snobby caucasians

CrazyCanuck · Post by **CrazyCanuck** » Mon, 14 Sep 2009 7:01 pm

Hello: We moved into our rather nice condo on East Coast one week ago. It seems that every time I pass anybody caucasian looking, they either turn their head or greet my friendly smile with a blank stare. What is up with everyone? It seems to me that the only nice "friendly" people here are the residents. My husband has noticed the same thing. Is this the way all caucasians are in Singapore? I'm very surprised and disappointed.

littlegreenman · Post by **littlegreenman** » Mon, 14 Sep 2009 7:09 pm

CrazyCanuck wrote:Hello: We moved into our rather nice condo on East Coast one week ago. It seems that every time I pass anybody caucasian looking, they either turn their head or greet my friendly smile with a blank stare. What is up with everyone? It seems to me that the only nice "friendly" people here are the residents. My husband has noticed the same thing. Is this the way all caucasians are in Singapore? I'm very surprised and disappointed.

I am caucasian and I have noticed the same in our condo with all different races and all interracial couples. So I wouldn't really say it is just caucasians.

Post by **Strong Eagle** » Mon, 14 Sep 2009 7:10 pm

No, we're not all like that at all. I figure you can divide the Ang Mo's here into roughly two groups. There are those that are here because it is the necessary 2 or 3 year foreign stint to climb the corporate ladder. They can't wait to get out. They don't intermingle much and living here is sort of beneath them.

Then, there are the Ang Mo's who have made a life here... adopted this country and culture... you'll find them to be much more open.

CrazyCanuck · Post by **CrazyCanuck** » Mon, 14 Sep 2009 7:14 pm

Wow... where can I find the nice people then? My husband and I "chose" to live here and I love my work, but it would be nice to find some people who actually would like to have a glass of wine on a Saturday night. We can't believe the way people actually will go out of their way not to make eye contact!!

QRM · Post by **QRM** » Mon, 14 Sep 2009 8:41 pm

Next time just say out loud "Good morning" that normally disarms the other person. They are probably worried you might be one of those nutty happy clappers who will ask you to pop over for an evening of Bible reading or a donation to their pastors KY fund.

There are quite a few stick in the mud type people who can't be arsed with socializing and find making small talk all a bit of of bore. They are normally found perched on a worn out office chair and hunched over a computer at home.

CrazyCanuck · Post by **CrazyCanuck** » Mon, 14 Sep 2009 9:10 pm

Yes, everything you said is true. I will try the direct "good morning" approach. Thanks for your advice.

ProvenPracticalFlexible · Post by **ProvenPracticalFlexible** » Mon, 14 Sep 2009 11:22 pm

QRM wrote:Next time just say out loud "Good morning" that normally disarms the other person. They are probably worried you might be one of those nutty happy clappers who will ask you to pop over for an evening of Bible reading or a donation to their pastors KY fund.

Or even worse, one of those people who wish to make new friends and hang around with you over a class of wine. I wouldn't think too much of it, some people justdon't wanna make random friends just because they happen to live in the same neighborhood.

carteki · Post by **carteki** » Tue, 15 Sep 2009 2:00 pm

How about inviting some of the friendly residents over? It seems that the caucasians that are mentioned are probably not worth the cost of a bottle of wine...

SunWuKong · Post by **SunWuKong** » Tue, 15 Sep 2009 3:07 pm

Well on the apologetics side, it is somewhat socially awkward to run into someone who believes that just because their skin color is the same as yours, you must have other things in common.

Condo's are terrible places to meet people though, roughly 90% (unsubstantiated statistic) of the population is too busy trying to figure out whether you live on a higher floor than them or earn more, which leaves precious little brainpower to spare for social niceties.

Most people act nice after you crack their shell, however as has already been stated; sometimes its not worth the effort.

taxico · Post by **taxico** » Sun, 20 Sep 2009 12:29 pm

SunWuKong wrote:roughly 90% (unsubstantiated statistic) of the population is too busy trying to figure out whether you live on a higher floor than them or earn more, which leaves precious little brainpower to spare for social niceties.

i hope you're kidding coz that's just retarded.

maneo · Post by **maneo** » Tue, 22 Sep 2009 3:54 am

CrazyCanuck wrote:Hello: We moved into our rather nice condo on East Coast one week ago. It seems that every time I pass anybody caucasian looking, they either turn their head or greet my friendly smile with a blank stare. What is up with everyone? It seems to me that the only nice "friendly" people here are the residents. My husband has noticed the same thing. Is this the way all caucasians are in Singapore? I'm very surprised and disappointed.

It might just be a phase they're going through.
Agree that a friendly "Good Morning" or "Good Afternoon" or whatever should allow you to see if they can get over their own integration issues.

road.not.taken · Post by **road.not.taken** » Tue, 22 Sep 2009 7:02 am

Is this the way all caucasians are in Singapore?

Well no, of course we know this is not true. However, you do hear of expats making entreaties of 'good morning' which are stared down by their Singaporean neighbors. It gets passed off as a cultural difference, so of course it goes both ways.

I don't think it's just a difference of those who like it here and those who don't as Strong Eagle suggested. Some expats want to think of themselves as the sole Ang Mo in a lonely locals-only outpost and seeing another expat disturbs their illusion. Sounds crazy, but I've seen it and heard it over the years.

The good news is there are friendly people of all colors all over Singapore, but the old adage holds true here, at least I think so:

The cushier the assignment, the harder the social circles are to crack.

SunWuKong · Post by **SunWuKong** » Tue, 22 Sep 2009 8:07 am

taxico wrote:
SunWuKong wrote:roughly 90% (unsubstantiated statistic) of the population is too busy trying to figure out whether you live on a higher floor than them or earn more, which leaves precious little brainpower to spare for social niceties.
i hope you're kidding coz that's just retarded.

Who's kidding? This is Singapore, home of the five C's.

ScoobyDoes · Post by **ScoobyDoes** » Tue, 22 Sep 2009 9:43 am

SunWuKong wrote:Well on the apologetics side, it is somewhat socially awkward to run into someone who believes that just because their skin color is the same as yours, you must have other things in common.

For all the rest, this is most apt though most probably for those that work rather than stay at home.

Why is it a necessity to talk to another expat, for example, in the elevator when you've not seen them in the year or two since you moved in and are unlikely to bump into them ever again? I've rarely met the same person twice in the elevator in my three years at the condo. We greet those people on our floor of course but we even hardly see them.

We've seen the same expat family in the pool a lot of Sundays yes, and my wife sometimes during the week and they greet each other only and the kids play a little but other than that there is hardly anything to say.

joliefemme536 · Post by **joliefemme536** » Fri, 25 Sep 2009 5:37 am

This is definitely not limited only to Caucasians. My boyfriend lives on the East Coast and it's like pulling teeth to get anyone to speak to you in his condo. Geez, SPEAK if you are going to take the time and stare at someone's face for a whole minute!!!! Just rude!!!!

Off my soapbox, continue on...

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