SINGAPORE EXPATS FORUM
Singapore Expat Forum and Message Board for Expats in Singapore & Expatriates Relocating to Singapore
A Democrat congressman vrs a little girl
- sundaymorningstaple
- Moderator
- Posts: 39766
- Joined: Thu, 11 Nov 2004 1:26 pm
- Location: Retired on the Little Red Dot
A Democrat congressman vrs a little girl
A Democratic congressman was seated in first class next to a little girl on an airplane. He turned to her and said, "Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger."
The little girl, who had just started to read her book, replied to the total stranger, "What would you want to talk about?"
"Oh, I don't know," said the congressman. "How about global warming, universal health care or stimulus packages?" as he smiled smugly.
"OK," she said. "Those could be interesting topics but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?"
The legislator, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, "Hmmm, I have no idea."
To which the little girl replies, "Do you really feel qualified to discuss global warming, universal health care or the economy when you don't know crap?"
Then she went back to reading her book.
The little girl, who had just started to read her book, replied to the total stranger, "What would you want to talk about?"
"Oh, I don't know," said the congressman. "How about global warming, universal health care or stimulus packages?" as he smiled smugly.
"OK," she said. "Those could be interesting topics but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?"
The legislator, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, "Hmmm, I have no idea."
To which the little girl replies, "Do you really feel qualified to discuss global warming, universal health care or the economy when you don't know crap?"
Then she went back to reading her book.
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers
- sundaymorningstaple
- Moderator
- Posts: 39766
- Joined: Thu, 11 Nov 2004 1:26 pm
- Location: Retired on the Little Red Dot
In 2012, more money was spent on boob jobs and Viagra than Alzheimers research.
In 40 years time we'll all be walking around with perky boobs, stiff willies and we'll have no freakin' clue why!
In 40 years time we'll all be walking around with perky boobs, stiff willies and we'll have no freakin' clue why!
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers
- sundaymorningstaple
- Moderator
- Posts: 39766
- Joined: Thu, 11 Nov 2004 1:26 pm
- Location: Retired on the Little Red Dot
Wifi
A man received a message from his new neighbour from India:
"Sorry sir, I have been using your wife day and night when you are not present at home -- maybe using more than you are using. Now I feel very much guilt. Hope you will accept my sincere apologies."
The man shot his wife...
A few minutes later he received another message:
"Sorry sir, spelling mistake....
wifi not wife.
"Sorry sir, I have been using your wife day and night when you are not present at home -- maybe using more than you are using. Now I feel very much guilt. Hope you will accept my sincere apologies."
The man shot his wife...
A few minutes later he received another message:
"Sorry sir, spelling mistake....
wifi not wife.
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers
- sundaymorningstaple
- Moderator
- Posts: 39766
- Joined: Thu, 11 Nov 2004 1:26 pm
- Location: Retired on the Little Red Dot
- sundaymorningstaple
- Moderator
- Posts: 39766
- Joined: Thu, 11 Nov 2004 1:26 pm
- Location: Retired on the Little Red Dot
- the lynx
- Governor
- Posts: 5281
- Joined: Thu, 09 Dec 2010 6:29 pm
- Location: Location: Location: Location: Location: Location: Location: Location: Location: Location: Location:
I thought it was supposed to go like this:ecureilx wrote:Lolsundaymorningstaple wrote:....and who are you?
reminds me of a lousy Joke
A guy walked into a bar and the bar tender said "we don't serve Time Travellers"
The guy said "Can I have a beer ? I am a time traveler .. "
The bar tender said, "We don't serve time travellers."
A time traveller walked into a bar.
- rajagainstthemachine
- Manager
- Posts: 2856
- Joined: Sat, 24 Nov 2012 10:45 am
- Location: Singapore
- sundaymorningstaple
- Moderator
- Posts: 39766
- Joined: Thu, 11 Nov 2004 1:26 pm
- Location: Retired on the Little Red Dot
Re: A Democrat congressman vrs a little girl
Mike and his pregnant wife live on a farm in a rural area in the west of England. No running water, no electricity, etc. One night, Mikes' wife is begins to deliver the baby. The local doctor is there in attendance. "What d'ya want me to do, Doctor?" "Hold the lantern, Mike. Here it comes!" the doctor delivers the child and holds it up for the proud father to see.
"Mike, you're the proud father of a fine strapping boy." "Saints be praised, I..." Before Mike can finish the Doctor interrupts, "Wait a minute. Hold the lantern, Mike." Soon the doctor delivers the next child. "You've a full set now, Mike. A beautiful baby daughter."
"Thanks be to..."
Again the Doctor cuts in, "Hold the lantern, Mike, Hold the lantern!" Soon the Doctor delivers a third child. The doctor
holds up the baby for Mike's inspection.
"Doctor," asks Mike, "Do you think it's the light that's attracting them?"
"Mike, you're the proud father of a fine strapping boy." "Saints be praised, I..." Before Mike can finish the Doctor interrupts, "Wait a minute. Hold the lantern, Mike." Soon the doctor delivers the next child. "You've a full set now, Mike. A beautiful baby daughter."
"Thanks be to..."
Again the Doctor cuts in, "Hold the lantern, Mike, Hold the lantern!" Soon the Doctor delivers a third child. The doctor
holds up the baby for Mike's inspection.
"Doctor," asks Mike, "Do you think it's the light that's attracting them?"
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers
-
- Similar Topics
- Replies
- Views
- Last post
-
-
A little question about Political Science Jobs
by alierainy123 » Mon, 19 Mar 2018 9:46 am » in Careers & Jobs in Singapore - 4 Replies
- 2223 Views
-
Last post by PNGMK
Mon, 19 Mar 2018 8:17 pm
-
-
-
a little question about rights
by morvarid » Sat, 07 Jul 2018 3:45 pm » in Careers & Jobs in Singapore - 1 Replies
- 1424 Views
-
Last post by PNGMK
Sat, 07 Jul 2018 9:34 pm
-
-
-
Best iphone to buy for my little brother?
by LOBSTER07 » Sun, 17 Feb 2019 10:53 pm » in Computer, Internet, Phone & Electronics - 4 Replies
- 2370 Views
-
Last post by LOBSTER07
Mon, 18 Feb 2019 10:34 am
-
-
-
Helpers taking little babies and toddlers out to play
by abbby » Tue, 14 Apr 2020 11:23 am » in General Discussions - 1 Replies
- 1361 Views
-
Last post by bgd
Tue, 14 Apr 2020 12:15 pm
-
-
-
Property transactions dropped so little?
by abbby » Thu, 14 May 2020 10:07 pm » in Property Talk, Housing & Rental - 2 Replies
- 1355 Views
-
Last post by tt1973
Fri, 15 May 2020 8:53 pm
-
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 7 guests