in IT in my 50s.

I also like to make a point about your statement "We basically accumulated a respectable net worth not due to savvy investing but just due to low spending compared to our income": I am also same. Didnt make any windfalls from the stock market, have been mostly invested conservatively. But it is one thing to accumulate wealth, but totally different thing to make it last and survive inflation for the next 40-50 years. So, although we were lucky to be able to get a good surplus saving job. I think we should invest, in the markets in safe investments like Index funds and put our money to work.

[Wd40]

Frugalness sometime puts you in a tight spot. Our team, likes to take people for team lunch whenever someone comes from Offshore. I understand taking out of lunch, but why go to very expensive places. Someone comes once every 3 months, before pandemic and then they go out and spend like $30-40 per person. That pisses me off, because I dont want to spend that much unless I am taking my family out. I mean, think about it I tell my wife, I went out of lunch with team and spent $30-40 for myself.

Same thing when someone leaves the company. I have been with this company for 6 years now and every year people come and go and somebody made this rule that people who are leaving will get gifts and everyone contributes like $25. Last month 2 people from our team quit and I was asked to contribute $50. There are 8 people in our team and these people who are quitting are going to get $200 each. I am like what the hell? I havent gifted that much to my wife also. I just refused to contribute. So, yeah I am frugal in a very wierd way.

[smoulder]

Frugalness sometime puts you in a tight spot. Our team, likes to take people for team lunch whenever someone comes from Offshore. I understand taking out of lunch, but why go to very expensive places. Someone comes once every 3 months, before pandemic and then they go out and spend like $30-40 per person. That pisses me off, because I dont want to spend that much unless I am taking my family out. I mean, think about it I tell my wife, I went out of lunch with team and spent $30-40 for myself.

Same thing when someone leaves the company. I have been with this company for 6 years now and every year people come and go and somebody made this rule that people who are leaving will get gifts and everyone contributes like $25. Last month 2 people from our team quit and I was asked to contribute $50. There are 8 people in our team and these people who are quitting are going to get $200 each. I am like what the hell? I havent gifted that much to my wife also. I just refused to contribute. So, yeah I am frugal in a very wierd way.

I feel your pain. They shouldn't be trying to force people to contribute. Why should you if you are not that close to the person they are spending the money on? You don't have to be close to your colleagues. This is regardless of being frugal or not.

[Lisafuller]

Good mentality to have. It’s important not to overspend and go crazy, but also to spend enough to make sure that we are enjoying our lives. It’s always good to have enough saved for a rainy day, but the stuff you don’t spend you can’t take with you when you die.

Yea the thing is that it's good to go into retirement age with enough and not have to worry about money at a time when you might find it harder to work or get a well paid job. It's also nice to have enough so that you can do things like traveling when you are older.

However, on the other hand, if in the process of saving up, if you deprive yourself when you are younger and at an age when can actually enjoy yourself, you may well end up putting off enjoying the fruits of your labor till it's too late.

Right, it’s all about balance. Don’t enjoy yourself too much when you’re young because you’re end up suffering when you’re older. At the same time, don’t forget to live while you’re young or you will regret it when you’re older.

[Lisafuller]

But, my biggest fear is that Comfort Zone leads to Complacency.

Thus, Financial Freedom should not result in zero passion. Instead it should inspire one to do things that one could not otherwise do.

I wanna live like a rich guy, but I wanna die like a knowledgable guy.

I absolutely love being in comfort zone and being complacent. I guess we both are exactly opposite, like chalk and cheese, I think if we knew each other in real life, we wont even be able to stand each. You are well read high achiever. Good for you, but I dont like to lead a life like that. I am absolutely enjoying my life doing nothing. The last books I read were Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn.

One of the reasons, I set out to achieve financial independence over everything else is because the society thinks people like you are winners and rest are losers. So I wanted to make sure, I make enough money so that I can show middle finger to society and live a life exactly like how I want.

Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn! My dad read them to me when I was little. I can’t imagine living my life exactly like you describe, but I admire your discipline and your determination to live life on your own terms, regardless of what naysayers think.

[Lisafuller]

Frugalness sometime puts you in a tight spot. Our team, likes to take people for team lunch whenever someone comes from Offshore. I understand taking out of lunch, but why go to very expensive places. Someone comes once every 3 months, before pandemic and then they go out and spend like $30-40 per person. That pisses me off, because I dont want to spend that much unless I am taking my family out. I mean, think about it I tell my wife, I went out of lunch with team and spent $30-40 for myself.

Same thing when someone leaves the company. I have been with this company for 6 years now and every year people come and go and somebody made this rule that people who are leaving will get gifts and everyone contributes like $25. Last month 2 people from our team quit and I was asked to contribute $50. There are 8 people in our team and these people who are quitting are going to get $200 each. I am like what the hell? I havent gifted that much to my wife also. I just refused to contribute. So, yeah I am frugal in a very wierd way.

I understand the frustration of being hit with these exorbitant costs for dinners you’d rather not attend and paying for gifts for people whom you barely even know. But I usually contribute just because it would be awkward not to. Do you ever worry about the response you get from refusing to contribute?

[Wd40]

Frugalness sometime puts you in a tight spot. Our team, likes to take people for team lunch whenever someone comes from Offshore. I understand taking out of lunch, but why go to very expensive places. Someone comes once every 3 months, before pandemic and then they go out and spend like $30-40 per person. That pisses me off, because I dont want to spend that much unless I am taking my family out. I mean, think about it I tell my wife, I went out of lunch with team and spent $30-40 for myself.

Same thing when someone leaves the company. I have been with this company for 6 years now and every year people come and go and somebody made this rule that people who are leaving will get gifts and everyone contributes like $25. Last month 2 people from our team quit and I was asked to contribute $50. There are 8 people in our team and these people who are quitting are going to get $200 each. I am like what the hell? I havent gifted that much to my wife also. I just refused to contribute. So, yeah I am frugal in a very wierd way.

I understand the frustration of being hit with these exorbitant costs for dinners you’d rather not attend and paying for gifts for people whom you barely even know. But I usually contribute just because it would be awkward not to. Do you ever worry about the response you get from refusing to contribute?

No, I dont worry anymore. If I was new in the org, I would probably. But now, most people know me well.

[Lisafuller]

Frugalness sometime puts you in a tight spot. Our team, likes to take people for team lunch whenever someone comes from Offshore. I understand taking out of lunch, but why go to very expensive places. Someone comes once every 3 months, before pandemic and then they go out and spend like $30-40 per person. That pisses me off, because I dont want to spend that much unless I am taking my family out. I mean, think about it I tell my wife, I went out of lunch with team and spent $30-40 for myself.

Same thing when someone leaves the company. I have been with this company for 6 years now and every year people come and go and somebody made this rule that people who are leaving will get gifts and everyone contributes like $25. Last month 2 people from our team quit and I was asked to contribute $50. There are 8 people in our team and these people who are quitting are going to get $200 each. I am like what the hell? I havent gifted that much to my wife also. I just refused to contribute. So, yeah I am frugal in a very wierd way.

I understand the frustration of being hit with these exorbitant costs for dinners you’d rather not attend and paying for gifts for people whom you barely even know. But I usually contribute just because it would be awkward not to. Do you ever worry about the response you get from refusing to contribute?

No, I dont worry anymore. If I was new in the org, I would probably. But now, most people know me well.

I see, I guess it would tough to get used to at first, but after a while, everyone would accept it and move on. There are more important things to worry about, after all.