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Unique maid situation- need advice

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valleyman
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Unique maid situation- need advice

Post by valleyman » Sun, 27 Apr 2014 8:21 pm

My maid of 2.5 years sprung a surprise on us today when she told us that she has found a job in HK and her visa would be coming in a couple of months(June-July). She has been extremely good to us and our small kid and hence I am in a dilemma.

I do want to get a transfer maid immediately since my parents would be over in 2 weeks and we could go to work leaving our small girl at home with a new maid, knowing that my parents can supervise her. Also, my mom could train her in the way we would want.

However, my agent told me that once I cancel my current maid's pass she can utmost stay here for 3 days. She doesn't want to go to Philippines now and wants to go to HK from here because of money/visa/other issues. Also, I do not qualify for 2 maids as I have only 1 child.

And there's the dilemma. If I let her stay till July and then get a maid it will be very difficult for us to train and leave the baby alone with her. On the other hand getting a maid ASAP would leave my current one in a lurch.

What would you suggest ? Thanks

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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Sun, 27 Apr 2014 8:36 pm

Your maid isn't doing you any favours, why should you do her any? Just Askin'.
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by Wd40 » Sun, 27 Apr 2014 8:51 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:Your maid isn't doing you any favours, why should you do her any? Just Askin'.
She has, by telling him about it in advance.

OP, would it be possible to delay your parents trip to coincide with the new maid's arrival in July or have them stay until July or call them again in July? If the maid has been good to you for so long, the right thing to do would be to let her stay until July. Your parents arrival is just a coincidence, what would you have done had the maid quit like 2-3 months ago?

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Post by zzm9980 » Sun, 27 Apr 2014 11:48 pm

Wd40 wrote:
sundaymorningstaple wrote:Your maid isn't doing you any favours, why should you do her any? Just Askin'.
She has, by telling him about it in advance.
I agree, plus the fact she's been "extremely good to us and our small kid".

Knowing the shit life most maids lead, and since it sounds like you like her, I'd take the hit and not boot her out of Singapore. You'd be giving her a much larger headache than what she is potentially giving you with the new maid. But then that's just me and how I treat people I like that have been good to me. It's ultimately up to you. There are no additional options we can give you, you just have to decide how you want to treat her in this situation.

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Post by Beeroclock » Sun, 27 Apr 2014 11:55 pm

Wd40 wrote:
sundaymorningstaple wrote:Your maid isn't doing you any favours, why should you do her any? Just Askin'.
She has, by telling him about it in advance.

OP, would it be possible to delay your parents trip to coincide with the new maid's arrival in July or have them stay until July or call them again in July? If the maid has been good to you for so long, the right thing to do would be to let her stay until July. Your parents arrival is just a coincidence, what would you have done had the maid quit like 2-3 months ago?
I agree, would try find a compromise as she's served you well for over 2 years. Anyway it might take a little while to find the replacement transfer maid.

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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Mon, 28 Apr 2014 6:51 am

I would agree with all the naysayers but for the fact that she is only giving what could amount to only 5 weeks notice (June). That is to find a replacement and break her in. Which is hard enough to do if you in the best of times. If she is been there 2.5 years, she should have just started her new contract. Had she been fair, she should have told valleyman at the start of her new contract that she was going to try to get a visa for HK not wait till on potentially 5 weeks before quitting. We are going to have toOn agree to disagree on this one as small children are involved as well.

On another note, has anybody explained to her that the conditions may well be worse now in HK, looking a recent incidents there. She might be jumping out of the pot and into the fire.
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by PNGMK » Mon, 28 Apr 2014 8:32 am

Can your maid help find a suitable maid to replace her? This informal sort of job recommending often goes on and if you're a more desirable employer your maid should have plenty of candidates lined up.

Unless your maid is going for a better job than being a maid in HK I tend to agree it's going to be worse than being in Singapore./

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Post by Beeroclock » Mon, 28 Apr 2014 10:16 am

sundaymorningstaple wrote:I would agree with all the naysayers but for the fact that she is only giving what could amount to only 5 weeks notice (June). That is to find a replacement and break her in. Which is hard enough to do if you in the best of times. If she is been there 2.5 years, she should have just started her new contract. Had she been fair, she should have told valleyman at the start of her new contract that she was going to try to get a visa for HK not wait till on potentially 5 weeks before quitting. We are going to have toOn agree to disagree on this one as small children are involved as well.

On another note, has anybody explained to her that the conditions may well be worse now in HK, looking a recent incidents there. She might be jumping out of the pot and into the fire.
I understood one month is a standard notice period in maid contracts ? I've never used an agency, but for the template contracts I have seen and used myself, have 1 months notice to terminate for either party (except of course if there is a performance issue in which case immediate).

Regarding declaring upfront an intention to go HK, I think most employers will reject on this basis. And for sure the same thing can happen in reverse direction too, i.e. expat employer says they will be in Singapore for long-term when privately they have intentions to move abroad much sooner. So personally I find this maid's behavior is within norms and actually you could say she acted in good faith by informing the employer ASAP her plans, to allow him to plan further ahead, rather than really springing a surprise and serving notice at the last possible moment.

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Post by zzm9980 » Mon, 28 Apr 2014 12:12 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:]
On another note, has anybody explained to her that the conditions may well be worse now in HK, looking a recent incidents there. She might be jumping out of the pot and into the fire.
It's worlds better there. I know a few former maids there that managed to marry locals and/or get into 'real' jobs. Just that alone proves how much better HK is for maids than SG. Two I know even used to work in SG; One actually thought her employer was nice, the second interestingly was hired as a maid, but she worked at a hawker in the food court in Marina Square. Apparently her employer owned the booth and put her to work there, giving her more money than a maid would make (but probably less than required to get someone a WP). I guess the jig was up when someone ratted her out to MOM.

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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Mon, 28 Apr 2014 12:43 pm

Looking at the demonstrations and such and the recent case of maid abuse with the Indonesian maid in HK would tend to say there are equal amount of both types there. Sometimes the devil you know is better than the devil you don't know.

http://qz.com/176354/how-hong-kong-maid ... hout-asia/

http://www.scmp.com/news/hong-kong/arti ... kong-maids

http://globalnation.inquirer.net/99794/ ... e-of-maids
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Re: Unique maid situation- need advice

Post by Beeroclock » Mon, 28 Apr 2014 1:21 pm

valleyman wrote:My maid of 2.5 years sprung a surprise on us today when she told us that she has found a job in HK and her visa would be coming in a couple of months(June-July). She has been extremely good to us and our small kid and hence I am in a dilemma.

I do want to get a transfer maid immediately since my parents would be over in 2 weeks and we could go to work leaving our small girl at home with a new maid, knowing that my parents can supervise her. Also, my mom could train her in the way we would want.

However, my agent told me that once I cancel my current maid's pass she can utmost stay here for 3 days. She doesn't want to go to Philippines now and wants to go to HK from here because of money/visa/other issues. Also, I do not qualify for 2 maids as I have only 1 child.

And there's the dilemma. If I let her stay till July and then get a maid it will be very difficult for us to train and leave the baby alone with her. On the other hand getting a maid ASAP would leave my current one in a lurch.

What would you suggest ? Thanks
Valleyman, can you pls advise regarding the notice period you have with your maid ? For example, in this scenario as you describe, does your contract really allow you to terminate her immediately, or you have to give X days/weeks/months notice ?

I'm just writing a new FDW contract myself, and interested to know what is the usual practice

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Post by Wd40 » Mon, 28 Apr 2014 3:12 pm

sundaymorningstaple wrote:Looking at the demonstrations and such and the recent case of maid abuse with the Indonesian maid in HK would tend to say there are equal amount of both types there. Sometimes the devil you know is better than the devil you don't know.

http://qz.com/176354/how-hong-kong-maid ... hout-asia/

http://www.scmp.com/news/hong-kong/arti ... kong-maids

http://globalnation.inquirer.net/99794/ ... e-of-maids
We must also bear in mind that Hong Kong's ranking in Freedom of Press index is 58 v/s Singapore's 149 and make adjustments accordingly while comparing ;)

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Post by sundaymorningstaple » Mon, 28 Apr 2014 4:58 pm

I didn't include the NYTimes article. I was but then as it just centred on the Indonesia maid, I figured it was overkill (sic!).
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers

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Post by valleyman » Mon, 28 Apr 2014 10:08 pm

Thanks for the comments everyone. The reason why we want to be nice to her is that she has taken care of our daughter since she was a new born. My daughter is extremely fond of her and we feel that she would be heartbroken when the helper leaves. Maybe that's why a part of me wants to delay this for as long as possible. The notice period in her contract is a month.

She has a sister in HK who is getting all this done and apparently her plan is to emigrate to Canada from HK. Also, she said that the salary she would be getting in HK would be around 700$.

To your comment SMS, yes I did feel betrayed as I had just renewed her contract a few months back. Not only that, I recently paid for her passport renewal as well. We had also sent her home on paid holidays two times in the last two years and treated her as close to family as possible.

I can't delay my parents visit as we have a few things planned.

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Post by Beeroclock » Mon, 28 Apr 2014 11:26 pm

Thank you for reverting on notice period.

Btw I would think contractually you might need to honor it unless you have another grounds for termination, and that will basically come to June anyway...

I can understand the betrayed feeling too and it's not easy to find good helpers nowadays, but still reckon best approach is to be grateful for the 2.5 yrs service you received and bring it to a pleasant conclusion, if possible .

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