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Online dating vs serious relationship?

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jupitermars
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Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by jupitermars » Mon, 04 Apr 2016 1:36 pm

How many of you tried using online dating apps looking for a relationship but end up meeting casual daters and getting all sick and tired? There are so many options these days at our fingertips (with all the online dating apps), and finding someone or rather "The next one" seems to be easier. Maybe those who are successful in online dating can share their experience here?

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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by Ammy » Tue, 12 Apr 2016 6:54 pm

Hi! I don't have a success story but an experience worth sharing. I have been using dating apps for a long time now and found that people usually look for something else and say "online dating don't work". I think the main point here is to be clear with yourself when you start seeking someone online- Looking for something casual or a serious relationship?
For serious dating, I mean finding a soulmate or something, you need to find apps that have serious users.
I have been using [sanitised] personally and that's by far the most decent app around where you can find more like-minded people. And recently I started using Flaime which focus on intellectual conversation rather than profile pictures browsing. I found them to be something different. Maybe you can try it and also share if it works for you.

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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by PNGMK » Tue, 12 Apr 2016 8:41 pm

I tried it briefly between marriages. It increases your pool of potential mates and speeds up the process but you need to develop some hard habits and rules to get serious. Just some from the top of my head...

1. If they won't pass a phone number or meeting in person after indicating some interest and a bit of chatting move on.
2. If you find someone you like - turn off or delete your profiles while you work on the relationship. Don't go back online into the field - that's not fair to you in the relationship or her.
3. Stick to casual meets at first - coffee shops; book shops (the old borders was good). Keep it light - it makes it easier to open up.
4. Post a real picture and post your real stat's. Even if your'e a bald fat short ass like me with a giant sock someone will want you.
5. Don't discard the unlikely match ups. Sometimes people are too selective for their own good.
6. Oh - final one - geography... what's the point of matching with someone on another continent FFS?

(PS - if your looking for a pluck and chuck then stick to Tinder).
I not lawyer/teacher/CPA.
You've been arrested? Law Society of Singapore can provide referrals.
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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by the lynx » Wed, 13 Apr 2016 11:50 am

Parking myself here so that I can visit this thread when I'm bored.

jupitermars
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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by jupitermars » Tue, 19 Apr 2016 3:05 pm

PNGMK wrote:I tried it briefly between marriages. It increases your pool of potential mates and speeds up the process but you need to develop some hard habits and rules to get serious. Just some from the top of my head...

1. If they won't pass a phone number or meeting in person after indicating some interest and a bit of chatting move on.
2. If you find someone you like - turn off or delete your profiles while you work on the relationship. Don't go back online into the field - that's not fair to you in the relationship or her.
3. Stick to casual meets at first - coffee shops; book shops (the old borders was good). Keep it light - it makes it easier to open up.
4. Post a real picture and post your real stat's. Even if your'e a bald fat short ass like me with a giant sock someone will want you.
5. Don't discard the unlikely match ups. Sometimes people are too selective for their own good.
6. Oh - final one - geography... what's the point of matching with someone on another continent FFS?

(PS - if your looking for a pluck and chuck then stick to Tinder).
Are you currently dating someone serious from online dating apps? O:)

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PNGMK
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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by PNGMK » Tue, 19 Apr 2016 4:15 pm

No, I married a childhood friend I met at primary school.
I not lawyer/teacher/CPA.
You've been arrested? Law Society of Singapore can provide referrals.
You want an International School job? School website or http://www.ISS.edu
Your rugrat needs a School? Avoid for profit schools
You need Tax advice? Ask a CPA
You ran away without doing NS? Shame on you!

christinalwq
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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by christinalwq » Sun, 20 Nov 2016 10:15 pm

I've been trying online dating for a while. Either the people I encountered are crap from the start or they seemed "good" until I get caught with surprises. After so many disheartening encounters, I become paranoid and start to do background checks on them (avoid wasting my time further). Just wondering if you guys actually do such searches on potential dates?

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PNGMK
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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by PNGMK » Mon, 21 Nov 2016 9:10 am

I agree that's there are some fakes out there but how do you do a background check?
I not lawyer/teacher/CPA.
You've been arrested? Law Society of Singapore can provide referrals.
You want an International School job? School website or http://www.ISS.edu
Your rugrat needs a School? Avoid for profit schools
You need Tax advice? Ask a CPA
You ran away without doing NS? Shame on you!

christinalwq
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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by christinalwq » Mon, 21 Nov 2016 9:40 am

PNGMK wrote:I agree that's there are some fakes out there but how do you do a background check?
I suppose you can do your own basic search, but I'm also aware some agencies who provide such services. Apparently, this service is pretty common in UK already. All you need to do is pay a fee (affordable) and get a pretty comprehensive report on your potential date/spouse. May be a little unconventional, but I think it saves me a lot of trouble and time.

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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by Addadude » Mon, 21 Nov 2016 1:18 pm

Why do I sense that a suggested website will be mentioned in christinalwq's next post?
"Both politicians and nappies need to be changed regularly, and for the same reasons."

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sundaymorningstaple
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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by sundaymorningstaple » Mon, 21 Nov 2016 1:34 pm

You waiting for it too, eh? ;-)

christinalwq
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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by christinalwq » Mon, 21 Nov 2016 2:15 pm

Addadude wrote:Why do I sense that a suggested website will be mentioned in christinalwq's next post?
Why do I sense that you sense wrongly?

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sundaymorningstaple
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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by sundaymorningstaple » Mon, 21 Nov 2016 2:59 pm

Probably because most of us have been here for quite a while and have seen just about everything and let's just say, after a while, we get skeptical when someone joins with a leading post or two that opens it up to an solicitation or advertisement. The vast majority of the times it does just that. But as I still had a shadow of doubt of your intentions, despite how your post looked and read, you are able to still post. ;-)

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christinalwq
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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by christinalwq » Mon, 21 Nov 2016 3:03 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:Probably because most of us have been here for quite a while and have seen just about everything and let's just say, after a while, we get skeptical when someone joins with a leading post or two that opens it up to an solicitation or advertisement. The vast majority of the times it does just that. But as I still had a shadow of doubt of your intentions, despite how your post looked and read, you are able to still post. ;-)

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Why would there be an advertisement? I'm sorry, but isn't this not allowed to begin with? It's written very clearly before you click "i accept".

Has it truly occurred to you that it's a bias view on your end? You come making assumptions based on your "experiences" and speak like you know very well. Granted that your words are true, but not for this case. So please be nice. Thanks

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sundaymorningstaple
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Re: Online dating vs serious relationship?

Post by sundaymorningstaple » Mon, 21 Nov 2016 4:26 pm

I am/was being nice. You are still able to post. :-) Normally, if we are sure we just lock the person out. ;-)

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