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by Mariopeterson100 » Sun, 22 Jul 2018 3:25 pm
I feel your struggles. I too am American and have a Korean girlfriend and it would be an understatement to say we receive negative attention. In the shopping centres, at the gym, at restaurants, coffee shops, in the MRT, you name it. But don't worry; I can explain why this happens.
I met my girlfriend when I was in the Air Force stationed in South Korea and would soon learn interracial couples in environments with strict cultural boundaries were met with distaste. It took me awhile to comprehend this because my mind was still accustomed to the American atmosphere where most couples weren't examined closely in public if the two were racially different. As in every culture, older generations (especially far-east Asian) tend to expect individuals from their respective culture to date in their own race. They can't bare the thought of seeing kids with mixed genes because it will distort the family bloodline. (Another minuscule reason may be assumptions that people desire to marry their way out of their country.) At least in my experience, it is widely evident that family in Asia is held to a much higher regard than in the West. It can be perceived as insulting to the culture, but I truly believe that the mindset is becoming more accepting towards interracial dating these days.
A bigger proportion of the nasty looks were toward my Korean girlfriend, and this is because young women are a much easier target for elderly individuals from cultures where women are viewed as inferior in many regards. Elders in Asia are very respected and treated gracefully but unfortunately, some manipulate this kind of power and use it in a disrespectful and forceful way. Singapore is no exception. Although my girlfriend is Korean, she is often confused with Singaporean Chinese and receives this kind of cold treatment with me in Singapore as well.
My advice is to approach this with an open-mind and show that you can be a good person with your wife regardless of the opinion towards you two. Don't accommodate to them but at the same time show why you can be a great fit and be a likable person. I know you're not doing this, but it would be illogical to blame a great culture where strictness has made up a fundamental portion of its identity for numerous generations. We love Singapore and enjoy hanging out with locals and expats alike. Good luck!