HELP! Mom of 2 yr old moving in the fall

[Usmom]

Any advice, suggestions....
I am a stay at home mom with a 2 yr old. Husband's job is relocating us to Singapore for a year. We need to sell our house or rent it out. I would like to put son in preschool and find nice place to live. Please any advice to make our time there as pleasant as possible. Thank you in advance.

[BedokAmerican]

If you're only relocating for one year, it might be best to rent out your house and/or hire a management company to deal with tenants and cut the grass and do maintenance.

Where in Singapore will your husband be working? The area he's working in might be a good place to start when looking for a residence or preschool. People will be better able to advise if you can give an approximate location.

[CaptainBullus]

As BedokAmerican says, you will receive a lot of advice and help here if you can be as specific as possible on what you are looking for. e.g where will your husband be working and roughly how much you can afford to pay for rent as these are the main factors (along with proximity to school/MRT) people use when deciding where to live.

[Usmom]

yes you guys are right about specifics, husband will be working in the heart of pioneer area at Jalan Ahmad Ibrahim and Gul way. I guess we will see what the allowance is. There will be no help for preschool as child is only a few years old. Is it easy to hire help and what are the average costs for part time help to clean and take care of child? What do you guys think of the pioneer area? for eating and shopping and convenience? are there a lot of families living in the area?

[beppi]

Part-time household help is difficult to find and expensive at S$15-20/hour.
Many families therefore have full-time, live-in maids (a.k.a. personal slaves), which cost around S$1000/month all included.

[BedokAmerican]

I'm going to get lambasted/reamed/yelled at for saying this, but here goes:

If you only have one child and the child is in preschool and if you're not going to be working, you really don't need a live-in maid. There, I said it.

As beppi said, it'll cost at least $1,000 per month for a maid after all excess expenses and fees are included, although the maid might only get about $500 of that. If you want a babysitter for occasional nights out, it might cost about $15 per hour. If you go out with your husband once a week for 4 hours at a time, that would be $240 per month ($120 if you go out every other week). Once a week cleaning costs about $60 per week. Yes, you get the most "bang for your buck" with a live-in maid, but it's still technically cheaper to hire a sitter and cleaner on a regular basis.

Most people will disagree with me on this one, but it's just my opinion.

I know many people will be quick to tell you they can't live without their maid, but I didn't want to have to train a maid and have to take her to the doctor every few months for pregnancy tests, keep track of cash in my wallet, pay for flights several times a year to/from her home country because of constant family emergencies (I understand sometimes this is necessary, but family emergencies are very common with FDWs because they often come from large families) have to put her in a non-air conditioned utility closet to sleep (yes, I know this practice is common in Asia and it's better than where the maids came from, but I'd still feel awful about it), I don't want to have to justify to her every time my kid throws a temper tantrum, I don't want to have to keep an eye on her to see if she's following my instructions (wash dishes in hot water with soap, not just run cold water over them), etc. If I'm too nice, she'll take advantage of me, but I am a nice person. It's a balancing act I didn't want to deal with.

People will tell you to "get a transfer maid" from an expat who's leaving Singapore because she's trained, instead of a maid from an agency because agencies often lie about maid qualifications. A transfer maid might be a good option, but just because the maid worked well for one family doesn't mean she'll fit in well with you. You could always fire a maid who's not working out, but how do you know her replacement will be any better? Go through too many maids in a certain time frame and you get flagged by the Ministry of Manpower.

It's really up to you and what you think will work best with your living situation. Some people are happy with a live-in maid, others are happy without one.

I'm also a stay-at-home mom of a 2-year-old and just wanted to share my thoughts. This is not a cut against the hard-working maids in Singapore or the people who employ them. It's just my personal opinion.

[Beeroclock]

I agree that the maid decision is complex. Certainly need to think beyond cost comparison and consider privacy, space, interference with parenting, legal obligations, ethics, etc etc. A lot of factors. I laugh when I hear some expat friend say I must get a maid purely because I'll never have the chance to do this ever again back home, and not really thinking through anything. There is also a massive luck factor in the maid selection (which can be helped of course by making a good effort in interviewing but nonetheless you will still need luck).

My personal opinion, for SAHM with one kid, I also would not get a maid, but with two or more kids, I would be inclined to have one here. But it's a very individual choice and like most things in life requires a lot of effort to make it work well.

[CaptainBullus]

We are moving to Singapore in July and from my research I would say there isn't much in the way of condos or entertainment around Pioneer. We have decided to stay out West as it is near my wife's place of work and so we are concentrating our flat hunting efforts on condos near Lakeside and Boon Lay MRT. If you want to be closer to the traditional ex-pat living areas then you could look at Holland Village/Farrer Rd areas. As mentioned earlier it depends on how much you want to trade off commuting time vs location/amenities. BA for what it's worth I agree with you too!

[beppi]

If you only have one child and the child is in preschool and if you're not going to be working, you really don't need a live-in maid. There, I said it.

I agree wholeheartedly!
A lot of people become lazy with housework, just because they can. And then they claim they "need" a maid.
We never had one, despite both of us working full time and having a baby. It works if you want it to. (But you can't be lazy!)

[Usmom]

Thanks for advice. I think we will not get a maid. What things do u wish you had packed with you when arriving to live in sg? What things have you found are must haves that you brought or wish you brought with you?

[JR8]

yes you guys are right about specifics, husband will be working in the heart of pioneer area at Jalan Ahmad Ibrahim and Gul way. I guess we will see what the allowance is. There will be no help for preschool as child is only a few years old. Is it easy to hire help and what are the average costs for part time help to clean and take care of child? What do you guys think of the pioneer area? for eating and shopping and convenience? are there a lot of families living in the area?

Pioneer? I had to look up where that is; perhaps that speaks volumes.

It seems to be out in the industrial west. Pioneering indeed? Even with the familiarity that comes with a few years here, there is no way I'd want to live that far towards the western fringe. 15 stops to City Hall? Your taxi bills would be huge, and I expect later in the evenings many cabbies would dismiss you with a laugh if you suggested such a destination.

I suspect you'd spend a great deal of time travelling to places you want to go (shops, restaurants etc).

I'd find a compromise. Consider something more central, and let your husband do some commuting. It'll be better for him not 'being above the shop', and better for your family and family's social life being somewhat 'closer in' to town.

Just my 2c.

[Usmom]

I really appreciate all the advice so far. I have looked at all the links and searches you have suggested. What to bring from the U.S. is very interesting.
We also have more details about the relo.
Priorities:
- your budget (approx range) 10K housing allowance
- your workplace/s (don't name names, just approx neighbourhood) Pioneer, far west end
- the size and/or type of property that you are seeking (#bedrooms, on-site facilities etc) would like a 3 bd. but would be ok with 2 bd.
- will you have a car here? no car, company will pick up taxi bill to and from work
- proximity to transport required. MRT-subway/buses/the airport/Malay border post (if so, which one). top on our priority list is walking distance/proximity to hawer/grocery/stores that are relatively cheap for singapore
- will you have any accompanying children needing to attend school? If so, age/s? 1 child 2 years old, possible to place him in part time preschool or activities
- are you looking at private (international/fee-paying, or local schools?) would like to get him in a part time preschool or activities school for some music, dance, art, etc.. willing to pay fee, would like within walking distance or at least very close proximity
- will your employer being funding any fees; or will you, 'out of pocket'? company will pay housing allowance and taxi transport to/from work
- is remaining within a national curriculum important; if so what nationality are you? n/a very open, U.S. citizen
- have you identified any such schools yet? no

Nice to have:
- will you need to be able to say walk to the local shops, a library, your doctor, a market, and so on? this would be ideal and at the top of our priority list, husband willing to commute longer to work
- access to any specific sport, social, and recreation facilities? n/a
- are you considering bringing any pets. If so what kind, and will they require outdoor access and/or exercise? n/a
- are you considering bringing any parents/in-laws etc? Do they have specific needs (for example difficulty climbing stairs?) n/a

Your current home and commute:
- are you already a city dweller? i.e. Are you used to city-centre hustle and bustle, or would you hope for a bit more peace and quiet? doesn't matter if surrounding the apartment is busy, but would like apartment itself to be very quiet while inside the apartment itself, this is another priority, we would also love to have places to walk and take child out to enjoy
- what is the size and type (apartment, house+garden etc) of your current home? one story 2600 sq.ft home on 17K sq. foot land
- what are any current commute times like? commutes 35-40min. each way

These are our preferences: high ceilings, furnished or does one need to rent furniture too?, new and super clean and quiet while inside apartment, pool, within walking distance or very close proximity to hawker/grocery and close to mrt/bus, nice park or area to walk and enjoy with family. TIA

[JR8]

Ooooh-K. First outing for the above questionnaire/template, and it’s interesting to see what ‘data’ is garners...

Some top of my head thoughts...

1) 10k, workplace out west, 2 adults + toddler, you’re going to be spoilt for choice with housing. Don’t get me wrong, if you want to spend that centrally you’ll have zero problem. If you are ok moving out just a little, you’ll get a lot more for your money. If I scaled up my rent (‘Zone 1/2 borders’)to your budget, I’d be looking at about 1600-1800ft. I’d consider how much space in your home isn’t used. You have to be pragmatic here, property is very $$$. Would you be ok with a 1000ft 3-bed place, (say $5k in Zone 2?) and if so would the employer give the cash equivalent of the extra $5k a month? Wow, if so... that could fund some amazing holidays! Smile If you feel a need to be right in D10 fair enough, but I think one should take a moment to consider the premium that that is coming at.
3) In Pioneer you could probably get a 12-bed for that! Even right in the prime expat zone of D10 $10k/2-bed is very eminently doable.
4) Nice!
5) Right that suggests more of an established and mixed local/expat neighbourhood, rather than say the likes of Caribbean/Reflections at Keppel, and such like.
6-10) nothing to add I can think of. You can sort those matters out when you get here.
11) I’m starting to think about, somewhere conveniently just on the westside of the D9/10/11 central ‘corridor’. But, this is not an area I know at all ...
12) If you see a place you like, use Google maps to check out the neighbourhood. If you want peace, ensure you are not within proximity of major roads, schools, bus stations, petrol stations, community halls, major building sites, and so on ... It’s hard to get away from all of this, but just be aware of it.
15) If you keep the windows shut, you will most likely need to run air-con. If you’re lucky you might get a condo with a walking path, and lots of greenery etc. But most of that kind of RnR isn’t really what condo dwellers expect to find at home. Rather you’d have to head for a park, and so on.
16) Ok! Well, I think it might serve you well to consider how much less you think you could deal with. I’m not saying you have to. But in the centre that would cost $$$, out into Zone2, it’ll be less. You need to consider what you need, and where on the <centre> you happy to compromise on ...
17) Ok, with taxis to and fro per 11) above it shouldn’t be dissimilar, and certainly not worse, here.

High ceilings? No, well, I’ve never seen it here. 8-10’ is what we’ve had in out last two places.
If the landlord provides furniture, it can be ok, as long as you’re ok with vinyl sofas and the like ...

[nanana]

Cascadale condo in the East has high ceiling.

[Usmom]

There is no overage given to us, so what we don't spend they will keep. So I am aiming for a really nice and new place but with a hawker and 'cheap' stores within walking distance. I feel more comfortable around locals and expats more at our income level than around rich people. Does this combo exist? My husband is tall but he will have to deal with lower ceilings since Singapore condos tend not to have higher ceiling from what I have been told. lol, thank you for the suggested condo in the east, it is just too long of a commute for husband.
How is district 3,4,5, 21? I guess what I'm trying to say is I want a really nice, clean and new place to live but not be surrounded by too rich of people cause then all the shops and eateries are expensive in that area too. Does that make sense or is that not true?
What district do most non-millionaire expats live anyways?