airplane seating etiquette

[PNGMK]

I'm short and I usually have the aisle seat. On all but one airline I use I know how to find the "secret" button that lets the aisle arm rest swing up. I can left that arm rest and easily swing my legs to the side to allow him/her to pass by. Personally I'd rather not have some one's behind in my face but just swinging to the side usually gives them enough space.

[the.pr.holder]

I've never once seen this, and I've been in USA, Australia, UK, etc, but rarely to asian countries. so, does that mean the westerners are not civilized?
I still think that being gentleman has nothing to do with this. I never once asked anyone to "clear a path" for me, and I'm not that young anymore, so if I wanted, I could've invoked certain "privileges".
it's not good for anyone (regardless of gender) to be spoiled like that. "Dont ask for help if you dont need one, and do ask for help if you do need one", that's always been my principle in life since I was a little girl, that's how I was brought up and that's what I taught both my daughters. I'd hate for them to become "ask-holes" like in this youtube video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NC4ipBUCVV8

[x9200]

I think there are actually like two issues and they do not converge in this topic.
The first is, "I'm a girl, so I can't go out like that" - this is IMHO, an AH response, so I agree.
At the same time, most of people responding in this thread still feel it is more appropriate to let someone to leave the seat without rubbing him or her. Personally, the disrespect to someone personal space (and this in Singapore includes much more than the butt-nose rubbing in the airplanes) is not any better to what is shown in the video you pointed to.

[ecureilx]

The gentlemen should have acted like gentlemen and gotten up off their butts immediately, without prompting.

Except, if you read the post above you, you would have noticed that OP is a gentle Lady !

[ecureilx]

Personally I'd rather not have some one's behind in my face but just swinging to the side usually gives them enough space.

I don't want anybody's behind or front in my face ! Hence I'd rather get up and let them pass ...

Especially since the newer sliding economy class seats have effectively reduced space between seats.

[earthfriendly]

The gentlemen should have acted like gentlemen and gotten up off their butts immediately, without prompting.

I too, am perplexed on the "right" etiquete. Whenever I stood up and let the Americans (whites and I am not sure if I should extrapolate to other races/ cutlures) passed, it was well-received and appreciated. Prompting me to continue this practise. Reason I brought the culture / race of white, say as opposed to Asians, is because of personal space issue. In most Asian countries, personal space are less coveted, hence people weave in and out around you in a human traffic situation, just to pass. It kindof expedite the process, without constantly having to wait on the other party to move out of the way.

Or is it considered polite to do so, as pointed out above?

Or could it just be my imagination. Maybe these passengers don't really care even if they end up rubbing me a little. I mean, come on , we are all humans. Accidentally touching another human, especially in confine space, shouldn't be that taboo-ish. Right? Anyway, just my two cents.

What if you need to pass a sleeping passenger?

I am petite.

Actually, that guy is lucky that all he needs to do is stand up and give way. Wait till he sits next to a passenger who likes to sleep resting his / her head onto the next person's shoulder. Happened to me while riding a bus in SG.

[x9200]

What if you need to pass a sleeping passenger?

You wake her/him up*. Assuming you REALLY need to leave your seat. It seems a better solution than wet your seat or worse.

*)Regardless how petite you are you will likely wake this person up anyway.

[BBCWatcher]

Except, if you read the post above you, you would have noticed that OP is a gentle Lady !

I did, but the original poster's gender is not relevant to my comment. You didn't read carefully enough, it seems. The original poster observed the (mis)behavior of "guys." She did not describe her own behavior.

[BBCWatcher]

I've never once seen this, and I've been in USA, Australia, UK, etc, but rarely to asian countries. so, does that mean the westerners are not civilized?

On those specific occasions, yes.

Note that, within a circle of family and friends seated together (as family and friends often are), any mutually agreed (mis)behavior is up to them.

For other rude behaviors, Instagram is useful.

[the.pr.holder]

Except, if you read the post above you, you would have noticed that OP is a gentle Lady !

sorry, what do you mean by this?

back to topic.
I'm an asian, and I dont take lightly that youngster telling someone around 20 years older than her to stand up. it's just not right. I'm always satisfied if the people besides me just adjusted their seating position so I can jut walk through them, never have I even dreamed of telling them to get up, even if they're much younger than me. if that girl tells my husband to stand up, I'd slap her in the face. we're decades older than you and you dare to tell us to get up? that's very unbecoming.
none of the female passengers I encountered during 30+ years of flying have done this before, both young and old, but then again, most of them are caucasians. everybody just walk through the other passengers. but then again, "being gentleman" is a western thing, nothing to do with eastern culture, and yet, it's not being practiced in the west anymore.
as for the youtube video, it has nothing to do with passengers. what I'm trying to say is that if you pamper someone just because she's a girl, she'll become spoiled and it will show everywhere, including in the workplace, like the ask-hole. "I'm a girl, so you need to give me special treatment, including doing my job for me", etc..

[x9200]

Ultimately It's just your subjective opinion and I strongly doubt your observation about such behavior (not leaving the seat to let people out) are any representative. My experience is exactly opposite. People do it very frequently. In fact your earlier statement of it being an Asian thing, is actually counter-logical if you take into account that the most Westerners are Caucasians, bigger and fatter in general than their Asian counterparts. Are we talking about the economy class?

[the.pr.holder]

yes, economy class.
as I said, the exception is for tall people, then you have to get up, because no matter how you adjust your seating position, your knees will always touch the seat in front of you. but not all caucasian are that tall. I think you have to be 180cm+ to be in this category.
what I meant was, all the caucasian ladies I observed just walked through the other passengers, never once I saw them asking them to get up. that's why I feel weird, the people who live in the country where this culture originates dont follow this anymore, they jsut walk through the passengers, unless again if the passengers are tall, so why are asians so want to be westernized?

[BBCWatcher]

The female passenger could have been a little more polite, e.g. "Would you mind getting up to let me out?" However, I don't think many people are going to agree with you otherwise. Nobody should have to jump, leap, stumble, and/or wiggle over/around another airline passenger just to get to the aisle. There's even some risk of injury in trying to do that. It's just common sense courtesy: get up, and let the other passenger in/out. (For health reasons you should be stretching your legs anyway. Consider it a favor.)

Here's a travel forum discussion about the same situation. There's overwhelming consensus: passengers should get up to let others in/out. Even in business and first classes if you're in some way blocking access.

You've never seen somebody get up to let other passengers in/out of their middle or window seats? Even during boarding, when everybody is getting into their seats? I find that very hard to believe if you've flown economy class with any frequency and with a reasonable mix of nationalities aboard.

There have been a couple occasions when, shall we say, "novice" passengers have attempted to pole vault over me to their seats while I'm sitting in an aisle seat. I politely ask them to wait just a moment, then I stand up and give them complete freedom of movement into their seats. It's the only reasonable thing to do in the circumstances, gladly so.

Perhaps you can take a video of this tight maneuvering you're suggesting so we can evaluate whether it's comfortable and safe for all parties in the circumstances?

[the.pr.holder]

in that link you gave us, it's quite clear that the aisle passenger is kinda tall, and the OP clearly mentioned that he/she clearly want to get out without the aisle passenger needing to get up, unlike in this case, "you must get up". the mentality is very different. OP actually FEELS bad that the aisle passenger had to always get up in order for OP to go to toilet.
videotaping the passengers? I think that would offend them, but I'll try if possible. btw, in this incident, their knees are perfectly "attached" to their seats, so it's like there's nothing there. plenty of space for even my husband's legs, let alone mine, and let alone that skinny girl's legs.
in asian culture, privilege is given not based on gender, but on age. so, you dont tell anyone several decades older than you to get up when you can easily just walk through them

[BBCWatcher]

No, there's no tallness or size at issue here. In economy class, it's common courtesy (even decency) to get up and let the middle and/or window seat passengers in or out. There's no serious debate about this situation, at least among those who understand basic human decency.

There is never "plenty of space" in economy class. That's just ridiculous.