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Sundry humour

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Strong Eagle
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Re: Sundry humour

Postby Strong Eagle » Thu, 27 Sep 2018 10:13 pm

Stealing and sharing.

archcherub
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Re: Sundry humour

Postby archcherub » Fri, 28 Sep 2018 4:36 pm

earthfriendly wrote:
archcherub wrote:
i honestly think donald won't enjoy living in the old white house.
for god sake, he is so used to luxury in new york!


Ditto. And that is why his wife opted to stay in NY. Why settle for the large sprawling 'burb when you can be within walking access to world class entertainment, arts and food scene?


yeah new york is the best.
lol. to be honest, i think his wife really hates it when trump became president

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sundaymorningstaple
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Re: Sundry humour

Postby sundaymorningstaple » Tue, 02 Oct 2018 9:34 am

Four men went golfing one day. Three of them headed to the first tee and the fourth went into the clubhouse to take care of the bill.

The three men started talking and bragging about their sons.

The first man told the others, "My son is a home builder, and he is so successful that he gave a friend a new home for free. Just gave it to him!"

The second man said, "My son was a car salesman, and now he owns a multi-line dealership. He's so successful that he gave one of his friends a new Mercedes, fully loaded."

The third man, not wanting to be outdone, bragged, "My son is a stockbroker, and he's doing so well that he gave his friend an entire portfolio."

The fourth man joined them on the tee after a few minutes of taking care of business. The first man mentioned, "We were just talking about our sons. How is yours doing?"

The fourth man replied, "Well, my son is gay and go-go dances in a gay bar."

The other three men grew silent as he continued, "I'm not totally thrilled about the dancing job, but he must be doing well. His last three boyfriends gave him a house, a brand new Mercedes, and a stock portfolio."

NashChatty
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Re: Sundry humour

Postby NashChatty » Tue, 16 Oct 2018 11:48 am

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door..

"Hurry!" she said, "stand in the corner." She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder. "Don't move until I tell you to," she whispered. "Just pretend you're a statue."

"What's this, honey?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.

"Oh, it's just a statue," she replied nonchalantly. "The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked it so much, I got one for us too."

No more was said about the statue, not even later that night when they went to sleep. Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went to the kitchen and returned a while later with a sandwich and a glass of milk.

"Here," he said to the 'statue', "eat something. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths' for three days and nobody offered me as much as a glass of water."

Hope everyone enjoyed that joke. Anyway, newbie here. I'm glad to have found this great online Singapore Expats community. I know I'll learn a lot from here. Whenever I'm taking a break from this particular interest, I'm usually found at home, treating my Pomeranian to his nylabone and watching TV with my wife. Such a simple, yet, happy life. Cheers, fellas!
Last edited by NashChatty on Wed, 24 Oct 2018 9:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.

NashChatty
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Re: Sundry humour

Postby NashChatty » Fri, 19 Oct 2018 11:06 pm

Saw a man standing on one leg at an ATM..




Confused, I asked him what he was doing... He said: “Just checking my balance.”

mbellow
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Re: Sundry humour

Postby mbellow » Thu, 22 Nov 2018 6:24 pm

The doctor to the patient: 'You are very sick'
The patient to the doctor: 'Can I get a second opinion?'
The doctor again: 'Yes, you are very ugly too...'


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