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Boys do those girls/women look at others like that...

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saidattul

Boys do those girls/women look at others like that...

Postby saidattul » Tue, 15 Mar 2005 1:15 am

Hi all
I notice that other girls/women look at me sometimes when I go out and the reason could be cos they may like what I wear and look like or they may simply think I'm someone they might know. It can be a little unnerving but most often I just don't think so much of it at the time. But I also notice that some girls/women react in such an affected way, like suddenly burst out laughing or laughing in a somewhat forced manner. Are they actually trying to make me feel belittled by the way I look? I bet I'm not the only person who gets these reactions, looks and affected laughs. 8) Not always but does happen once in a while :P
Once, I wore a short almost see-through dress and boots which I got from US and believe aren't sold here in Singapore. Sounds cool huh? It's nothing too slutty or too in-your-face as 'see-through' might sound and my boyfriend and my friends and cousin and her friends liked it so I believe I didn't look... well, laughable.There was this bunch of girls suddenly laughing out loud and making unkind comments in Mandarin behind me thinking I couldn't understand. Or when I wore this lovely tube dress with my huge shades... same type of reaction, or a long skirt worn as tube dress with big boho belt and what I call my Jesus sandles, nothing outlandish no? 8) there's a pair of girls walking towards me, staring, and then when I'm near enough, they burst out laughing, and said something like "...step kurus". And by the way, what does the term 'step' mean? I know 'kurus' mean slim, thin or skinny in Malay and I know the young Malays like to use this term. Maybe these people have their own idea of looking good and if they see you in something different they will try to make you feel uncomfortable with your choice of dressing. Perhaps, that's why some people here have a rather 'safe' follower sense of dressing. I know, there are also people who just can't be bothered. :P
Well, well... au contraire, I've worn a black shirt with jeans and accessorized with a scarf around my neck and wore aviators and my fave peep-toe heels - sounds more 'safe' now, no? I still got a bunch of young Malay guys commenting something and my boyfriend told me later at home that he noticed how some people actually looked at me. And that actually wasn't the first time but he just didn't tell me too often lest my ego gets too supersized. 8) Well, I like it when others admire the way I look especially when I feel great about myself, who wouldn't? And no, my style is neither shocking nor hilarious and I'm just skinny, no big boobs, big tush or big hair whatsoever. But laughing to belittle me? Well, I'm not offended or bothered by it, in fact, I'm rather amused that I could actually get such reactions from some people, particularly the females.

But of course it's competition even in this department. I guess if one sees another who's better, one may want to do whatever just to get the other down, even by that little moment of passing disparaging remarks or hammed-up gigglings and cacklings audible enough to the self-esteem. :P When I see another person looking real fabulous sometimes I'll look and smile and sometimes raise my eyebrows a little at him/her, you know, like hey hey, take a look at you... if he/she actually notices me admiring them. Yeah, I've had my fair share of complements too. That's just really nice...
And has it ever occured to me that I could have actually appeared ridiculous or somewhat contrived myself? Hmm... I'm yet to have someone honest enough to come up to me and tell me that. Well, even if people don't like others' appearances for whatever reasons they should still be polite enough to just not say or mean or force anything just to try to hurt others' feelings - courtesy lah.
I just want to share these observations of mine and maybe have some people talk about similar incidents cos you may have experienced or seen this yourselves, right grrrls? And I believe we'd like to hear some stories from you boys too. 8)

guest 987

it's because...

Postby guest 987 » Tue, 15 Mar 2005 5:46 pm

they're not very sophisticated. Even though many do travel, it's not usually the younger ones. This group is very, very unsophisticated. If you are from some other group though, older, or whatever, then you can get away with wearing anything, even pajamas, or those weird native costumes like burquas, or samfus, etc.

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eh+lah
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Postby eh+lah » Fri, 18 Mar 2005 12:56 pm

kuru = cool, japanese slang

wear something only if you feel secure enough to pull it off.

enough with the insecurities already.

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merlin69
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Fashion

Postby merlin69 » Fri, 18 Mar 2005 4:41 pm

True style is looking and feeling out of place no matter where you are.

When they laugh at you, its because they don't get it. I think it is really good of you not to laugh at them. People say and do cruel things when they do not understand, when they are presented with something different, and when they feel threatened. Dress to respect cultural sensitivities but don't pander to the insular.

saidattul

Postby saidattul » Sat, 19 Mar 2005 12:43 am

eh+lah darling, I wear whatever I like. 8) And if you think what I wrote suggest i'm having insecurities, well you've just grossly misunderstood that I don't feel secure enough to pull it off. I do feel secure to pull it off. Whatever I wear. Leggings, pedal pushers, tunics, kaftans, espadrilles, heels, fringe boots, plain old shirt and shorts, skirt worn as tube dress, crochet dress, smocked dress, tube dress, short see-through dress, etc. oh i just love clothes...
As a matter of fact, it could be these other people who feel insecure or like Merlin69 put it, "threatened". And I am amused as to these reactions I sometimes get. But never insecure about it. Feels a bit like a challenge to the norm of dressing here, or 'pander to the insular' as Merlin69 put it. But I don't mean to challenge people to belittle me by their affected laughter or whatever. But too bad, such reactions happen. What to do?
I just want to dress my own style. I don't like the sheep-dressing syndrome. I trust my own style not to appear too outrageous nor disrespectful to the cultural sensitivities in my creativity. It's just simple clothings worn with my own individuality. Know what I mean, eh+lah? 8)
And I didn't ask what's kuru, but I asked what the term 'step' mean. But thanks anyways.
"True style is looking and feeling out of place no matter where you are. "
I really like that Merlin69.

Fashion fades, style is eternal. - Ralph Lauren

Guest

Postby Guest » Sat, 19 Mar 2005 10:27 pm

They are most probably laughing at you because you look as if you try too hard. It's always easy to spot these women. If you really WERE stylish you wouldn't have to write to people on here to get justification of it.

Big aviator shades, please, so passe.
See through dresses, please, too much 'How much do you charge?'
All the chat about YOU YOU YOU. So anally retentive.
You most probably walk into a place and think everyone should fall down and worship the fashion plate you think you are when in reality you sound as if you look a real fright.

Try going out in some good jeans and a white shirt and wedge heeled sandals, accessorised by a statement handbag and some tasteful ethnic jewellry. And no attitude.

Beautiful fashionable people don't have to try nearly as hard as you do.

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eh+lah
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Postby eh+lah » Sat, 19 Mar 2005 11:02 pm

like i said before this post was just begging a reply like that. oh well. enough already.

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seraphim
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Postby seraphim » Sun, 20 Mar 2005 4:55 pm

Anonymous wrote:They are most probably laughing at you because you look as if you try too hard. It's always easy to spot these women. If you really WERE stylish you wouldn't have to write to people on here to get justification of it.

Big aviator shades, please, so passe.
See through dresses, please, too much 'How much do you charge?'
All the chat about YOU YOU YOU. So anally retentive.
You most probably walk into a place and think everyone should fall down and worship the fashion plate you think you are when in reality you sound as if you look a real fright.

Try going out in some good jeans and a white shirt and wedge heeled sandals, accessorised by a statement handbag and some tasteful ethnic jewellry. And no attitude.

Beautiful fashionable people don't have to try nearly as hard as you do.


Way to go! 8) (I'm playing heckler)

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eh+lah
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Postby eh+lah » Sun, 20 Mar 2005 6:29 pm

arriba arriba ándale ándale *cracks whip* haha

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Postby guest as well » Mon, 21 Mar 2005 1:18 pm

Anonymous wrote:They are most probably laughing at you because you look as if you try too hard. It's always easy to spot these women. If you really WERE stylish you wouldn't have to write to people on here to get justification of it.

Beautiful fashionable people don't have to try nearly as hard as you do.


Have to agree with the above statements. People who are truly unique don't have to work at it and they certainly don't look for (or even notice) the reactions of others.

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madwolfie
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Postby madwolfie » Mon, 21 Mar 2005 1:32 pm

Yeap! *sticks her two paws up* Agreed. :D

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kiss_snowhite
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Postby kiss_snowhite » Mon, 21 Mar 2005 2:50 pm

Anonymous wrote:Try going out in some good jeans and a white shirt and wedge heeled sandals, accessorised by a statement handbag and some tasteful ethnic jewellry. And no attitude.

Beautiful fashionable people don't have to try nearly as hard as you do.


Well said. I agree. :wink:
kisses..muacks!!


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