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How to tell if he's really interested and sincere

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in doubts.....

How to tell if he's really interested and sincere

Postby in doubts..... » Tue, 22 Mar 2005 4:16 pm

if ur a new couple...less than 3wks....usually romance is hot in the air ...n
u'll miss each other a lot n gonna call n sms everyday?
so for calls/sms, how often is considered normal?

if he only sms ones a day...like only after work...is it normal?
he hardly send "gdmorning sms"....and sometimes when i sms during working hours he didnt reply...reason is "im vr busy today"...
is that reason for real?
can any men out there give me a clue?? what is it trying to say here??

n he hardly call...maybe cos we meet quite often?
but i thought ppl in love usually will miss each other a lot then even when they r busy, they will either give u a call/sms during lunch time to say something sweet??

am i right to conclude that he's not really interested??

i need advise from all men here....any idea how i can figure out if he's serious with the relationship or jez looking for fun?

tell me something pls :roll:
would luv to hear ur voice :wink:
n thanks in advance :lol:

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joop
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SMS language

Postby joop » Tue, 22 Mar 2005 4:29 pm

Please try to refrain from SMS language here, it's a headache to read.
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4t3hw1n

Postby 4t3hw1n » Tue, 22 Mar 2005 5:01 pm

Is 733t-5p34k allowed here?

Silly

Stupid

Postby Silly » Tue, 22 Mar 2005 5:13 pm

4t3hw1n wrote:Is 733t-5p34k allowed here?


Trying to prove your stupidity? :roll:

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Postby singans » Tue, 22 Mar 2005 7:39 pm

Well … here are my 2 cents

1/ demonstration of affection varies from one person to an other. For example, 2 persons in a same room might not feel both comfortable: one might feel just well and an other one cold.

2/ some people are more theoretically rational (neither good or bad) and tend to live their life in a rather steady way (as opposed to high highs and low lows).

3/ one might like to have some air, have time to do his things passionately or not always feel the need to be w/ his loved one.

If it help :?

Guest

Postby Guest » Tue, 22 Mar 2005 7:43 pm

Well three weeks is hardly in love and maybe he has to work for a living so he can't look at his phone every five minutes.

Don't send him a message for a few days, he'll think you're getting bored with him and if he likes you he'll start texting you. If he doesn't he won't text you, but at least then you know.

bUBBS

Postby bUBBS » Wed, 23 Mar 2005 12:01 am

If you feel all is not well, go with your instinct.
Sorry, but one text a day doesn't seem very romantic to me. And we all know how easy it is to text, especially when you're in love.
Sorry, my two cents worth.

Bubbs

Postby Bubbs » Wed, 23 Mar 2005 12:04 am

Yes, try not texting for three days. What's that old saying....'Never explain, never complain.'......well, don't explain, but don't complain when he is being mean with his texts......

A good rule of thumb is, I find,...........if a man doesn't text or contact you for over four days.....unless he's in jail, or hospital...at the start of a relationship....well, it speaks for itself. Unless he's gameplaying....but if he really wants you he won't chance losing you. So, you decide.

really?

Postby really? » Wed, 23 Mar 2005 9:04 am

First, how old are you? It sounds like you are still a teenager. Lots of people have lots of responsibilities at work and cannot spend their time sending cute, sweet, sms messages --- truly. Honestly, it sounds like you are on the road to really driving him crazy with your neediness. Calm down, remember the things you like to do & spend some time doing those things rather than counting sms messages and phone calls. Don't give up your whole life waiting for him to call you or text you!

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Postby Singapore_Sling » Wed, 23 Mar 2005 10:12 am

If anyone sent me something like
"im vr busy today"...
, I'd probably punch their lights out because:

They don't exhibit the slightest interest in using normal words

can't spell to save their life


What the hell is it with this sms-speak. You have a full keyboard in front of you - bloody well use it!!!!

You don't deserve a boyfriend if you can't even make the effort to write full words. Harsh, but 12-year olds shouldn't have relationships.

no doubts to in-doubts

Postby no doubts to in-doubts » Wed, 23 Mar 2005 10:42 am

"in-doubts" is such a desperado. No doubts about that.
Singapore sling, you are so right. I totally agree. She sounds like a 12 year old girl (disgusting over usage of sms language and a full display of her singlish)..and a cheap needy one at that (hey lady, if you text him and he does not reply, what does that show? He is jolly well avoiding you! And I sense that you are the one that forced him into getting into this relationship with you. He obviously does not like you but feel obligated and pity for you.

in-doubts

Postby in-doubts » Wed, 23 Mar 2005 3:25 pm

singans wrote:Well … here are my 2 cents

2/ some people are more theoretically rational (neither good or bad) and tend to live their life in a rather steady way (as opposed to high highs and low lows).

If it help :?


hi folks....
firstly....i apologize for using the sms language...really sorry :oops:
and thanks for taking the time to reply my post....really appreciate that....

"singans'...i think what you said in point 2 does make sense.....he could be such person....the thing is that...how big is the chances....
i wouldn't mind if he's this type of person.....really....

to "buBBs" i think you've spoken my mind...1 sms a day doesn't sound that romantic for new couple :)
but if there are valid reasons behind this...like if he's someone who's like what "singans" described in point 2....then its fine.....i'm ok with that.....
i'm just thinking could it be for some other reason, like he's not really into me or the relationship?....that's what i'm trying to figure out....

he does sms me ones a while....and he sometimes will call me ones he knocked off from office or when he finish his night class....
so the point here is not that he didn't contact me at all...he did, but not as much as what new couple does??
also, he doesn't really reply my sms when he's out with his friends....
so what i think is that....seems like he doesn't really miss me or maybe he only thought of me when he's bored and alone???
this is the negative thinking that i have....

I totally agree with you who said that one does not have that much of time to spare for sweet msg or calls...that they have to earn a living and that they are really busy with their work.....
this is what i'm trying to find out.....cos...if this is really the reason...than i have no complain at all.....in fact...that would be his plus side for being able to stay focus :)

to "really?" for your information...i'm not driving him crazy....don't worry he's fine :)
this are just the thoughts in my mind.....i didn't confront him or make any final judgement yet....i guess it is right to give him the benefit of the doubts......
this is the reason i'm here...to find out what others think about the matter...I'm trying to figure out someone new :)
and you know what....i'm living my life fully....i don't stick to him everyday and wait for his phone calls or sms......i go out with my friends and have fun.....
we have our own space....i'm not the sticky type.....i agree that couple's should have their own space....

so for an update.....i haven't text or call him since yesterday....got a short call from him when he finish his class last night (i was outside with friends) ...and got an sms from him late at night checking if i'm home but i haven't replied...
I'm trying to do as what "buBBS" and "guest" suggest....not to take initiative to text or call...and not to complain :)
maybe we can see if he feels that something is missing, than maybe he will take more initiative....
or,
maybe he won't feel anything at all :)
i understand some guys are quite ignorance hehe...

anyway......i'm just hoping that the lack of calls/sms is not because of the lack of interest.....but for some good reason like busy with works or whatever...

so...i'm still open to the views from you all...the good and bad....
n thanks so much for replying :lol:

and by the way, i'm not a teenage :wink:

cheers..
"in-doubts"

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Postby Singapore_Sling » Wed, 23 Mar 2005 3:44 pm

Hmm, well done with the usage of normal sentences - have to work on your English, though, 'In-doubt'.

Two things -
* he is not interested
* he is busy and it is annoying to feel like you have to send an sms per minute. You do seem to expect that and it turns mature guys off. He does work, so cut him some slack.

Two weeks? Try not seeing one another for a while and see how it feels then.

r0xx0r

Postby r0xx0r » Wed, 23 Mar 2005 4:59 pm

omg! you're on an internet forum and you chide people for chatting in net language? well, mr. grammatical, news is this ain't your grammar school, so take your lessons somewhere else.

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Postby Strong Eagle » Wed, 23 Mar 2005 5:07 pm

r0xx0r wrote:omg! you're on an internet forum and you chide people for chatting in net language? well, mr. grammatical, news is this ain't your grammar school, so take your lessons somewhere else.


Hey... I'm in agreement with Mr. Grammar. It's not 'net language', it is a crummy short hand used to type stuff into handphones that have crummy keyboards.

When on the net, it is courteous to speak/write in English (if that's the native tongue of the board). It also makes you much more understandable. And, I'll admit... I'm biased... when someone posts questions about careers in sms'ese, I really wonder how clueless that person is... does he/she think that sms goes over in the work place?


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