Discuss everything about domestic helper and babysitter issues here
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vanish1978
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by vanish1978 » Sat, 15 Feb 2014 9:17 am
Hi All
I have been told that the best way to get a good FDW in singapore is via recommendation. My current domestic helper is leaving Singapore for good to get married when her Contract ends which is in May this year. I am working and keen to find a good replacement whose primary responsibility would be to take care of my 16 month old kid. Are any of you leaving Singapore and want to recommend your helper for the same?
Thanks a ton in advance!!!
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Steve1960
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by Steve1960 » Sun, 16 Feb 2014 8:13 pm
Employ a qualified nanny not a domestic worker.
You want your kid taken care of by someone who has never had any training in child care and with no recognised qualifications or background checks?
Why not have your FDW take part in some nuclear fusion experiments while you are at it I am sure she will adapt just fine.
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vanish1978
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by vanish1978 » Tue, 18 Feb 2014 3:54 pm
[quote="Steve1960"]Employ a qualified nanny not a domestic worker.
You want your kid taken care of by someone who has never had any training in child care and with no recognised qualifications or background checks?
Why not have your FDW take part in some nuclear fusion experiments while you are at it I am sure she will adapt just fine.[/quote]
Steve 1960 - Thanks for your suggestion. However, I had an FDW for the past 2 years and she did a great job of taking care of my baby in my absence...so my experience is quite different. I think a lot of the FDWs now are quite experienced in doing the same, and I am keen to find one such helper. Moreover, I cannot afford a nanny and an FDW.
I didnt quite understand your "nuclear fusion" comment - its quite out of context - hence can you pl clarify?
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vanish1978
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by vanish1978 » Tue, 18 Feb 2014 3:56 pm
[quote="Juliatham"]Hi Vanish1978 , I have a qualified helper whom I would like to help her find a good employer before her contract ends in mid March. Would you be keen to take her?[/quote]
Hi Juliatham : Can you give me more details about your helper? Is she good at taking care little kids? Mid march is a bit soon for me though....
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BoroBoy
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by BoroBoy » Tue, 18 Feb 2014 9:41 pm
Sorry I don't usually post negative comments but this type of thread bugs me. Why don't you hire a domestic maid to do the domestic work and look after your own kid?
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Hannieroo
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by Hannieroo » Tue, 18 Feb 2014 11:36 pm
If people need to work, they need to work. It's not over nice to judge. These things are very personal choice.
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earthfriendly
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by earthfriendly » Wed, 19 Feb 2014 1:12 am
Actually, us mothers (and fathers too) do not get any formal training in parenting prior to having kids. We just dive in and do the best of our abilities. I think certain personality traits will help and I would prefer someone a little older, with patience. Many maids in SG are quite young.
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Fortan
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by Fortan » Wed, 19 Feb 2014 8:20 am
BoroBoy wrote:Sorry I don't usually post negative comments but this type of thread bugs me. Why don't you hire a domestic maid to do the domestic work and look after your own kid?
That is quite judgmental... perhaps you shouldn't post negative comments at all?
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the lynx
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by the lynx » Wed, 19 Feb 2014 8:44 am
Now that I'm reading the whole thread, I think there has been confusion between two parties regarding nanny/FDW.
OP and other posters here think that it perfectly normal to assume that FDWs are also nannies in their job description. Which is a legit assumption because that's what most people do here anyway.
BoroBoy and Steve1960, on the other hand, think that FDWs are not adequately trained to handle babies and children and FDWs should stick to household chores. Which is also valid because quite many FDWs here are actually new, inexperienced and on top of that, hail from rural parts of home countries where electrical appliances are not common, let alone caring for a child of different culture/nationality/race.
I'd advise OP to check through the credentials of the prospective nanny from previous employer or maid agency before hiring her. And also explicitly state that she would be expected to care for young children as part of her job in that household. Many nannies become disgruntled because most of them obviously didn't sign up to become nannies as a job extension, and this would come as a rude shock to them. That's where the typical maid problems come in and both parties would be at lose-lose situation. Even worse when a child is in the picture.
The same situation applies for taking care of elderly or infirm members of the family.
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x9200
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by x9200 » Wed, 19 Feb 2014 9:44 am
earthfriendly wrote:Actually, us mothers (and fathers too) do not get any formal training in parenting prior to having kids. We just dive in and do the best of our abilities. I think certain personality traits will help and I would prefer someone a little older, with patience. Many maids in SG are quite young.
What seldom applies to any unqualified, underpaid, semi-random FWD.
It is enough to go outside in any of the more expact populated areas and observe how many of the maids take care of children.
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Hannieroo
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by Hannieroo » Wed, 19 Feb 2014 10:43 am
I think it's a problem if you have an inexperienced woman who is underpaid and still expected to do all of the household chores. FDWs are not superwomen. But I am sure OP is aware of that.
I've never worked and my FDW does very little child care, even less when he's actually awake. But I would trust her even though she has no children of her own, she has the patience of a saint and is more safety conscious than I am.
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bro75
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by bro75 » Wed, 19 Feb 2014 11:33 am
Some people are fortunate that their spouses do not need to work and can take care of their children, but for many families this is not a feasible option. Also for foreigners in SG, help from extended family is very difficult to get. Child care centres are another option but for foreigners, this is more expensive and the operating hours of most of these centres is not convenient for some people with non-standard working hours.
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x9200
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by x9200 » Wed, 19 Feb 2014 11:42 am
They are all underpaid and they are going to be. As much as people are pretty happy to express their holy anger and discontent in places like this one, hardly anybody is going to provide a decent pay. Also I don't see any of the FDW hired for children working for the children only. Perhaps OP is very different but she already mentioned she could not afford both the nanny and the FDW so a superwoman is expected.
Actually what scares me more is the luck factor in hiring the maids. I have seen so many cases of very, very bad care, some of them on the edge of being criminal negligence. Looks like a lot of people make bad choices or the pool of the trustful maids is limited.
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sundaymorningstaple
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by sundaymorningstaple » Wed, 19 Feb 2014 1:28 pm
In Singapore the pool is extremely limited as it is the destination of last resort for FWDs. However, it looks like HK is trying it's damnedest to catch up. This, therefore, means those FWDs who come here are generally scrappings from the bottom of the barrel. Granted there is the occasional gem among the rabble but it is surely not the norm.
SOME PEOPLE TRY TO TURN BACK THEIR ODOMETERS. NOT ME. I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW WHY I LOOK THIS WAY. I'VE TRAVELED A LONG WAY, AND SOME OF THE ROADS WEREN'T PAVED. ~ Will Rogers
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Steve1960
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by Steve1960 » Wed, 19 Feb 2014 3:10 pm
Hence why we (despite the jokes made here at my expense lol) picked a friend of my wife's in the Philippines for a direct hire, still through an agency of course. Oh and I have already signed the document required by the Philippine Embassy clearly laying out the basic rights they expect our maid to have and it assures she does not start work here with a loan of any kind to pay off, I am covering all expenses. End of the first month she will have her first salary. She is due to arrive around 2nd week of March.
She has 6 months to show she can do the job to the standards I expect over a sustained period then I have told her I will increase the basic salary.
What I will not do is use her as a child carer which I feel requires formal training and more significant background checks. Just my view though.
OK you guys can have a field day with the Ménage à trois jokes again now
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