There's so much accusation against Singaporeans being 'xenophobic' on the internet lately, so I thought I write this for the benefit of our foreign talents, particular the straight white male.
Before we start, let me state 2 things which this article is NOT.
This guide is NOT written for the purpose of picking up local Sarong Party Girls, or SPGs. These women will typically attached themselves to Caucasian men anyway so you have to be a real dork if you haven't already scored with one of these partygirls. So no, we are not talking SPGs here. We're talking about romancing Singaporean women who would ordinarily not consider dating white men. They could be bankers, teachers, civil servants, lawyers, doctors, salesgirls, accountants, waitresses, students, models or girlfriends or wives of local men.
Also, this guide is NOT written by a Caucasian expat. It is written by a local Singaporean regular clubber and social observer who has witnessed how surprisingly readily local (non-SPG) women get hooked up with Caucasian men. Every expatriate I've met who's been here for a year or more has had at least one fling with a local gal. Likewise, most of my local female friends have admitted to at least one romantic hook-up with a Caucasian expat. Some women reading this will swear they are not "the type" who will date white men, but I've witnessed many of these "types" eventually hooking up with white men, and some even end up tying the knot.
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Forget about Singapore's reputation as being an unhappy nation where people have the least sex. It is a myth borne out of misguided surveys. Women in Singapore do love sex, and the best part is - they are often discreet about their exploits. But this does not warrant an all-out testosterone-driven approach to court them. That would border on sexual harassment, and it often doesn't get what you really want. The key to romancing local women is POLITE FLIRTATION. And here I must add that it is more advantageous if you are Caucasian and English-speaking.
8 ADVANTAGES THAT WHITE EXPATS HAVE OVER LOCAL MEN
#1. Your own apartment
Inviting local women to your apartment is something most local guys can't do (thanks to high rent and government policy on public housing). Most local single men still live with their parents, so having your own apartment puts you in the driver's seat. It could be a HDB flat or a condo, but not hotel rooms on first dates please, as they carry a stigma of making the girl look cheap. And the other good news is - you don't need a car. Taxis will do just fine.
#2. Local women are friendly towards foreign guests, particularly Caucasians (who act gentlemanly)
Despite a survey that characterized Singaporeans as most world's most emotionless people, local women are particularly polite, kind and hospitable towards Caucasian tourists and expats. This is a huge advantage. You can use this to ask local women about the most mundane things - food, directions, language, culture, etc. Local men doing the same thing will get brushed off as a bore. So after you have gotten the woman's undivided attention, ask them out in order to show you around town. And you'll be surprised many will. And there you have it - your first date.
#3. You express yourselves better
Singapore is the only Asian country with English as its first language. Despite that, most local men's oratory skills are mediocre, so here's where you can fill the vacuum with women who perk up to hear men speak their mother tongue in confident, unbroken and sexy fluidity. Hot tip: Speak slower than you would normally do back home, and tone down on the accent. Also, don't forget to listen and allow the girl to speak, with your eyes fixated on hers.
#4. You arouse curiosity
Singaporean women grew up on a pop culture diet of Western TV, movies and music, and a little part of them wants to know what it feels like to be romanced by a white man. By the colour of your skin, you already arouse curiosity. You can turn that curiosity into attention, interest and a date.
#5. Local women cut you more slack for sleeping around
Yes, you read it correctly. The stereotype of the promiscuous Western male is accepted by the local women as intrinsic in your DNA. If you have been sleeping around with multiple partners, the Singaporean women is more likely to overlook your indiscretions than she would with a local man. Strange but true.
#6. Local women lose their sexual inhibition for you
There is a wild sex kitten hidden in some women, and most will opt to unleash it with the white man than with local men. Perhaps they see you as the embodiment of sexual liberation or maybe you are the transient lover whom they trust to keep their wildest sexual desires a secret, but whatever the case, you're in for one hell of a wet and wild ride once you snag one.
#7. It's easy to break into both expat and local social circles
Your entry point into the social life in Singapore is eased by your accessibility into the expat community. Just announce you're new in Singapore and you'll get invited to a party in no time. But you don't want to be stuck in the expat bubble where you'll meet only the SPGs. So you need to break into a local social circle, which is relatively easy too. Just ask a local friend or colleague if you can hang out and you'll be rewarded into a world of connectivity with local women who may be curious (see tip #4).
#8. You offer the lure of a marriage ticket out of Singapore
The women will not mention it, but at the back of their minds they know you offer the possibility of a ticket to live in truly First World countries with better quality of life. It may not materialise in the end, but it certainly does not hurt to offer that silent bait in the course of romance.
WHERE TO HOOK UP WITH LOCAL WOMEN
1. At the workplace
They could be colleagues, clients, bosses, partners, vendors or interns. They are could be single, attached, married or bisexual. If you have any romantic interest in her, just go for it. Life is short, and your time in Singapore is shorter.
Projected conversion rate : 70%
2. Around the workplace.
Fancy someone from the neighboring company, at the lunch canteen or at the smoking areas? Go up and offer to exchange name cards. And text her immediately when you get back to your desk.
Projected conversion rate : 60%
3. Hang out with locals
See above tip #7.
Projected conversion rate : 70%
4. Join a local hobby club
Needless to say, sign up for an activity where you'll find women in the same room - yoga, dance, aerobics, alternative healing, arts and crafts
etc. Deploy tips #2, #3 and #4.
Projected conversion rate : 60%
5. Nightclubbing
If you haven't noticed, the following places are crawling with whites - Clarke Quay, Boat Quay, Robertson Quay, MBS and Club Street. In order to avoid competition, I recommend you head to places with more local women and less white men - Zouk, Butter Factory, Kyo etc. Look out for groups of girls on their night out, slide up to them on the dancefloor, put your head close to their ears and pay them a compliment. Sure, it's corny but you'd be surprised it works because local guys don't do enough of that. Now put your hands on their waists and see the reaction. If your hands remain there for the next 10 seconds, it is a signal romance may be possible.
Projected conversion rate : 70%
6. Outside clubs
This is a tactic not often used but I've seen it worked. Near closing time, head out to the exit lobby and look out for girls, who are already intoxicated, and start a conversation. It could something cheesy like, "Hey Celeste, we met inside a while ago. Where are you gals going? Supper? Have you an extra seat in the cab? Do you want to come to my condo and hang out a bit. I've got food and wine and a great balcony view of the city."
Projected conversion rate : 50%
7. Approaching women in the outside environment
Singapore is not a city where strangers strike up conversations on the fly. A local guy approaching a women in the cafe, mall or on the street would be summarily dismissed as a weirdo, an insurance salesman or even a sex pervert. But as a Caucasian, you stand a higher chance that the woman will stop and hear you out (refer to tips #2, #3 and $4). You've got that precious 30 seconds to ask for her number or give her your number. I reckon 2 out of 10 women will reciprocate to a white man. A local guy will probably get zero.
Projected conversion rate : 20%
8. Online dating sites
This is an increasing popular method to meet new women. The variety is mouth-watering. There are singles, divorcees, bisexuals, women looking for long-term, short term, friendships and even casual sex. Set up a profile and market yourself as an expatriate new in town and wanting to know Asian women, Write humorous descriptions of yourself. Be humble and polite. Most of all, make the first move. Send messages to all the ladies who strike your fancy. Not all will reply so cast your net wide.
Projected conversion rate 70%
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Finally, I end with the elephant in the room. What about money? Don't expats need to be rich to attract local women?
Answer : Wealth is useful but it's not essential. You don't need to be an Anton Casey to snag a local pageant queen. I've seen local women financially supporting their expat lovers and vice versa. I've also seen financially equal relationships. The stereotype of the materialistic Singaporean woman is just that - a stereotype. What Singaporean women really want is attention and the thrill of hot romance.
So there you have it - 16 hot tips. If you haven't scored a date with a local girl within a month after trying out these tips, I guarantee you two things :
1. You are not doing it right.
2. You don't want it bad enough.
DJ Tommy
TRS Contributor
Hit me up if you want to thank or punch me : [email protected]
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