Work-related stress/depression

[Asian_Geekette]

I'm 35. And you're right, that is a well-learned skill. I should just learn to rise above the bullshit and not let it affect me.

That's the spirit! Just take one day at a time.

[morenangpinay]

i used to be stressed about work and colleagues but i got a hard knock on my head and woke up. I started putting on that "I dont give a f***" attitude and just concentrated on my work. Made me less stressed.

you should do the same.

[offshoreoildude]

Does anyone else have a problem with this? From the moment I arrived in Singapore two-and-a-half years ago, I've experienced totally unprovoked hostility from some of my colleagues, who have made it clear that they resent the presence of 'angmohs' in the office. It was made worse when I received a minor promotion, and there is another white guy on my section who gets the same treatment and is also totally disillusioned.

It's petty, childish, playground stuff and I really should rise above it, but it's hard sometimes. I was transferred to a different section, which was like a breath of fresh air with lovely, nice colleagues, and had I stayed there I would be probably be preparing to sign a new contract and settle down in Singapore now. But I was moved back to my old section around seven months ago, when it became short-staffed, and since then it's just got worse. There are only two or three ring-leaders - local women around my age - but the rest follow them like sheep, and the atmosphere in the office is toxic. I was on anti-depressants before, and now I am depressed again. I have five months left on my contract, and I have to see that out to collect a bonus I am really counting on for my future plans. But it's very hard sometimes.

Because of this situation, I have very mixed feelings about Singapore. I try to see the good things about the place, but honestly, it's difficult. Has anyone else experienced anything like this?

Do you give damn? Screw them and mind your own business. Let them boil in that soup of their own resentment. Try to look happy to pour some gasoline into fire. They bully even themselves, being foreigner just makes it easier for them to justify their unreleased sexual energy (there are so many of them who are still virgins at age of 27-28-29, sometimes older).
Nobody can fire you unless your extremely underperform or outperform others. So until the contract is over, you're safe.

I know a number of Singaporeans who don't hate me. But if I start mixing them with others talking to them like "Why Singaporeans don't like foreigners so much?", they will of course.

Old virgins are a uniquely Singaporean thing. Even LKY complained about this a long time ago!

[sundaymorningstaple]

OSOD speaks with experience!

[taxico]

...I was on anti-depressants before, and now I am depressed again...

maybe it's time to see a shrink or a psychiatrist again. it's good to check in from time to time, especially when your environment or triggers change.

[Sergei82]

OSOD speaks with experience!

I have multiple experiences on that. Can anybody hypothesize about the reason?

[Sergei82]

...I was on anti-depressants before, and now I am depressed again...

maybe it's time to see a shrink or a psychiatrist again. it's good to check in from time to time, especially when your environment or triggers change.

Psychiatrists are those who "treat" untreatable - like Down syndrome or idiocy. I guess, you meant psychotherapist (who in turn is not a psychologist).

I say: Singaporean psychotherapists suck! I had an experience, all I heard is that I am such a good boy, and nothing else! What a waste of a lot of money on nothing! Maybe Singaporeans like to hear that, but I go there usually with some concrete issues only!

[v4jr4]

...I was on anti-depressants before, and now I am depressed again...

maybe it's time to see a shrink or a psychiatrist again.

Or weird pranks like this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sUOV8QFl ... re=related

[JR8]

Mr. M, have to tried discussing this with HR, and/or do you think you could?

They're not just there to deal with visas, forms, payroll etc, they are there to help advise and support the entire staff. Including through precisely matters like this.

Happy staff are more likely to be productive staff, and vice versa.

Best of luck to you.

[Darthcoder]

Old virgins are a uniquely Singaporean thing. Even LKY complained about this a long time ago!

I am beginning to think my boss might be one such case
She looks like a man so that explains the situation I guess

[nakatago]

I say: Singaporean psychotherapists suck! I had an experience, all I heard is that I am such a good boy, and nothing else! What a waste of a lot of money on nothing! Maybe Singaporeans like to hear that, but I go there usually with some concrete issues only!

Reminds me of the executives of my previous company. Every one and their sister knew about how sucky management was. But every time there was an assembly and HR matters came up, whatever they said always sound patronizing. One colleague paraphrased, "I have a very special treat for a very special boy. Who's a good little software engineer? Yes, you are..."

[the lynx]

Old virgins are a uniquely Singaporean thing. Even LKY complained about this a long time ago!

I am beginning to think my boss might be one such case
She looks like a man so that explains the situation I guess

Old virgins don't have to behave like man. They can dress up like Dolores Umbridge and still be frustrated dragon lady bosses.

And I have to agree that women, while they are great in multi-tasking and can be passionate about their jobs, they make horrible bosses.

[Sergei82]

Old virgins are a uniquely Singaporean thing. Even LKY complained about this a long time ago!

I am beginning to think my boss might be one such case
She looks like a man so that explains the situation I guess

Following your logic, because so many Singaporean men prefer to look like women, they are virgins too!

[v4jr4]

Old virgins don't have to behave like man. They can dress up like Dolores Umbridge and still be frustrated dragon lady bosses.

And I have to agree that women, while they are great in multi-tasking and can be passionate about their jobs, they make horrible bosses.

Reminds me about my friend's situation, where the lady boss is making the office as her second home. My friend said that she can't even tell if the lady boss take a bath or not, especially for a big project.

[offshoreoildude]

Old virgins are a uniquely Singaporean thing. Even LKY complained about this a long time ago!

I am beginning to think my boss might be one such case
She looks like a man so that explains the situation I guess

As a good friend said; 'Old Virgins are like laundry, send them out to be done - it's too much hard work to do myself'.